Thunder: Oh man, how long has it been since I updated this story? Too long. Here's another chapter. Enjoy
Warning: You might not understand half of this chapter due to arbor-logical stuff.
"Oh Christmas palm, oh Christmas palm!" Jack sang, tying an ornament onto a random palm tree that was on the deck of the Pearl. He was wearing a Santa hat, singing the tune oh Tannenbaum, replacing Tree with the word palm. Will and Liz who were arguing, came up to Jack.
"Jack, we have a couple problems we were hoping you could help us with." Liz asked
"If it involves how to give birth, masturbating, or just doing it, I'll tell you later, but now I have to decorate the palm tree for santa!" Jack said
"Actually, we were having an argument about the tree. You see, I think it's a coconut palm, but Will..." Liz started
"I think it's a Betel palm." he said
"You're both wrong. It's a date palm!" Gibbs said, walking up to the group.
"Everybody is wrong. It's obviously a sago palm!" Pintel
"Actually, sagos trunks look more like upside down christmas trees and are large around the middle parts, while this is rather skinny. Thus in conclusion, this is a windmill palm." Ragetti said. Everybody looked at him dumbfounded.
"Who knew he was smart?" Gibbs whispered to Liz.
"I know I didn't bother to ask. The eye just keeps creeping me out." Liz whispered back.
"You are ALL wrong! This my friends is called a royal palm!" Jack said, getting off his ladder and standing in front of the group.
"OH!" Said everybody in the group when little light bulbs over their heads turned on... except Pintel.
"But if it's a royal palm, how'd you get the ornaments all the way on top of it?" he asked
"With a ladder you dolt." Ragetti said
"Did you just call me a dolt?" Pintel asked, seething with anger.
"No... he did." Ragetti said, pointing to a random pirate.
"I'll git you!" Pintel said, pulling out a medieval flail and chasing after the pirate.
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Jack started hanging garland on the railing of the Pearl as Liz and Will came up to him once again.
"We had other things to ask you." Will said. "Why'd you leave?"
"I had to decorate the ship for Christmas. Duh!" Jack said
"Well, another question we had was how the palm tree came to be on the ship." Li asked. Jack sighed and turned to the couple.
"A swallow." Jack said
"A swallow?" Liz asked
"A swallow." Jack said
"A swallow." Will said disbelieving.
"A swallow! How may time do I have to say it?" Jack asked
"Three." Li said
"Thank you." Jack said. "Long ago, a swallow flew over the ship and dropped a Royal palm tree seed that got stuck between the boards and was watered by rain and thus it grew and is now a Christmas palm!"
"Oh!" the two said.
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It was dark at night and Jack, wearing a large dark pair of sunglasses, plugged two power cords together, causing the whole ship to come alight. He already knew Will and Liz were behind him before they asked their question.
"The lights are powered by paid pixies deep within the confines of the ship." he said. He turned to see them wearing sunglasses as well. Liz had a nice pink pair, while Will wore that weird pair that goes over a persons head.
"What's the meaning of life, the universe, and everything?" They asked in unison. Jack turned to them, lowering his glasses.
"It's forty-two, Savvy?" Jack turned around, but forgot to put his glasses back on.
"AH! MY EYES!!!!" he yelled, holding his eyes, rolling on the deck.
"There's just one more thing I need to tell you Jack." Liz said
"And what would that be?" Jack asked
"Christmas was Last month." Liz said
"..."
"Jack?"
"I'm not taking anything down until after Christmas next year!"