Unsaid Sentiments
Yugao
Summary: He never said, "I love you."
Author's Note: I don't really know why I wrote this. Maybe it's just to celebrate my new penname (remember Laereryn? … Yeah), or maybe it's to make up for whatever I can't say. In any case, this Neji and Tenten oneshot's been written, so please read and review. I hope you enjoy it.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
He never said, "I love you."
Not even in jest, when they were children in the Konoha Ninja Academy. He was never one to kid around, anyway, unlike his more boisterous classmates – he was always so serious, so dedicated to his studies and his training. It was because of this mysterious, enigmatic sort of allure that all the girls in his class seemed to fawn over him.
She was the only exception. She was never giggling every time he spoke, nor was she tittering with excitement every time he looked her way. She was always intelligent, skeptical, and it was because of this that they always sat together in class – or, rather, he sat there, and he let her sit next to him. He was always silent, no matter how hard or long she tried to coerce words or reactions from him. She never succeeded in breaking his silent oath to himself to never let himself open up to other people. Undaunted, she never gave up trying.
Not even after they graduated from the Academy together, having proven their worth not only to Konoha but also to each other. The day before the final test, she wished everyone in her class good luck. She faced each and every one of her friends and earnestly said to them how much she hoped they'd pass. But when she came to him, she said nothing. She knew he didn't need the luck to pass.
There was no secret wishing between them that the other would qualify to become Genin. They knew, though never admitted, that they were more skilled than to resort to wishes. They were above that. Still, they were relieved at putting their doubts to rest and finding they had passed together.
Not even after they were placed on the same team, along with another one of their classmates, Rock Lee. On his part, he was glad to have had her on his team, having seen before the way she fought and the way she acted in situations that called for split-second decisions. He was relieved his teammate would be able to look in more directions than his own. And though he never said this out loud, his actions implied it.
She, on the other hand, laughed at his relief and his reasons for it. She never said out loud that she thought it was mildly interesting that he preferred her company to anyone else's.
Not even throughout the Chuunin Exams, when they both spent countless nights of sleeplessness on the training grounds. She had already lost, and was still hurt both physically and emotionally from her crushing defeat at the hands of Temari. Yet, she had offered to help him. He never asked for help, he was too proud to. But she insisted, and in the end, he relented.
They stayed together, beneath the sun and white, puffy clouds; or beneath a stormy sky; or beneath the moon and the stars. The weather did not matter much to them. Rain or shine, the two of them trained together, having little mercy on themselves. They knew that it was only with sacrifice that he was going to leave the Chuunin Exams with his head held high.
Not even when he woke up from his near-comatose state after the Sasuke retrieval mission. It was just past midnight when finally he came awake. He was stricken not so much by the bare whiteness of the hospital walls, but by the fact that she was there, asleep as she rested her head against the foot of his bed. He tried to sit up, but found that his arms were too numb to let him do what he wanted.
He contented himself by thinking that she had been sick with worry waiting for him to come back to Konoha, waiting for him to wake up. He knew how hard it must have been for her to wait – though she was gifted with almost infinite tolerance, she had little patience. He knew that just by leaving, he'd caused her the greatest kind of torture.
Not even during the years they'd spent together. They'd been on countless missions, went through life-threatening battles. They knew each other's weak spots, and they constantly came to each other's rescue. If, perchance, in the heat of battle, he would turn and check to see if she was all right, he would scold himself. He learned a long time ago that though she praised his genius, she was just as skilled. Then, he would return to his opponent with the knowledge she was fine.
And yet it was not only on missions that they knew each other. They were each other's confidants, the keepers of each other's little secrets untold but known to them. They knew their nuances, their idiosyncrasies, and those distinct little things that made them who they were.
Not even when she spoke those three little words the first time. They had been walking together on one of those rare, peaceful moments in Konoha. Perhaps it was the sweet after-rain mist that hung in the air. Perhaps it was the almost ethereal shower of cherry blossom petals onto the bridge they were crossing. Perhaps it was their rippled reflections on the clear surface of the crystalline water. Whatever her reasons, she spoke in a soft, near inaudible whisper with a blush tingeing her cheeks.
He had been taken by surprise. He had not expected to hear her say what she did, and knew not how to react. He said nothing, only took her by the hand and led her across the bridge. The conversation was never continued in words.
Not even when finally, after years of waiting, he asked her to marry him. They were back at the same bridge they'd been years before, where she told him how she felt. The cherry blossoms were not in bloom, having only just shed their flowers. Still, the place was beautiful to them as he finally asked her.
Then, it was she who was taken by surprise. She had never thought he would muster the courage, or even the emotion, to ask her. But he did, and her reply to him that day was a deep embrace, and a muffled, tearful "yes" buried in his shoulder.
Not even in the celebrated ceremony with which they were wed. Everyone they knew and loved had come to see them, to wish them congratulations and good luck. They cast knowing glances at each other. They knew they wouldn't need the luck. What they had was more than enough.
It was the first time she had seen him so happy. His smile wasn't as wide as many of those in the congregation, but there was a softness in his clear eyes that was strange but beautiful to her. She was touched by his sudden display of feelings, and struggled to be the best she could be, if only for him.
Not even when their first child, a son, was born. The boy had a strong semblance to his father, even at birth. He had dark brown hair, and the clear eyes passed on by the Hyuuga clan. His skin was pale, and his smile small but winsome. She loved the boy beyond measure, as did his father.
But she knew there was one, distinct difference between the man she loved and his son. When the child was old enough to speak, his first words were, "Love you." She almost broke into tears at that, but instead she held the little boy close for the emotions his father withheld.
Not even when she was sent on a mission that almost ended her life. He learned the Hokage had sent her on a battle against S-Class criminals. He waited for her. Each day he would stare longingly at the gates, hoping to see some sign that she was about to return. He knew, then, exactly what she had felt when he had been sent on the Sasuke retrieval mission, when he saw her being assisted through the gates. He ran to help her, not wasting a single breath.
He waited, he watched, he felt the same gnawing terror that he would lose her. He never said it out loud, but it was what he feared the most. He sat there at her bedside; all the while praying to whoever would listen that she would live, that she would survive. He wasn't used to seeing her lie there, broken and weak. Her smile had always been his source of strength.
Not even when, more than a year after she recovered, she bore their second child, a daughter. The girl, this time, took after her mother. Her eyes, though still her father's, held her mother's childlike curiosity and wonder. Her hair, only just beginning to grow, looked to be brown. They loved her no less than they loved their son.
He noticed that once again, she took out from hiding the hair ties she had long since abandoned in her maturity. He smiled at the thought of watching her brush the child's hair lovingly into a pair of buns, the way she used to wear hers – but it wouldn't be for a long time yet.
Not even as they watched their children grow. Their son they sent to the Academy they used to attend. Their daughter, too, would soon follow. She looked on, partly in her motherly love, and partly in her surprised bewilderment. Was it possible that all those years had passed? Wasn't it just yesterday she was there in the Academy herself, when she first met him?
He noticed the strange sadness that had settled in her, and took her in his arms as he had so often used to. He whispered words of comfort, and she found solace there once again.
Not even that last night, that last night they spent cradled in each other's arms. Winter had come, and they passed silently as nightfall does.
Though all throughout their lives, Hyuuga Neji never said, "I love you," Tenten always knew.
Author's Note: I can't even write this author's note because I'm laughing too much with my drama. Haha… please review? I'd really appreciate it, and maybe it would calm me down a little. Thanks, love you.