The hiss of the sliding sand was the only thing that filled the air, and Link was becoming fairly irked at the sound by now. He was currently sitting cross-legged in the vestibule of the once-prison, the entrance to the Arbiter's Grounds a foot behind him as he stared into the darkness of the sandpit before him.

It had taken him the better part of two hours to travel the distance from the mesa to the place where the sages resided. And as an added bonus, he had run into yet another poe in the stable where he had battled that large bulbin with horns. Digressing a moment in his contemplations, Link still could not figure out how that beast had survived being knocked off a bridge not once, but twice—granted, the Great Bridge of Hyrule was directly above Lake Hylia, so it was entirely feasible that he had fallen into the lake, much as he had when the Lanayru providence was still under the shroud of Twilight; but the Bridge of Eldin was overlooking a gorge, with no such body of water to break ones fall: the horned monster shouldn't have even been able to survive the fall into the gorge, let alone manage to scale its height!

And such, Link, after having traversed the enemy encampment directly outside the prison—for which he was insanely thankful that he had taken the extra time to eliminate all the sentries on his last visit, when he still had access to his bow that had been gifted to him by the gorons—and came to his current predicament.

He had been sitting here for the better part of the last hour, occasionally staring at the rusted grating that he had used his clawshot to latch onto during his first visit after attempting to wade the sands fast enough and merely climb onto the block—that was a very bad idea, he had discovered, much to the amusement of Midna.

Okay, let's review what hasn't worked so far, Link thought to himself. Groveling and apologizing to your shadow to appease your pissed off companion has had no success. Calling out to the sages for help, on the slim chance that they might get their masked asses from the Mirror Chamber did not work—the lazy old bastards, Link thought bitterly to himself with a scowl. Cursing at the top of your voice, while a great method to vent anger, didn't help. The hero lifted his hand to the bridge of his nose and pinched it to nurse the growing migraine that had developed. And even when I do find a way to get the door across the way, I'll still need the spinner to ascend the spiral mechanism leading to the room where Zant confronted us.

I wonder if the heroes of the past had to deal with shit like this? Link thought idly, but then again, he was fairly certain that he could bet safely that he was the first so far to enrage their companion by staring at the chest of a taller-than-them fairy. Even when she does forgive me for that, Link thought, knowing that such a thing would not be for a very long while, knowing the slightly sadistic nature of the female imp, she'll never let me live it down.

Just then, his stomach gave a growl, causing the Hylian to glance down at it. "That's right…" he said to himself, "I haven't eaten for a while now have I?" Sighing aloud, he got up from his spot and turned about to exit the room; he was certain he could convince the bulbin to "share" some of the bulbos they had roasting on a spit—after all, he was could be very persuasive, he had found, when possessing the right leverage (usually in the form of a few feet of gleaming Master Blade).

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Link tore off a strip of meat with his teeth, not at all minding the slain marauder right next to him, which was staring up at him with vacant eyes and a bloodstained rictus grin. The meat, if the truth be told, he thought was not bad at all: slightly tough and salty in texture and taste, though it was a bit overdone in terms of roasting.

Swallowing, he reached over and cut another strip from the flank of the boar, setting down the unsullied blade of one of those he had slain. He was staring at the upside-down animal whilst he chewed the meat in his mouth, when suddenly he stopped as an idea came to his mind.

No, he thought, shaking his head. That is totally and completely insane, but nonetheless, he continued to stare at the slaughtered animal that had served as the catalyst to his current brainstorm. Slowly, he swallowed the masticated meat in his mouth and continued to stare thoughtfully at the source of his dinner. But there'd have to be one of them still alive for it to even work….

Getting up, Link shook his head in self-disgust. "I cannot believe that I'm actually going to do this," he muttered to himself. Then, glaring down at his shadow, he uttered, "Look at what you've forced me to do: engage in a suicidal, half-baked scheme," and then wandered back into the stables, the first light of dusk beginning to crest the horizon.

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"This-wasn't-smart-this-wasn't-smart-this-wasn't-smart:" that was the mantra that the hero clad in green continually uttered under his breath as the bulbos charged up the steps leading to the entrance of the Arbiter Grounds, which he had propped open using a tall piece of rubble. Link was fervently praying to the goddesses as the pig he rode upon charged through the portal, and continued on—only to find that it had nothing more to continue its charge upon, as the ground had suddenly vanished upon it running off the edge.

Link quickly threw himself off of the bulbos and to the left, pushing off its flank as a counterforce, and closed his eyes as he awaited his impending doom; and he idly wondered if he would die from being suffocated by the sands first or by the mounting pressure of the sand around him once he sunk. Several seconds passed, a frantic keen filling the air, and Link slowly opened blue eyes and dared look upon realizing that he was, in fact, not sinking.

"I cannot believe that actually worked…" he muttered to himself in shock, seeing that he had indeed landed on the stone isle that he had been aiming for; the squeals of bulbos were finally silenced as it sank beneath the ravishing sands of the room. Taking a moment to steel his nerves—and making a silent promise to donate half the rupees he had to the church upon his return to Castle Town—he easily hopped across the more easily accessible platforms among the sand, briefly pausing upon seeing the brazier of lantern oil for a moment before he remembered that he hadn't access to his lantern.

Walking with a purposeful stride, he passed through the large atrium of the prison, the four blue-flamed torches flanking him on either side as he ascend the central stairs, and into the chamber with the spinner mechanism and the gaping pit of sand beyond. Stopping at the edge, he raised his head and stared towards the top of the spiraling stone that he knew housed the spinner-track used to reach the top. Luckily for he, Link had thought of a way to circumvent the necessity of the apparatus of ancient technology—albeit, it would be a very slow and dangerous one.

Resigning himself to his course of action, knowing that there was no other way, he backed up to the doorway of the room, readying himself, and then sprinting towards the sand and leaping at the lip. Descending from his leap of faith, Link's fingers scrambled at the stone spinner track, managing to find purchase, and then he very slowly pulled himself from the sand he had begun to sink into, and straddled the track. Leaning forward, he wrapped his arms around either side and looked towards the top: now would begin the long process of shimmying to the top of the structure.

"When all this is done," he promised his self as he clenched onto the track with a death grip and inched along it as a worm would move, "I am going to use all these nice, shiny rupees I have to buy myself some serious therapy…."

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Some time later, he had not bothered to keep track of how long, Link finally stepped into the Mirror Chamber, his face ashen. You know how people always give the advice "And whatever you do, don't look down"? Well, he had decided to ignore that very good piece advice about halfway to the top of the stone spiral.

The large black monolith stood rising from the stand before him, positioned directly in front of the resting place for the shattered Mirror of Twilight, and Link wondered if he should take this time to return the two pieces he and Midna had recovered from the mansion of Yeto and Yetta, and the Temple of Time, but the five sages suddenly appeared before him.

"Greetings, chosen one of the goddesses," the Sage of Light said, stepping forward and bowing slightly in respect. "Have you and your shadow companion retrieved the three fragments already?" he inquired, his mask with its perpetual expression tilting in askance.

Link scratched the back of his head and smiled sheepishly at the robed quintet. "Not yet," he admitted. "We still have to find the one that lies in the sky…. The reason I'm here is that I'm wondering if you and your fellow sages would be able to transport me back to the mainland of Hyrule—outside of Castle Town, preferably?"

The sage stared at him in what Link could only assume to be a bewildered manner, and slowly nodded his head. "That is within our powers, hero… However, why do you simply not have your Twili friend do so for you, if we may ask?"

Link was silent at the question; there was no way that he was going to tell the five most wise men in all the realm that he had gotten into hot water with his female sidekick for staring at the goods of a freakishly large fairy. "She's…" he began slowly, "not too happy with me at the moment… and I would greatly appreciate it if I could leave it at that," he spoke cautiously.

The Sage of Light was silent, but he nodded nevertheless. "If you so wish, hero; though, I pray that you mend the rift between the two of you, or all shall surely perish to the shadows," he said, gesturing towards Link to step into the center of the ring that the sages had formed.

Doing so, Link watched as they silently bowed their head in concentration, uttering an ancient tongue upon their breath, then raised their arms to the heaven, and a bright flash of light enveloped his visor.

Hissing slightly at the shock of the light, Link rubbed frantically at his eyes to further speed the return of his sight and dispel the spots dancing before his vision. As the world cleared, Link noticed that the desert that shades of desert that had filled the horizon for the past night had given way to hues of green. Looking about, he found that he was in fact in front of Castle Town.

His spirit soared at his freedom from the arid dessert, but it was tempered by the fact his hitherto constant companion would not speak to him. Reaching down to his wallet, he hefted it, hearing the jangle of countless rupees within, and decided upon his course of action: he would visit Telma—she was a woman, right? Plus she owned a bar, so he was certain she had dealt with similar problems before from boyfriends who had come to drown their sorrows after angering their—

Link stopped and blinked at that train of thought. Boyfriend? How had that thought even entered the analogy in his mind? Midna, by no means, was his girlfriend—hell, at the best of times she was only just friendly in tone with him. Of course, that is not say that he resented her—her sarcastic demeanor and dark sense of humor had grown on him, and he found them to be endearing traits.

Wait—"endearing?" Shaking his head, Link started across the drawbridge and into the town to seek out Telma.

…But first, he would stop by the church.