A/N: This was originally meant to be a One-Shot but has mutated into a short story. I haven't finished writing it yet but there are currently seven parts waiting to be posted on my computer. Please review!!

Synopsis: When one stupid mistake threatens Jude and Tommy's marriage; Tommy finds himself struggling to regain his wife's trust and love.

Part 1: Pain

She dropped her keys on the table in the foyer and called up the stairs; "Tommy? Are you home?" She heard a thud and footsteps scuffling around on the floor above her as she shrugged off her coat and hung it in the closet.

Slowly she made her way up the stairs, pausing to smile at the pictures of her and Tommy on their wedding days that lined the wall alongside the stairs. She was happy. She'd had a great day at the studio and was looking forward to spending a nice relaxing evening with her wonderful husband.

Her feet made almost no sound as she padded down the carpeted hallway, "Tommy?" She called again. Noticing muffled sound coming from the guest bedroom she ventured toward it. "Are you in here?" She pushed the doorway open and stared at astonished horror at the scene in front of her.

"Jude," Her name was a desperate and breathless utterance from Tommy's lips as he took a tentative step toward her.

Her mouth fell open as she gazed from him to the woman across the bed from him, buttoning up her shirt and refusing to meet Jude's eyes. Tommy was shirtless and wearing a pair of old jeans. His mouth opened and closed like a dying fish gasping for air.

Jude turned and fled. Her footsteps were still strangely silent as she raced down the hall. Like a child after a fight with her parents she sought the comfort of her bedroom, ignoring the fact that it was his bedroom too. Him, the man who'd just betrayed her with a woman she didn't even recognize.

She silently threw herself down on the bed, an arm covering her eyes as she gasped for air.

Tommy had followed close behind. He'd expected her to slam the door in his face, to lock it or push an item of furniture to block his entrance and was surprised to find the door half open.

He slowly ventured inside, preparing for a verbal onslaught of anger or distraught tears.

He gazed at Jude's still form on the bed. "Jude, I-" He couldn't find adequate words. He put a hand to his head and kicked the wall, wincing as pain coursed through his foot.

Jude hadn't moved.

"I'm… I'm sorry." He whispered, "I didn't mean for this to happen. I didn't…" Again words failed him and silence settled over them.

He took a few steps closer to the bed, still anticipating her to whirl to face him as she screamed bloody murder.

She didn't move.

After nearly ten minutes of silence and his pointless and pathetic words he moved to stand by the side of the bed. In frustration he pulled her arm away from her face, hoping to see her expression to know something of what she was feeling toward him in that moment.

Emotionless blue eyes met his momentarily before she rolled to face away from him, her arm once again falling to hide her face.

A broken sigh escaped his lips as he slowly sank to sit on the bed. He gazed out the window at their back yard. Jude had spent weeks planting flowers and trees, placing tiles and creating the beautiful outdoor setting that now gazed back at him accusingly.

The realization of the true consequences of his actions was only just starting to dawn on him. His actual actions were only just starting to dawn on him.

He'd been about to cheat on Jude. Had she not arrived home at the moment she had there was no doubt in his mind that he would have actually cheated on her.

His head sank into his cold hands as mind screamed self abuse. Who was he? What had he become? How could he have willfully caused such irreparable damage to the most important thing in his life; his marriage?

He glanced over his shoulder at the still form of his wife. She was the dearest thing in the world to him. Someone he'd always valued over his own life. He would die for her and yet less then half an hour earlier he'd done something that was the equivalent of stabbing her in the heart with an icy knife.

He'd hurt the person he loved the most.

He sat silently, gazing blankly out the window as darkness settled over the room. The feeling of self loathing that had overtaken him was fierce. He didn't deserve to be breathing right now. He should be buried six feed under the dark, damp earth for the heartless act he'd almost committed.

He didn't deserve this beautiful house he lived in, he didn't deserve the comfortable and safe life he took for granted and most of all he didn't deserve the wonderful, talented, beautiful and kind woman lying on the bed behind him.

He didn't even notice the sun dip behind the horizon. Hours had passed when he finally snapped from his daze and glanced about him. He slowly stood to his feet and groped his way along the wall in search of a light switch. A moment later the room was bathed in a dull light as he blinked against the pain it caused his eyes.

Pain.

He deserved the pain.

He crossed to the other side of the room, gazing at Jude. Her chest rose and fell as she breathed deeply. He could tell she was asleep.

Kneeling on the edge of the bed he reached across and gently moved her arm away from her face. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her lips turned down as her face betrayed the restless sleep she was experiencing.

He pulled away as if the sight had hurt him. He dropped her arm as if her skin had burnt him. He turned away from her, gasping as physical pain coursed through his chest, constricting his heart.

He had to fix this. There had to be a way… some way that he could repair the damage he'd done.

Somehow…

He placed the palms of his hands against the cool wall, resting his head against the cream wallpaper.

What had he done?

Preview for Part 2: Desperate Conversations

"Every time you touch me my skin crawls!" She found her voice and the words spewed out, the only thing betraying the emotions beneath her calm exterior, "I never understood that expression but now I do. It's as if that part of my skin wants to detach itself from my body and jump down the garbage disposal!" She gasped for air, her breathing, her words coming out in jagged gasps, "I can't breath when you're near me," She took a few steps back as if to illustrate her words. She backed into a table and leaned against it as if she couldn't stand without the additional support, "I can't… I can't look at you."