Prologue

Our story begins as Link wakes up. This is always where the story begins. Always, always, always. If we heed no other part of canon, we shall heed this.

Link woke up. "Mghwrhf," he muttered, eloquently.

"Hey!" chirped a voice, entirely too cheerfully.

"Mmph?" Link muttered, rubbing his eyes.

"LISTEN!" it shouted.

Link managed to squint in its general direction, expecting a little glowing dot. Instead, he found himself staring at a girl of approximately fifteen, who, though glowing, was not the same thing.

"What the crap," he muttered, blinking.

"HI," she said, in all caps, "My name is Princess Rhianna Cassandra Ariella Guatemala Bolivia Argentina Florentina, but you can call me Mary Sue. I'm here to tell you all about absolutely everything! You're going to go on a grand adventure!" She giggled, clapped her hands together, and a shower of sparkles exploded into the air.

"No," Link mumbled. "Going to go back to sleep. Bad dream..."

"Teehee! No, you're not, silly!" she exclaimed. "You're going to journey through a variety of exciting and potentially dangerous lands as you search for... well, something," she giggled. "I'm not sure what! Anyways! On your journey, you will travel through the many lands of FAN FICTION!"

"The many lands of what?" Link said.

"Hee!" She giggled again and tossed her gleaming, sparkling, shining hair over one shoulder. "Every day you will travel through a different realm of fan fiction. If you survive them all, you win!"

"Win at WHAT?" Link said, irritated.

"Win at... life and coolness!" she improvised. "omg, let's totally begin! Are you so totally ready?"

"NO," Link said.

"That's too bad!" glittered Mary Sue, and she snapped her fingers.