WAYS TO ANNOY ERAGON!!!!
A/N: I have to say, I love Eragon. Especially now that I've seen how hot he is in the movie! ;) I only annoy out of love for a certain fandom, so just keep that in mind. And if your gonna read this, go on and review it, will you? And all people who say really mean things to me will be voodoo-ed.
1:
Always point out the similarities between the Eragon books and 'Lord
of The Rings.'
2: Even stupid ones like, "OMG! Your name has
an E in it and so does Legolos's!"
3: Start out every day by
going over all the stupid things he's done and conclude with "so,
the stupider you are, the more people die. So try not to be an idiot,
kay?"
4: Loudly sing 'Save a Dragon, Ride a Rider' all the
time.
5: Ask him 'How the heck did you get blond?!"
6:
Lock him and Murtagh in the same room.
7: Take bets on who will
kill the other first.
8: Say "OMG! Eragon, Angela has told me
the most important prophecy of all!" When he asks what it was,
say "Oh, I forgot."
9: Shout out random made up words
and insist you've said something in that magic language. When Eragon
demands to know what that spell was supposed to be, grin and say
"it's working."
10: Buy a fluffy cat. Paint it blue. Get
rid of Shaphira. When Eragon asks where she is, present the cat.
Insist you don't see anything wrong with her.
11: Tell him that
Shaphira left him to go be with Thorn.
12: Tell him that Shaphira
is cheating on him.
13: Ask him stuff like "so, doing magic
drains your energy? What happens if you cast an energy spell?"
14:
Say "it sucks that Arya turned you down. Maybe if you weren't
such a loser she would love you, too." (I know he's not a loser,
but who cares?)
15: Send him a picture of Arya and her new
boyfriend. Force him to look at it constantly.
16: Should he try
to kill you, unleash the fan girls after him.
17: Or say "now,
now, little Eragon, don't drain all your energy!" And then pat
him on the head.
18: Tell him you ate Shaphira.
19: Try to
teach him spells from Harry Potter.
20: Write Eragon/Murtagh fics.
You know you want to...
END NOTES: Thanks for reading! If I get any reviews, I'll update (hint, hint). I'm thinkin' of annoying Murtagh next. )