Author's Note: Whoa! Sorry for not updating in a looooooooooooong time! I've been super busy! But here it is! A CHAPTER 3! For those adoring fan that love the angsty hot smut and smex that is the twisted yaoi love that is Kadaj/Reno. However this chapter is Rude/Reno and Rufus/Reno and is simply filler to keep you in my clutches so that you will read on to the good stuff to come! MUAHAHAHAHAAAAAaaaaaaaa...ahem.. ;; Anyway! Enjoy!
Song used in this chapter: Fade by Staind
.-Chapter 3-
Reno emerged at the edge of Midgar beaten and bloody, limping feebly towards the overpowering Shinra tower meekly. He coughed and sputtered leaning against a wall for support while the metallic taste of blood came to his lips. His head spun with Kadaj's flavor. He jolted away from the wall holding his head with the bone spitting agony that overdosed his system. His battered form fell into the street where an oncoming car honked and screeched on it's brakes towards him. Looking up from the ground Reno was a deer caught in the headlights.
---I try to breathe
Memories overtaking me
I try to face them but
The thought is too much to conceive...---
Something crashed into him but it wasn't the car. It pinned his all ready damaged body to the pavement making a groan escape from his lips.
"Reno!" A loud yell came to his ears as it tried to help him up. He opened his black eyes with a wince and stared dumbly at the bald tower of a man above him. "Aibou! Speak to me! It's gonna be ok yo!" Rude was in a panic, he didn't even seem to care that his sunglasses were off.
"Rude..." Everything hurt.. Black and red dots danced on the edges of the Turk's vision. "Make it stop... please.." He whispered letting a tear escape. The redhead never cried for anything but this was too much. He just wanted it to end. For the world to stop spinning... to just...
His partner didn't shoot him. He hoisted him up over his shoulder and carried him to a parked black company car quickly letting Elena drive off once they were both inside. Reno laid his head back trying to fall asleep. Rude wouldn't let him. He kept telling Reno to stay awake. To talk. Why did he want to talk at a time like this..? What about later... later was...
"No! No! Reno! Look at me! Come on keep focused! You have to tell me where Kadaj is. Where is his gang? Come on buddy what happened to you?" Rude forced his partner to stare into his eyes. They were filled with worry and fret.
Reno pulled away and stared out the window. "What I've been through? What he did to me...?" He shook his head staring darkly out the window, "You don't even want to know." His gaze shifted from pain to hate and something more... something not Reno...
"Ren..." Rude murmured to him to which he shot a nasty glare back.
"Don't call me that." He snapped at Rude.
"Reno... hey we didn't know where you were.. We had no clue! We tried to-"
"YOU COULD HAVE TRIED HARDER!" Reno yelled at his partner. "Why did you leave me?! WHY DID YOU FUCKEN LEAVE ME?!?!" Reno grabbed Rude's collar and shook him slightly. He released him when his body hurt too much to do anything more. Slumping against the back seat he panted roughly, his heart pounding in his ears. His hands trembled as he faded into himself, cradling his head in his hands, trying to suppress tears.
Elena shot a look to Rude through the review mirror as their hotheaded, stubborn, cocky and fun-loving partner cried for the pain to end. His tears were too much for even Rude. He turned away while Reno's body wracked with harsh sobs that were stifled by the bearer's palm. He was finally letting it all go, all those built up emotions he had held for nearly a month... He needed this..
The black car drove on. Elena told the both of them the hospital was close but Reno shrieked and pleaded no. He had to go see Rufus. Rufus was the key to all of this. If he didn't do as Kadaj told him... Reno simmered down when the car veered towards the Shinra tower. Elena shook her head.
"You need rest Reno. You need time to heal." She eyed him in the review mirror.
"I need to see him." The redhead repeated.
Rude sighed. "It's no use Elena. He's dead set on it. Just drive."
Reno's eyes flickered momentarily in the sunlight. Rude blinked and decided it was just that, the lightingnothing more. Relief had washed over him at the sight of his partner, then jumped to his throat a second later while the car headed straight for him. The worry over Reno was far from over. He glanced over to the redhead who's tears were now silent as his eyes stared numbly out the window.
---I only know that I can change
Everything else just stays the same
So now I step out of the darkness
that my life became 'cause...---
Reno stepped out of the car and limped towards the elevator that would lead him closer to getting back at Rufus. Rude grabbed his arm to help him but Reno pushed off him in a feeble attempt to get away only to fall to the ground after the brief loss of balance. He winced hitting the pavement hard staying there a few moments before pushing himself up and making his way slowly to the elevator.
"Reno… come on let us help you." Rude cooed offering his arm as a support.
Reno glared at it, "Why..? So you can say you did something and finally not feel guilty? Fuck off.. I don't need your help. I didn't need your help to escape why do I need it now?" His tone was spiteful as he moved to hold the rail in the elevator.
Rude's hand dropped and he eyed Reno. This wasn't like him.. Was he really that mad? "I… Reno.. I'm sorry…" He pleaded. The redhead ignored him and focused on not throwing up as the room spun harshly around him while the elevator made it's steady climb up to the 86th floor of ShinRa Tower.
---I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me
To express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made---
Reno walked into Rufus's office without an introduction from the secretary. He didn't care if Rufus was being bent over his desk by Tseng or whatever, he needed to fulfill is orders from his new master. Kadaj…
Rufus jumped as Reno slammed the doors and locked them in Rude and Elena's faces.
---So where were you?
When all this I was going through
You never took the time
To ask me just what you could do---
Rufus's eyes stared in awe at the mess of a Turk before him. He stood and moved around his desk a few tears coming to his eyes. "Reno….. Oh my god…. Reno!" Rufus's soft voice carried through the empty room. Reno panted heavily leaning to the one side staring at Rufus.
"I…. I hate you.. Fuck you Rufus! I hate you!" Reno gave him a death glare that would stop a barking dog and send it whimpering with it's tail between it's legs.
Rufus looked down sighing.. Why was he so surprised to see Reno? He knew… He knew Reno would be ok and pull through… "Reno I…"
"Shut up! Just shut the hell up! Do you have any idea of what I've been through?! Did you ever once try to find me?! AM I JUST SOME FUCKING TOY TO YOU PEOPLE?!?!" Reno was seething. Rage filtered through all of his features as his hands clenched tight enough to break the skin on his palms into little crescents.
---I only know that I can change
Everything else just stays the same
So now I step out of the darkness
that my life became 'cause...---
Rufus swallowed and looked down. He had no answer for the Turk. He deserved this and probably far much more. What was there to say? Productivity and other missions needed to remain priority. There had been countless searches for Reno but no one could trace him. The microchip in his earring used for tracking him down had gone out of range and the one cell phone call they had gotten through on had been too short to follow.
The moan Reno sounded over the phone in that call had haunted Rufus. It snaked its way into his dreams, seductive and raw. If Reno like getting fucked like a whore then why didn't he stay with Kadaj? Rufus wanted to hear that moan again from Reno's lips as he bent him over the desk just behind them. God did Rufus want him… Reno's anger snapped him out of his flight of imagination mercilessly.
"Why the hell did you guys leave me there! Damn it Rufus if I didn't love you so god damn much I'd kill you in two seconds!" Reno yelled looking away. He froze and covered his mouth in horror at what he just said. He let it slip.. in all his anger he said the one thing he promised never to say.
"You what?" Rufus blinked in amazement. Did he just hear that correctly? "You love me?"
"No! Shit! Fuck no! I… I… Damn it!" Reno pounded his fist against the wall.
"Reno…" The president inched closer to the battered man before him. "Reno it's ok.." It was like coaxing a tiger, Reno limped away onto the couch his legs couldn't handle it anymore.
"Fuck off! You.. You don't get it! You don't understand!" He was babbling.
---I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me
To express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made---
"Reno.." The president knelt in front of him. "You should really go to the medical ward. I'll take you ok?" His voice was gentle and it was lulling Reno to sleep.
"No! I.. I.. I need to… t—AHHH!!" Reno held his head in his hands and curled away from Rufus, the pain from his injuries and the cells that Kadaj had forced into his system sent flashes into his mind, a sharp pain nearly too harsh to bare.
---I never meant to fade...
Away...
I NEVER MEANT TO FADE!---
"Make it stop.. god make it stop!" Reno's strangled whispers leaked out into the room as he tried to stifle down tears.
"Reno…" Rufus leant close to him with an out stretched hand. Reno shuddered as it brushed a trace of tears that fell down his bruised cheek. The hand pulled back slightly before Rufus's arms wrapped around his battered Turk. A tiny gasp escaped Reno while Rufus breathed whispers to him.
---I just needed someone to talk to
You were just too busy with yourself
You were never there for me
To express how I felt
I just stuffed it down
Now I'm older and I feel like
I could let some of this anger fade
But it seems the surface I am scratching
Is the bed that I have made---
"Ren.. It's ok.. Let it out Ren, it's ok.. I'm here for you. I… I'm here.." Rufus hesitated briefly while Reno's head buried itself in his shoulder and his body shuddered fiercely under the pressure.
The Turk's sobs were quiet at first; soft and held back while the redhead bit his lip against them in protest. Rufus's arms pulled him close, tracing in up and down his spine soothingly.
"It's ok Reno… I love you.." Came the blonde's hushed reply.
---I try to breathe...---