"You have to go" insisted House
"They're your parents" reasoned Wilson
"They're your in-laws" pushed House
"House' griped Wilson
"Just because they don't KNOW they're your in-law doesn't mean you have to act like you're not their son in-law" chided House
Wilson gave House a level look; House batted his blue eyed lashes in response
"Come on Jimmy, meet the parents" sweet talked House
"Well I guess this is a good excuse to get a free meal from you" sighed Wilson
House leaned in and nuzzled the spot in between Wilson's neck and shoulder
"That's not the only good thing you'll get, out of this. There's always dessert"
"I'm watching my figure" teased Wilson embracing House in the hallway next to the front door.
"I'll give you something to watch" resting forehead to forehead House slowly began kissing Wilson from the cheeks down to his collarbone, causing Wilson to groan in response.
"You promise to behave?" asked Wilson causing House to stop his procession of kisses.
"I always behave" grinned House, reaching his arms around to pull Wilson closer into him.
"Oh alright, just don't do anything. For all your parents know I'm just a friend of yours at dinner" Wilson was finding it hard to think with House up against him…
"Great, get our coats" ordered House suddenly, pulling away from Wilson, House started toward the door.
"When is this dinner?" asked Wilson slightly baffled by Houses sudden response
"Uh started about five minutes ago at Lea Minor, you didn't think I was going without you, right?" House held open the door as Wilson walked out rolling his eyes.
"Is there anything I should be prepared for, when meeting your parent?" Wilson asked tentatively
"Uhh" responded House
"House you can't send me in there unprepared!" whined Wilson
"I might have told them I was in a relationship" mumbled House
"What, with who? Me?" asked a startled Wilson
"No, no. I never specified who, I let them assume a nurse" replied House
It was only a five minute car ride to the restaurant, but because of pouring rain and traffic it took them more then fifteen minutes to arrive.
"There you are Gregory; your mother was getting worried. I see you brought your friend Dr. Wilson" said Mr. House standing to shake Wilson's hand
"Oh you can just call me James sir" nodded Wilson while shaking hands and taking his seat
"We've heard a lot of good things about you James" smiled Mrs. House
"Why thank you Ma'am" nodded Wilson
"Have you guys already ordered?" asked House getting straight to the point
"Just drinks we thought we would wait and see if you showed" Silence spread for a moment as father and son exchanged a glance, Wilson expected for House to make a snarky comment, but was surprised when none came. Things were turning out rather well during the entrée and for a moment Wilson actually thought they would get out of there without any complications, but he hoped too soon.
"So two crème brulee's and four cups of coffee?" asked the waiter holding up their tray of dessert"Yes, one for James and one for me" explained Mrs. House
"So Greg tell us all about your new love interest" gushed Mrs. House
Wilson shot House a nervous look while sipping his coffee
"Oh she is amazing mom, the best one yet" smiled House
"What's her name dear?" asked Mrs. House
"Uh, Jenny Willman" improvised House
Wilson was starting to feel uncomfortable, but tried to focus on his crème brulee.
"What does she look like, is she pretty?" asked Mrs. House while stirring her coffee
"She has brown hair and eyes and…she is very pretty" smirked House, Wilson shifted uncomfortably
"How did you two meet?" asked Mrs. House
"At work" replied House simply
"Did you like her right away?" quizzed Mrs. House unaware of Wilson's discomfort
"Well no not right away. I thought she was a snob at first, but she kept pursuing me with her big doe eyes, finally guilting me into a date. You know how that feels don't you Wilson?" teased House, ignoring Wilson's annoyance
"Something like that" mumbled Wilson, kicking House under the table
"And you're happy you decided to go out with her?" wondered Mrs. House
House paused looking between his mother and lover, a desperate look crossing Wilson's face, it was hard for House not to reach out and hug Wilson, reassuring him with a kiss but House kept his distance, slowly inching his hand over Wilson's thigh giving him a light squeeze while answering "I couldn't be happier"
"Well tell us more about this Jenny Willman?" poked Mrs. House
"She is smart and beautiful, but has the tendency to whine and she gets into moods sometimes" House punctuated this by groping Wilson under the table causing Wilson to sharply intake breath. House kept his eye's straight ahead not giving away that he was man handling Wilson possessively.
"Sounds a little spoiled to me son" House was giddy at the indirect jab, Wilson felt the need to defend "her" himself, but was finding it difficult to think…"It's not like your without flaws" breathed Wilson trying to grab Houses hand, and make him stop stroking him.
"Let's cut through the niceties son, is she any good in bed?" demanded Mr. House Wilson started choking on his coffee, while Mrs. House yelled at her husband for being crass. "Honey!"
"What we're all adults here, that's how you can tell if something's going to last" Mr. House defended
House turned to check on Wilson who was rather red in the face, House was having fun with this and it suddenly occurred to Wilson that this was the reason he had conned him into going.
"She is better then good, and I'll leave it at that" Wilson looked like he was going to pass out, but Mrs. House took Wilson's look as meaning he felt left out in the conversation.
"So James have any love interest of your own?" she asked politely
"Um, yeah but nothing to really talk about" laughed Wilson nervously, he had to get his breathing under control but it was hard to do while trying to push away Houses roaming hands, finally Wilson resolved by holding Houses hands down, clamping them together in his hands. "Behave" whispered Wilson
"Oh now she can't be that bad?" prodded Mrs. House
"You have no idea" gasped Wilson wrestling Houses hands under the table
Now it was House's turn to be uncomfortable "Well my girlfriend is sort of like a coin, she acts one way in public and completely different in private" said Wilson
"She sounds two faced to me" stated Houses father, Wilson grinned "And manipulative" added Wilson to an annoyed looking House"She'll do anything to get her way" continued Wilson, ignoring Houses hands squirming in his.
"Well that's not good" pointed out Mrs. House "What are her good qualities James?"
Wilson was just about to respond when a waitress came behind Wilson and House, she was all smiles, as she looked down at their hand holding. "I just wanted to say you two are the cutest couple" gushed the waitress, both Wilson and House froze, eyes widened in fear. "Oh thank you sweetheart, we've been together 50 years" bragged Mrs. House not realizing the waitress meant the boys. The waitress looked slightly confused, looking between the four of them. "Check please" interrupted House
"One of her best qualities" continued Wilson "she can perform under pressure" smiled Wilson, squeezing Houses hand affectionately.
LATER THAT NIGHT
"That wasn't so bad" admitted Wilson lying beside House in bed.
"That's only because I distracted you" bragged House
"Your distractions almost got us caught" argued Wilson
"Admit it you love my distractions" challenged House snuggling up against Wilson's back. "I admit nothing!" smiled Wilson trying to look serious.
"In that case I'm going to sleep" huffed House turning away from Wilson, in a sudden quick motion Wilson flipped House over onto his back positioning himself on top of House, leaning forward face to face, "I think it's your turn to be distracted" whispered Wilson smothering House with a kiss. "We should have dinner with my parents more often, I enjoy these distractions" gasped House just as Wilson turned out their bedroom light.