Erm…I decided to re-write this chapter. After I was hit with writer's block at the worst possible time, I knew that I'd done this all wrong. I guess this is more of an alteration than a complete re-write, since most of it is still the same, but I have decided to move the story along in a different way. Sorry for the overdose of italics, the constant complaining and the terrible original writing…

Thanks for reading (If you've kept up with me this far, then you are all my motivation!) and reviewing. You guys are the best.

Chapter Six: Tears

"Goddammit, I wish she hadn't brought that up. The past is the past, so why can't she leave it be? I'll never stop thinking about it, but I don't need to be fucking reminded whenever it's convenient." Dee growled to himself on the way back to his room.

The private one-on-one session with Dr Carol hadn't gone as planned. Usually, she asked Dee how he was, and if he'd had any experiences he'd like to talk about, or any concerns. Sometimes she sympathised with him, other times she gave him advice. In fact, Carol was the only psychiatrist that Dee trusted completely. He thought that she understood him. She'd had a hard life herself, and was no stranger to pain.

"I know I can't forgive myself, dammit, but…I don't deserve that privilege. I promised. I promised him I'd grieve forever, that I'd pay for my mistake…" Dee punched the wall nearest to him, not caring when pain registered in his hand. He ground his teeth together, remembering the conversation he'd had in the session.

"Now, Dee. I'm going to be asking some different questions today, and there's something else I want you to know, so please listen, okay?" The young psychiatrist kept her face free of emotions as she spoke softly to the dark-haired teen.

"Yeah, alright." Dee shrugged, thinking nothing of the situation.

"First of all, how do you feel about having a new room mate?" Dr Carol sat up straight, her long hair falling past her shoulders in two large plaits.

"Ryo? I guess it's okay sharing a room with him. I mean I was a little pissed a first, but…"

"Language, Dee. And, how do you feel about this Ryo?" Dr. Carol began to tap her fingers on her lap, a sign of nerves as she wondered how this conversation would turn out.

"What are you implying there? Ryo's okay, he's a good guy. And there's no denying he's cute and all…" Dee noticed the psychiatrist's posture. 'Why the hell is she nervous, I'm the one answering the stupid questions?'

"Alright…and does he remind you of anyone…?" At this, Carol looked to the floor. Her dark green eyes unable to look at Dee for that question.

"No. Should he?" Dee replied nastily. He hadn't expected that. Not from Dr Carol at least. "Is it even your business to know what I think of him anyway, Cal?"

"I'm sorry. But Dee, you know all too well about the incident two years ago…" Carol sighed. She knew Dee was angry now, and of-course she had expected a reaction like this, but she needed to know what Dee thought about the McLean boy.

"You don't bring that up again! Okay? Jeez, what is this all about, huh? We both know that I wasn't allowed a room mate after that. But now I've got Ryo, and everything is fine." Dee snapped.

"Just listen to me for a minute, Dee. I don't think it's fine. And I don't think you're fine. Don't tell me you can't see the resemblance. I think Ryo reminds you of him. And that guilt that you can't seem to get rid of is eating you on the inside. Slowly but surely, if you don't forgive yourself and get over it…"

"If you don't forgive yourself and get over it blah blah blah." Dee imitated his psychiatrist as he finally got to the door of his room. He pushed it open harshly, finding J.J sat comfortably in Drake's lap, with Ryo asleep in bed.

"Dee-Sempaii!" J.J smiled happily at the other teen's return.

"Shut the fuck up, J.J. Both of you out of my room, now." Dee fumed, heading over to his bed crossly.

"Dee…? What's up…?" J.J asked, keeping a little distance from him. He knew that confronting an angry Dee was like facing a wild, unrestrained animal. Keep your distance, or get hurt.

"OUT!" Dee growled, making Drake jump up. J.J took his partner's hand, scared at Dee's inflamed temper. Obviously, something had put Dee in this terrible mood. And J.J would bet everything he owned on it being the session with Dr Carol.

"Alright." The lavender-haired teen whimpered, like a hurt puppy. He pulled Drake along with him. Before the pair completely left Dee and Ryo's room, Drake shot a quick glance at Ryo. His eyes softened, and his forehead creased in worry. Perhaps they should have woken Ryo up and warned him. Dee didn't have patience in the best of situations, but he was even more likely to snap now.

"Damn it…" Dee sighed, sitting with his back against the wall, his long legs hanging over the bed. "I really need to cool it."

"…Dee…" The voice was so soft, almost like a forced whisper.

"Hmm?" Dee frowned. All the shouting must have woken up Ryo.

"Is everything okay…?" Ryo risked a glance at Dee. His cheeks were slightly red, and his eyes were narrow green slits.

"Just go back to sleep, Ryo." The dark-haired teen was not in the mood for conversation. It would be better tomorrow, when a new day signified another new start.

"Don't you want to talk? It helps when someone is willing to listen." Obviously, the shorter boy hadn't caught the signals Dee was giving off.

"Not now. I'll see you tomorrow, ok? Night." Quickly turning his back to his inquisitive roomie, Dee stared at the blank wall, hoping sleep would soon whisk him away, and when he opened his eyes, things would be better again. 'Better, but never back to normal. Nothing can ever go back to how it was…'

"Dee…something happened, didn't it…?" Ryo tried again. He wanted to talk to Dee. "Can you tell me?" Dee's shoulders slumped.

"Why can't you just drop it, hmm?" Dee sighed. "It's none of your business, so stop prying."

"I only want to help you." Ryo sat up, his dark eyes pleading with Dee, wanting him to understand his intentions.

"Oh sure. If you could help me, you wouldn't be in this nut house yourself. How the hell can you help me? You can't even help yourself, dammit. And I don't need your pity, or any optimistic crap. In case you haven't noticed, it's all downhill from here."

"Dee!" Ryo got out of his own bed, his headache having finally cleared. "What happened to make you think that way? It's like you are an entirely different person to the Dee I met before. Did your session not go so well…? I'm here to listen, okay? Please don't shut me out."

"Heh…" Dee chuckled darkly. "Maybe the Dee you met wasn't the real Dee. Ever thought of that?"

"I refuse to believe that." Ryo shook his head. "I don't know why you're here Dee, and I won't pester you if you don't want me to know, but I am here. I'm stuck here, just like you. I've got my own problems to deal with."

"Ryo. I have a lot on my mind right now. When the time is right, maybe I'll feel more willing to talk but for now, just drop it, alright?" Dee could feel himself drifting slowly away. '…It's almost as if his voice chased my anger away…' He thought tiredly.

Ryo looked at his room mate, laying still on the bed, his body tense, and his hair flopping over his face.

'The third side of Dee. The vulnerable teenager. Under all that anger, he's really just like me. Just like me…' Ryo mused, watching Dee attempt to get uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry." Ryo smiled sadly. "I'm sorry, Dee." The sandy-haired boy leaned over his partner's figure. "And…I forgive you." Ryo's pale hand stroked Dee's head, his long, thin fingers running through the tussled black strands of unruly hair. "I forgive you, Dee Laytner."

At those words, Dee froze. His eyes moved to meet Ryo's dark orbs. The half-Japanese teen was still smiling sadly. His cheeks shone silver in the dim light.

'H…he's crying…' Dee realised. 'But…?' The dark-haired teen chuckled lightly. "Dolt. You don't even know what you're saying. And look at you. Crying at your age, man."

"Well…you're crying too." Ryo giggled, his hand brushing the crystalline tears away from emerald eyes.

"Oh shit." Dee cursed, looking down suddenly.

"You mean, no shit." Ryo teased, pulling his hand away from Dee's face. "I…I better go to bed. It's group therapy tomorrow morning, and we have to be up and ready…"

Impulsively, Dee grabbed Ryo's arm. He pulled the smaller boy down on top of him.

"Dee?" Ryo panicked, his breath catching in his throat.

Their lips were barely centimetres apart, and Ryo could feel Dee's breath ghosting over his mouth. He was almost tempted to lower himself and kiss the gorgeous teen below him, but he daren't move. Maybe Dee wanted to kiss him?

"Thank-you." Dee whispered, before slowly turning away from his roomie to lie his head comfortably down on his pillow. Ryo blushed, almost ashamed to feel disappointed along with his confusion, anxiety and relief.

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Three knocks daintily tapped on the white room door, before it was flung open.

"Berkie!" A shrill cry made the figure sat down on the bed jump. "Did you miss me?"

"D…Diana?!"

"Awh, I bet you did…oh…there's that look again. What is it?" Diana swiftly joined her childhood friend, her brightly patterned skirt contrasting heavily against the thin white sheet neatly framing the bed.

"I'm not sure…" Berkley sighed, running a hand through his thick, blonde hair.

"Well, there's definitely something on your mind. You have that look of concentration!" Diana laughed, looking sweetly innocent before her blue eyes became deadly serious. "So, start talking."

"There was someone in my room."

"What?" The teenage girl saw a little confusion in her friend's eyes.

"At first, I had no idea who he was. He stared at me with fear in his eyes…but then I could have sworn I recognised him at the same time. But, it couldn't have been…" Berkley broke off, adjusting his glasses as they slipped down his nose.

Diana remained quiet for a moment. Rarely was her Berkley stuck for words like this. It was rather unnerving to say the least. She reached over; placing her hand on top of Berkley's before giving him an encouraging smile. "Go on…"

"I thought I saw Arnon." Berkley whispered.

"…" Diana gasped, her nails digging into the tall boy's hand.

"But we all know…" Berkley sighed, his face pale, "…that he's dead."

TBC…

XOXOXOXOXOXO

Any better? Feedback appreciated, especially if will help me improve!

Minako Angel xxx

(Don't worry; I haven't forgotten about Drake and J.J…I'm sure they'll get a bigger part sooner or later!)