A/N Ta-da! Just in time for Halloween night. The eve has never looked so fluffy.
Disclaimer I don't own it, I don't own up to it.
Blithering Bats, It's Halloween, Batman!
Part 3
"I'm sure she can't have gone far," Bruce said hopefully. "Why don't we split up. You check the rooms around the kitchen, and I'll head down the hall."
"Oh no, I wouldn't feel right poking around your house by myself," Brenda protested, tightening her grip on his arm. "Besides, I might get lost, too!"
"We can't have that," Bruce muttered. "All right, if we move quickly, she won't be able to get too far away. With a quick move, he liberated himself and began striding down the first floor's main corridor, throwing open doors and calling Macy's name as he went.
Brenda hurried after him, forced to trot to keep up with his long strides. "Macy! Macy, honey, where are you?"
They reached the end of the corridor and the door to the pool room, which stood slightly open. "Ah, I think we may have found where she ended up," Bruce guessed, pushing the door wide open and walking into the moist air. The soft nighttime lights were on, and sweet green scents wafted from the conservatory end of things.
"Oh," gasped Brenda, "what a lovely room." She paused in the doorway to look around.
Bruce continued to the edge of the pool and scanned its perimeter. A petite pink fairy was balanced on the end of the diving board. When she saw him, she waved cheerfully. Bruce turned to call to Brenda, but discovered that she had already seen her daughter, and was hurrying toward him, her eyes fixed on the diving board. As she drew close to Bruce, she tripped (at least, he assumed he was supposed to construe it as a trip, although it was really more of a lunge) on a vector calculated to throw her into his arms.
A lifetime of Alfred's influence had ingrained Bruce with some manners. He did not step aside and let fall into the pool, but neither did he make any attempt to catch her. And so she fell face first, full force into his chest – and bounced back up, neatly rebounded by the foam rubber. Bruce looked down at his costume with new appreciation.
Brenda looked dazed. "I…I…"
A shriek cut her off, as Macy, who had been bouncing around on the end of the board, lost her balance and tumbled off. Brenda screamed as her daughter disappeared with a resounding splash.
Bruce immediately dove into the pool, but by the time he reached the spot, Macy had resurfaced and was dogpaddling furiously. "You all right?"
She grinned and spouted water like broken pipe. "That was fun!"
They swam together to the edge and climbed out. Brenda knelt anxiously in front of her daughter. "Are you all right?"
Macy rolled her eyes. "Of course. I know how to swim, Mom."
The older fairy's worry melted into a frown. "Macy Joy Jordan, how dare you run off like that! Don't you realize we've gone through a lot of trouble looking for you?"
Macy looked indignant. "But Mom, you told me to."
Brenda gasped. "Macy Joy, I did no such thing!"
"Yes, you did! You said you thought it would be fun if I snuck off and ex…"
"Macy, not another word!" her mother desperately ordered.
Bruce kept his tone carefully neutral as he suggested, "Why don't you take one of my cars home, so that Macy can get dried off before the party." He called the garage from the poolside phone and escorted the dripping girl and her red-faced mother to the door. He shut it securely behind them, then leaned against the wood and laughed until his clammy, spandex-clad sides ached.
- - - - - -
Overall, Dick decided that he liked Halloween parties. They had done a number of interesting things like sticking their hands through holes in boxes to touch gross stuff and guess what it was, trying to catch apples floating in water with their teeth, and smacking a pumpkin-shaped piñata with a baseball bat.
They were split up into two teams, and each team had a scarecrow stuck up in a tree. The first person in the team was supposed to run to the tree, climb up into the tree and grab the hat off the scarecrow, then run back and give it to the next person in the team. That person had to go and put the hat back on the scarecrow. Sam and Erik, one of the pairs of twins dressed as a two-headed monster, were both on Dick's team.
"I saw the prize for the game," Sam whispered excitedly. "It's totally wicked. Candy hands that actually look real!"
"Cool," Dick agreed.
"We have to win this one," Erik said firmly.
The teams lined up, and Dick ended up on the end. The boy across from him on the other team was older and a lot taller. "Ready to lose, little bat-boy?" he sneered.
Dick scowled up at him. "It's Bat-man. And we're not going to lose."
"With shrimp like you on the team? You guys are toast."
Just then, Sam and Erik's mom blew the whistle, and the first runners sprang forward. The teams were well divided, and the race stayed even until the end when Erik, the runner before Dick, tripped and fell. The big kid across from Dick tagged his teammates hand and took off running. "See you later bat-boy!" he called over his shoulder.
Erik finally made it back to the line, and Dick tagged his hand and took off, running as fast as he knew how. Ahead of him, he could see the other boy reach his tree, but instead of climbing up like the other kids had done, he tried to jump up and grab the scarecrow's hat. He missed, and fell hard onto the ground.
Dick turned his attention back to his own tree, which was coming up fast. He waited until the last possible second, and just before smashing face first into the trunk, he jumped shooting straight up into the air. He grabbed the branch and hoisted himself up to snatch the hat, then dropped and hit the ground running. He didn't know where the other boy was, but when he sprinted with the hat past the finish line (nearly bowling over a screaming Sam), his own team erupted in cheers.
Dick doubled over, gasping, "Did we win?"
"We won!" Erik screamed. "Dude, that was awesome!"
"Wicked cool," agreed Sam. "You're fast!"
"And he jumped so high! Did you see how high he jumped?"
Dick's grin practically brushed his earlobes. The way his teammates were slapping him on the back felt good – really good, but the best part was when he looked over and saw Bruce and Alfred standing next to Sam and Erik's mom. Bruce grinned and flashed him a double thumbs up. Dick locked his hands over his head in a gesture of triumph and let out a victory yell.
Later, Dick, Sam, and Erik were swapping loot underneath one of the scarecrow trees. Erik hated Tootsie Rolls, so he was giving them away for nothing, and Sam loved Butterfingers, and would trade on a five-to-one basis. Involved in negotiations, they didn't notice anyone approaching them until a tennis shoe descended on Dick's pile of candy.
"Hey, bat-boy," sneered the tall kid from the race.
"It's Batman," Dick snapped, "and get your stinky foot out of my candy."
The other boy just twisted his sneaker, grinding the treats into the ground. "Why don't you make me, bat-boy?"
Dick jumped to his feet, hands clenched. "Maybe I will!"
"You can try," the older boy sneered. "But I bet you can't. You're as worthless as that stupid Bruce Wayne. My dad says he's just a bum who likes to get drunk and burn…"
Whatever else his dad had said was lost in an oomph as Dick's foot slammed into his stomach. He sat down abruptly, his face a mask of pained surprised as he gasped for air. Dick grabbed his sweatshirt collar and jerked him close so that they were nose to nose. "If you ever say that again, I'll do more than kick you in the stomach, you lying creep." He shoved the older boy away and bent down to scoop his candy into his pillowcase. "Let's get out of here."
Sam and Erik gave him wide-eyed looks and obeyed. They were some ways away before Sam ventured, "You just beat up Rodney Rathbone."
"He's like…twelve," Erik added in an awed tone. "Dude…"
"…you rock."
Dick didn't say anything. He suddenly wanted to go home.
- - - - - -
Alfred deposited Dick in the bathtub and returned downstairs to find Bruce raiding the refrigerator. "I trust, sir, that there is some reasonable explanation for why you arrived at the party sans costume and with your hair plastered to your head? The same reason, perhaps, that Miss Macy and her mother failed to put in an appearance at all?"
"Well, Macy fell in the pool and I jumped in after her."
"And that was why they didn't come to the party."
"Not exactly. After that, Miss Macy accidentally revealed that her mother had instructed her to run away from the group."
"I see."
"The woman literally threw herself at me, Alfred. And she bou…" Bruce started laughing and could barely gasp out, "bounced right off…of that c-costume."
The butler's eyes gleamed. "Now that, I wish I could have seen."
Bruce abruptly stopped laughing and glared. "You could have, if you hadn't abandoned me in my hour of need."
"I had hoped that you were old enough to look out for yourself."
"Yeah, well, I'm just lucky I'm still in once piece. She was terrifying, Alfred, truly terrifying."
"It is Halloween."
Bruce snickered. "Alfred," he said, sobering, "did Dick seem a little quiet on the way home?"
"Yes, I noticed it too. I thought perhaps he was somewhat overwhelmed by the evening's festivities."
"That could be," Bruce agreed, then smiled again. "Hey, how about the way he won that race? Did you know he was that fast? He beat the crap out of that older kid."
"So he did," Alfred agreed, not bothering to conceal his pride.
Bruce glanced at his watch. "I should go. I'm afraid the rest of the evening won't be quite so…enjoyable."
Alfred nodded. Halloween night in Gotham City was no laughing matter.
Bruce headed for the doorway, but turned back as Alfred called, "Master Wayne? Where did you put your wet costume?"
Bruce assumed his most innocent expression. "What costume?"
"No costume at all, sir."
"Pennyworth, you do realize you're lucky I'm not docking your salary for this? Or suing you for psychological harassment?"
"I'm most grateful, sir."
"Goodnight, Alfred."
"Happy Halloween, Master Wayne."
The End
A/N Well, that wraps it up, only three times as many chapters as I thought there would be! I hope you all got a good giggle out of it.
Trick-or-treat,
Trick-or-treat,
Leave me comments kind and sweet!
(Pleeease.)
Happy Halloween!