Title: All Come Down
Author: M Kari
Summary: My biggest fear will be the rescue of me, funny how it always turns out that way...
Rating: Adult General
Pairing: Kate/Ari
Spoilers: Set immediately after "Heart Break." Contains major spoilers.
Word Count: 1044
Notes: Neshama (Lit.: Soul, breathing, spirit. 1) and yadid (Beloved 2) are general endearments in Hebrew. Title and summary are from "Warning" by Incubus. Many thanks to cornfields and binglexjells for betareading and handholding. This is my first posted NCIS fic, and my first finished fic in over two months. Feedback is loved.

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Her hands shook, keys jingling as she attempted to unlock her door. Her fingers betrayed her, stiff and useless, the keys falling to the concrete step. She knelt, angrily brushing away a stray tear as she retrieved them. It took two more tries before she successfully opened the door.

She closed the door and leaned back heavily on it, letting the cool breeze of the air conditioning wash over her. Her head lolled to the side, eyes closed, as she breathed in serenity.

The silence of the room was broken by his soft footsteps. He smiled at her over the breakfast bar. "Caitlin, have a drink with me?"

The sound of his voice broke something in her, and she dropped to the ground in a crying heap. His arms were around her immediately, fingers sliding through her silky hair, his voice soothing her with words she didn't understand. She clung to him, short nails scrabbling against his hard chest, trying to find a safe place in a world tilting out of control.

She started to babble, her tongue running away with her words. "Ari, I killed him. I shot him, and he'd done nothing, nothing! He just…oh God, oh God. I probably sound so foolish to you, this probably wouldn't even bother you; I mean did killing Martaeven bother you? Jesus, what am I even saying?"

He sighed, tightening his grip on her body. "Caitlin, neshama, I would think less of you if you felt no grief. Come," he murmured, pulling her to her feet, "let me make you comfortable."

Kate reveled in the feel of his hands, warm on her skin, as he led her to the couch. He kissed her forehead and assured her he would be back before padding quickly to the kitchen. She hugged her knees to her chest, curling in on herself in his absence. She heard the soft pop of a bottle being opened, and he was suddenly kneeling before her, cupping her face with his right hand. "Here," he said, his voice low as he pressed a cool bottle against her palm.

Swallowing against the lump in her throat, she unfolded far enough to bring the beer to her lips. The bitter liquid slid across her tongue spreading a chill through her chest. Ari rubbed her legs, coaxing them back to the floor, and Kate into a less defensive position. "Yadid, tell me what happened."

She sucked in a ragged breath, expelling it slowly and carefully set the bottle on the end table. "He was a suspect in a murder, and we found him at his high school pool. Gibbs instructed him to lie down, spread eagle but he refused." As she continued with her story, her voice strengthened, becoming cooler and more professional as she distanced herself from the incident. "He was sitting on one of the diving boards, and he pulled out a gun. He didn't… He didn't point at us, he aimed it at his head. He told Gibbs to put down his weapon, that he'd never hurt a woman. So Gibbs did." She closed her eyes and a tear leaked out of the corner of her eye. "Everything was going by the book. Ensign Hayes lowered his weapon and they were talking. I thought he and Gibbs had started to build a rapport, that he was really getting through to him. But then…."

She breathed deeply and closed her eyes as he climbed up beside her and wrapped his arms around her. "Gibbs reassured me that I did everything right, that it was suicide by cop, that there wasn't anything I could have done. He wanted to die, and used me to do it." Tears began leaking out of her tightly closed lids and she rubbed them away with the heel of her hand. "I think that's what bothers me the most, Ari, that I couldn't have done anything different. That if it were to happen tomorrow, and I knew he didn't kill anyone, that I still would have had to shoot him. He was innocent, but Gibbs' life, or Tony's or McGee's life is more important. Who are we to decide who lives or dies? Who says we get to play God?" She lifted her face to his, eyes sparkling with unshed tears, begging for an answer.

He cradled her face between his hands, a thumb gently stroking over her lips. "Your government entrusted you with that responsibility, just as my government has entrusted it to me. We protect far more people than we hurt." She opened her mouth to protest, but he silenced her with a gentle finger. "You are distressed. You will not find your answer tonight, so rehashing the experience will only heighten your guilt." He brushed a strand of dark hair from in front of her eye. "Come neshama, I made dinner. I promise it isn't inedible."

She cracked a thin smile, and let him pull her from the couch. He kissed her lips gently, cupping the back of her head with one hand. "Or better yet, let me distract you," he murmured into her ear, his breath hot on sensitive skin. His hands slid to her waist, pulling her flush against him as he kissed down her neck. When she was breathless and needing, he tugged her easily to her bedroom. "And please, don't call me Harrison in bed."

"As if you let me forget your name, Ari," she replied, face flushed from both tears and desire.

He grinned lecherously, his teeth white against dark skin. "But I will try my best to make you forget yours," he growled as he flipped her easily onto the bed.

Three hours later, Kate wasn't sure she remembered where she was, let alone her name. Exhausted, both mentally and emotionally, she curled up against his broad chest. "Do you feel better about today, neshama?"

Sighing, she shook her head, tracing figure eights over his heart. "Not really. But I'm too tired to care right now."

His chest rumbled as he laughed. "Sometimes, that is all that we can do." He gently stroked her hair, willing her to sleep. As she drifted off into blissful oblivion, she thought she heard him whisper, "Oh, Caitlin. I wish I could keep you."