No Where Special

Takes place between Tortuga and finding Will and the heart on the island.

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Captain Jack Sparrow was not drunk. He was in his cabin, and there appeared to be an empty bottle of what had probably been rum beside him, but he had no memory of drinking it; therefore, he was not drunk.

Captain Jack Sparrow was not thinking about Elizabeth Swann. Any Miss Elizabeth Swann. Especially the one on this here boat here. Here. Not the one here, that is. Maybe Captain Jack Sparrow was a little drunk.

Most assuredly, Captain Jack Sparrow wanted to know where the rum had gone this time. It certainly was not here. He stood to recover said rum and gave a little wobble.

Captain Jack Sparrow was not wondering where a Miss Elizabeth Swann was at that very time. He was, in fact, thinking of various other concepts of interest. Like, will it rain today? And whether Gibbs has given the orders to swab the deck yet. And whether he would make port in the near future. And where that bloody rum had gone.

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Captain Jack Sparrow recovered some rum and headed back to his cabin. Captain Jack Sparrow was still not thinking about Miss Elizabeth Swann. He was not wonder what her reaction would be if he called her Eliza. He was not concerned that the pants she wore were much too masculine for her lovely, womanly frame. He was not thinking of how her hair held the seawater better than his, and he was, most defiantly, not wanting to see her.

"Jack," Elizabeth walked over to her captain who looked, in her professional opinion, quiet drunk. "Jack, are we headed in the correct direction? Gibbs is ranting about how we have no heading."

"It's the Caribbean, love. We never have a heading." Jack smiled and wobbled passed her, catching the scent of her hair as he passed. Seawater.

"Jack, where are you going with that rum?" Elizabeth asked, watching him, suspiciously. Having a drunken captain was almost never a good idea. Though, she supposed, since this was Captain Jack Sparrow, it would probably be worse to have him sober.

"No where special, love." Jack suddenly spun on Elizabeth and she had to step back as he put his face close to her's. "Would you care to join me? After all, no where special is not special in any case, though if it were shared by someone of a more feminine attitude, if you will, then the non-specialty of said no where might actually wear off, therefore forcing it to become, as all else, more of the said special." He smiled, "Savvy?"

Elizabeth backed up and waved his breath from her face. "No, Jack, it is not 'savvy'. I'll find you later, when you are less intoxicated." She said and he looked at her for an explanation. "Drunk, Mr. Sparrow, when you are less drunk." She told him and began away.

"Ah." Jack said, then called after her, "Well, if ever you feel the need for no where special…" Elizabeth smiled as she walking into her cabin.

"I'll make sure to give you a yell." She assured him, closing her door.

Captain Jack Sparrow took another swing of rum. He was still not drunk.

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Well? Reviews if it was good or if it stunk? Unsigned welcome…