"Come here to gloat have you?"

"No I haven't actually, I've come to see if you're okay."

"I'm fine. I think it's all lovely that you guys are together. Best of luck."

"Harry, we need to talk. I know you still love her and-"

"I DO NOT LOVE HER. I NEVER loved her. She…she's just a friend. Just a friend.

"Harry…"

"Just piss off why don't you? I don't need this. I'm with her for a whole year and all of a sudden-this happens. Can't you see I need some space?"

"I…yeah. Yeah I'm sorry. Sure Harry." Ron's head disappeared from behind the door and the door closed. Harry sank back in the armchair. He needed out. He jumped up suddenly and ran upstairs to his room. He grabbed pen, parchment and ink and headed for the owlery. It was deserted.

Dear Snuffles,

Hermione and I are over. She has feelings for Ron still and now she knows that he returns them they are going to be together. He paused not knowing what to say. It's the Christmas holidays soon, as you know, and I was wondering if I could come and stay with you, wherever you are. Do not write. Common room. One. Thursday. Please try and be there. Lupin is fine and sends his love.

Harry

He rolled up the parchment and Hedwig fluttered down from her perch. He tied the roll of parchment to her leg and watched her fly out over the trees of the forbidden forest and out of sight.

The rising sun was shining on the lake, glinting in a peaceful and calming way. Harry found that his remorse was all gone. Somehow writing to Sirius had made him feel totally relaxed. He sat there and watched the sun come up. The grounds were a beautiful sight and the early morning air was crisp and moist, filling him with oxygen and warmth. It was only when he saw Hagrid stumping out from his cabin up to the castle, presumably for breakfast that he made any move. He got up and headed for the great hall, careful to avoid meeting anybody on the way. He did not feel like talking with anyone just yet.

He grabbed a stack of toast and was heading out of the great hall again when he head somebody calling his name.

"'arry! Hay, 'arry, over 'ere!" It was Hagrid.

"Hiya Hagrid. How are you doing?"

"Yeh I'm grand 'arry, grand. How are yeh doin'?" Harry looked at him calculatingly. Hagrid was certainly not stupid.

"I'm alright." He saw Hagrid's expression. "Really. I know it's surprising but I feel okay."

"'s'not easy but yeh'll be fine. Honest yeh will. It'll hurt for a bit but in the end yeh'll be fine."

"Thanks." Harry strode out of the great hall. There was a pretty girl with a sheet of long, blond hair outside the door.

"Hey Harry, need some cheering up? I hear you and Hermione split up."

"No…thanks but no thanks." He should have known. Now all the girls would want to be 'The girl who mended Harry Potter's broken heart.' Bit of publicity for them. He ground his teeth and headed for the common room. He would wait for Sirius' reply before he did anything else.

Harry stretched. He had clearly been asleep all day. The embers in the fire were dying and there was nobody in the common room. Sirius! He checked his watch. It was one o' clock but there was no sign of his godfather's head in the fire. He sat back, painfully disappointed. It was strangle how much Sirius meant to him. Of course, he was the closest thing Harry had ever had to a parent and Harry felt an immense gratitude towards him for that. But it was more than that. He liked Sirius. Sirius understood him and always took steps to make him feel more comfortable. Sirius was a refuge away from teenage angst. He was a man, not a boy.

"Harry."

"Sirius."

"Listen I haven't got long. Yes you can come and stay. Take the train and Tonks will pick you up. Can't wait. Got to go now, I'll explain another time." And he was gone.

"Wotcha Harry."

"Oh, hi Tonks…erm, nice hair. Where is Si-Snuffles?"

"Shh. Come with me. No he's not at Grimauld Place, don't worry, he's fine." Tonks' hair was deep black and spiky with violent white-blonde streaks. She was wearing dragon hide clothes. If Harry hadn't known her better, he would have said she was a punk rocker. He followed her out of the station and along a disused railway track until they reached a deserted watch station.

"Perfect."

"Tonks…Sirius doesn't live here does he?" Tonks laughed.

"No Harry. Floo powder," she whispered and handed him a handful. "Step in and say 14, Sim Green."

"Okay…well…bye." They kissed cheeks and Harry threw the powder in the fire stepping in and shouting '14, Sim Green.' There was a whirl of green and suddenly all he could se was fireplace after fireplace whizzing past his vision. He closed his eyes. It was only when he felt himself slowing down when the opened them and threw out his arms to break his fall-and fell straight into the arms of his godfather. They embraced. Harry felt all his misery about Hermione that had grown since his meeting with Sirius slip away.

"Harry. Welcome." He looked around him. It was a cosy room. There was a large bed in one corner with a few chairs and sofas around a crackling fire. Through the two doors off the room, Harry could see what appeared to be a little kitchen with a small, dragon-shaped table that Harry recognised from Grimauld place. Through the other room was a bathroom but Harry could not see much of it.

"It's small but it's nice. Can't have anywhere too imposing, even though I've got the gold. They might find me if I did that. Do you want to stay here? I'll sleep on the couch but it's still quite small-"

"It's perfect." Sirius looked relieved. "Right, well dump your trunk right there as a cushion for the next person who comes to visit us and come and have some butterbeer with me." They walked into the kitchen as two butterbeers came zooming out of the fridge at Sirius' request and into their hands. "You don't mind if it's from the bottle? I'm not too great at these washing-up spells." Harry laughed and they collapsed onto the couch. "So Harry, how are you feeling?"

"Well…for a long time I felt crap. But since I got here I've been pretty good. You're very good at cheering me up."

"Am I?" said Sirius, raising him eyebrows in a flirty way. Suddenly he coughed and looked away. After a few seconds he asked;

"So you think you'll be okay?"

"Yes. I am over her if that's what you're saying. I only feel crap sometimes because of the betrayal of a friend, you know?"

"Yeah I know," said Sirius, smiling, "and it's good that you're over her. It won't hurt so much. You've had rather too much hurt in your life to need any extra." Harry gave a hollow laugh. Too right he had. But he felt pretty good all the same, sitting here with Sirius and letting him know that he was over Hermione. He didn't know why but that relaxed him.

"It's natural that you feel betrayed Harry. So…got any plans to get back together with Malfoy? Or…or with somebody new?"

"No. Is there a reason you want me to get together with Malfoy or-?"

"-No I just always saw you more as…well…you know…homosexual." Sirius blushed and then looked away sharply from Harry again. Harry's brain was fizzing. He didn't think we was supposed to feel these sorts of feelings for him godfather. He stretched out and saw Sirius' eyes on him. It was his turn to blush and look away.

"So…are you going to give me the grant tour or what?" Sirius jumped up.

"Yeah sure well…this is the living room as you can see which doubles as a bedroom. And though here is the kitchen, obviously, and here, my pride and joy, the bathroom. A shower, a loo and a sink lined the walls of this room. But in the middle stood a hot tub with a large swimming-pool-like bath, a bit like the one in the prefects' bathroom, dominating the room.

"Wow."

"You like it? It's very extravagant but I like it." He smiled and they returned to the couch and carried on talking late into the night. It was only when Harry told Sirius that he was a laugh and Sirius blushed and looked away down at his watch that they broke off.

"Shit, it's quarter past twelve, you must be exhausted." Harry realised for the first time that Sirius was right. He stood up and swayed, feeling all the blood rush from his head.Harry smiled backHthe two Sirius leapt up and steadied him.

"Thanks. Am I sleeping here or in the bed?"

"Oh you're in the bed. Go right ahead, I'm hitting the hay too." Harry walked over to the side of the bed. He suddenly felt embarrassed. He turned away from Sirius and stripped off his t shirt. He threw it on the floor and stepped out of his shoes. He sat down on the bed, to pull of his jeans and socks when he saw Sirius watching him. He had clearly looked up at Harry while he was changing because he was leaning over and had no shirt on. Their eyes locked.

"Harry…" The word was torn. Harry stripped off his jeans and boxers, suddenly feeling supremely confident.

"I've been sitting on that sofa for eight hours pretty much and I know from an aching butt that it is the most uncomfortable sofa ever. I'm sure the bed it way more comfortable."

"Harry no. You're the guest and you're having it."

"Okay. Tell you what, we'll share it." Sirius looked up sharply.

"Harry I…do you mean it?"

"Sure."

"You're on. Hang on a sec though." He stripped off to his boxers and made towards the bed. As he passed Harry, their skin touched and a shiver ran up and down Harry's neck and back. As he shuddered, Sirius turned to look at him, concerned.

"Are you cold?"

"No, no, don't worry I'm fine."

"Here." Sirius climbed into bed and held out his arms for Harry. Harry paused and then climbed in after him, turning his back on him before wriggling backwards towards him very slowly. He was very hard. His back touched Sirius' chest and the two men let out a gasp that was barely audible. Harry wondered if Sirius had noticed the stiffness in his pants before he realised Sirius was just as hard as him. He pushed back very close to Sirius, knowing that this would emphasize the already apparent errection and heard an intake of breath. They lay there for a long time, tense and silent, neither daring to relax or speak. Finally Harry spoke.

"Sirius would you rather we were apart? I'm warm now if…"

"No! I mean sure if you like but I'm happy with the seating arrangement if you are."

"Well yeah I am but I think this way is more comfortable." Harry pushed back closer to Sirius, stretching his chest and shoulders at the same time and pressing his arse into Sirius' cock.

"Harry…I…I'm your godfather. I'd feel like I was taking advantage of you in some twisted incest-linked way if…if…"

"But you're not my family. Not by blood anyway." Harry was desperate to prove to Sirius that he wasn't drunk or out of his senses. He as perfectly aware of what he as doing and he liked it and he wanted more.

"No, Harry I'd feel bad about James. No, Harry, listen. James and I had a short affair when we were seventeen, just like you are now. I was one of the best times of my life but it nearly split James and Lily up. I don't want to fuck up you're life like I nearly did to James." Harry turned to look at him, willing him to understand.

"Sirius. I'm not in a relationship and certainly not in a serious one like my mum and dad. I've been with guys before and I…I really don't like thinking of you as a godfather anymore. Don't think of me as a godson think of me as…as my dad."

"But you're not your dad."

"No. But just for this one night Sirius, pretend I'm James. For me. Please." Sirius hesitated, and then held out his arms to Harry. Harry pressed his body to Sirius'. Sirius was warm and very much a man, not a boy. Harry loved his warmth and his voice and his skin. He wanted to touch every part of Sirius, to feel Sirius touch every part of him. He turned around slowly in Sirius' arms and their eyes locked. Sirius lent towards him and kissed him very gently. Harry opened his mouth to say something but instead drew Sirius' warm tongue into his mouth. The feeling was exquisite. Sirius' tongue explored Harry's mouth slowly and teasingly. He wrapped his arms around Harry's body and drove one hand into Harry's hair. The kiss deepened and the two men lay there, kissing and kissing until Sirius broke off and drew in a long breath.

"Wow Harry."

"Sirius…" Harry pressed his body tightly against Sirius and put his face next to Sirius'. He had always liked Sirius having a bit of stubble. Sirius moaned and pressed his cock even harder against Harry's. The feeling was incredible.

They stayed there for a long time, feeling each others breath on their necks and their bodies pressing against each other. Finally Harry relaxed into Sirius' warm solid embrace and they fell asleep.

Harry awoke to a soft breeze on his neck. He tried to turn over but found he couldn't. He opened his eyes. Sirius' hair was spread out, smooth yet tangled across the pillow. His chest was rising and falling regularly and his muscular arms held Harry tightly to him. The memories of the night before came flooding back and Harry smiled at his godfather. He leaned down and kissed his lips gently. Sirius' eyes fluttered open sleepily and he smiled at Harry blearily.

"Morning. Are you a dream?"

"Yes, yes I'm a dream."

"You are Harry aren't you? Not James?"

"Yes I'm Harry." There seemed no point in denying it. Sirius flipped Harry onto his back and lowered himself gently onto him. As the full weight came down on him, Sirius collapsed onto him kissing him so hard that Harry felt his lips bruise. Is legs were wrapping around Sirius' hips and Sirius was grunting in appreciation. Harry squeezed with his legs and Sirius let out a long 'mm' sound. Harry arched his back and bucked his hips and Sirius' kisses became more urgent, more broken.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you really a dream?"

"I…well no I'm not actually."

"Oh god Harry I'm so sorry, I"-

-"Please don't say that. Please don't say you're sorry. I loved it. It was…" But Sirius was getting up fast from the bed, he was standing, he was walking towards the end of the bed. Harry leapt up, sprinted on the bed to the end and jumped, landing on Sirius back with his arms around his shoulders. Sirius fell to the floor and Harry lay on him, panting.

"Please Sirius, not for you. For me." Sirius shook Harry off him and sat, cross legged on the carpet, still wearing his jet-black boxers. Harry sat in the same manner, his own red boxers uncomfortable and restraining.

"Harry. You have to understand what you're doing. I'm thirty-six. I'm nineteen years older than you and I refuse to let you tease me. If this is what it's going to be then you have to completely understand what you are doing."

"Sirius, I…"

"No, Harry. I am going to have a shower now and then you and while we are apart I want you to think very hard about this.

Sirius collapsed onto the couch, towelling his hair. He took a very deep breath. Calm, Sirius, calm. He's just a child. But he wants you. But I have to be responsible. He's seventeen; he's old enough to know… I can't do this to him. He's as old as James was. Harry will be in the shower now. All wet. No. I can't do that. I'll wait for him to come out of the shower. Sirius leaned his head back and stared at the ceiling, wondering…

Suddenly he felt his bathrobe being pushed aside and looked down in time to see Harry take him into his mouth. His head swam in shock as all the blood rushed from his brain into his cock. He couldn't help it. He arched his back and moaned and Harry pulled all the way up his shaft, sucking, licking, teasing, "yes, oh…" He came, hard and shot into Harry's mouth. Harry licked the cum and then ran his tongue over the head. Sirius groaned and pulled Harry up onto him. He could see how hard Harry was and wanted to satisfy him. He lifted him and unceremoniously threw him onto the bed. He tossed himself onto the bed, onto his front as well and heard Harry immediately scrambling to straddle him from behind.

He felt Harry's cock at his entrance and felt himself grow hard, despite his recent orgasm. Harry held Sirius' cock in one hand and pulled himself into him with the other. Sirius bit the sheet in sheer ecstasy as Harry entered him, feeling him pull back and then shooting forward again towards the bundle of nerves he knew he would find at the end. Harry was bent low over him, his chest rubbing against Sirius' back. He was now fucking him so hard that his hand was sliding up and down Sirius' cock of its own accord. Harry hit the bundle of nerves and Sirius screamed into the mattress. The two men came together.

"Harry we need to talk." Harry looked up at his boyfriend, surprised. They were lying at opposite ends of the couch, their feet touching.

"About what?"

"Well, it's not exactly normal for a boy of your age to have a relationship like this out of school, still less with your godfather and I…I