Disclaimer: The usual rants about the show and all the characters therein not being mine apply.

A/N: Starts with "I Get A Sidekick Out of You" and continues from there. I tried to stop myself from continuing, honestly I did. Resistance, apparently, really is futile.

Cautiously she peered over the rim of the glass, confirming what she wished to deny.

It wasn't him.

She grabbed another glass from the tray and thought only for a second before handing it across the table.

Christopher-not-Luke. Somehow, over the course of the evening those words had blended and merged into one. She tipped back the glass, avoiding the look of concern etched across his features. A bubble of anger curdled in the pit of her stomach.

She stood up, wincing as the metal chair screeched across the concrete and wobbled slightly before lacing the back of her hand with salt. She stared at Christopher-not-Luke, downing her drink with one swallow. Though the lemon chaser was bitter and brought tears to her eyes, she refused to look away.

He tilted his head and pursed his lips, just sitting there, watching her. And it was driving her crazy. Her muscles tensed and then, just as she was ready to pounce, to make him do something, anything but just stare, he did the unthinkable: he laughed.

The laughter was oddly contagious. It started with a snort and evolved to a giggle because of the snort (which was oh so lady-like). From there it was a short progression to a full-fledged chortle.

She grabbed another tequila.

Christopher-not-Luke raised his eyebrow and then his glass, parroting her actions as he tipped it back and swallowed. The liquid swirled in the glass and was gone, leaving only a bead of moisture glistening on his lips.

She teetered unsteadily and took a step away. The steps that followed were made unthinkingly until she found herself up on stage gazing down at her friends and neighbors in all their wedding finery.

Normally she would've reveled in the spotlight but today it felt wrong. Today was Lane's day and Luke was gone and Christopher-not-Luke was still watching her. She shifted her view away from him, feeling repulsed by the part of her that wasn't completely repulsed.

And god, she wished that Luke-not-Christopher was the one seated at the shot glass drenched table because then she could finally tell him all the things that had been building, piling up inside her like the crest of a flood threatening a poorly built dam. "Swoosh!" she murmured, "There goes the Teton dam."

Damn. Yeah that was it. She was damned. Damned for her sins, for wanting too much, the flowers and the dress and the twinkle lights glowing on a wedding ring. She blinked as a stray cast of light caught the edge of Lane's diamond and glinted up at her.

It took a long time for her brain to catch up with the words spewing from her mouth and when it did she felt sick. She couldn't believe the level of pathetic the woman standing on the stage had reached. She was jealous… of Lane's happily ever after? And as she was dragged away in humiliation she wondered who the woman speaking had been. It sure as hell wasn't her.

As the music picked up, she swirled away from the pitying glances, feeling nauseous and hating herself. She needed to get away.

For two scant seconds, reason governed and she began to point her toes in the general direction of home, but Jose Cuervo had other plans. Jose-not-Lorelai, she giggled and then twirled towards the camera just as a pinch faced Rory and Sookie moved to grab her. In the full thrall of alcoholic stupor, she sashayed and formed a moue and declared the two coolest people in her life the most uncool super party people. And when he slipped behind her, she closed her eyes and rested against him.

For that fleeting moment she was convinced that it was Luke and that everything, the last few months, had only been a delusion. The moment passed and she pulled away, cringing. Christopher-not-Luke; again.

Though she knew it was wrong, she didn't resist as tucked her tight against his side and began to lead her away. It would be okay. Rory was there. Rory was leading them home.

All she wanted was a place to lean when she could no longer stand alone.

Alone sucked. Alone was what she was always going to be.

As they snaked past the table, she snagged the final glass and with a glance toward the diner whispered, "Cheers."

...TBC