Disclaimer: This one came out of nowhere while reading RAINSTORM by Gunman. I really enjoy the fan fics he/she writes especially the omakes, they make my laugh so much. Sorry, that's the first time I've put my ramblings in one of my disclaimer, but I guess that's another good use for them. Right, on to the story, MOVING ON! WARNING: May contain Out Of Character situations and course language.

Shinji finally snaps.

"WAKE UP BAKA!" Asuka shouted throwing Shinji's bedroom door open. "GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF BED AND MAKE MY BREAKFAST!"

'Just once! Is it too much trouble to make your own breakfast just once you redheaded loudmouth?' Shinji grumbled for the 1000th time since Asuka moved in with Misato and himself. '"And don't forget my lunch either you baka!"'

"And don't forget my lunch either you Baka!" she shouted from her own room.

"It's Saturday Asuka! And keep the noise down! I've got a hangover!" came Misato's annoyed voice from the living room where she'd again drunk herself into a coma, as usual.

'Gee, I wonder why Misato? Could it be because you drink too much night after night and still drink in the morning!' Shinji grouched sulking into the bathroom to relieve his bladder. 'I must be the only person in the world to be stuck with psycho German roommate and a alcohol driven guardian,'

After washing up Shinji made his way into the kitchen to prepare breakfast for himself and the other three occupants of the apartment, making sure Asuka's was better than his own or Misato's. If he didn't Asuka would go into what Shinji now called "The Pride Speech" yammering on about how she was the better pilot compared to Rei, himself or anyone in the world, saying how fortunate he was to be in the presents of someone so talented and beautiful. Of course how could anyone miss the part where he wasn't worthy to kiss the ground she walked on or being called a pervert just for looking at her bare arms? How could anyone forget about that? But when Misato started her now famous "beer chugging and cheer" ritual, that's when Shinji began wondering how much longer before she died of liver failure. And knowing his guardian's second job as a part-time stunt driver Shinji knew she was invincible.

"Good morning Shinji," Misato yawned opening the fridge for her first beer of the day.

'What's good about it, crazy woman?' he wanted to say so badly, but instead he went for his usual. "Morning Misato," not turning away from preparing Asuka five star breakfast.

"Where's my breakfast Baka, I'm hungry!" Asuka shouted yet again dressed in denim hot pants and loose tank top.

"Then make it yourself Asuka," Shinji replied, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"What was that Third Child?" Asuka asked, having trouble understanding what she heard.

"I SAID MAKE YOUR OWN FUCKING BREAKFAST YOU REDHEADED LOUDMOUTH! I'M NOT YOUR PERSONAL SLAVE!" Shinji shouted right in her face, leaving her in shock.

"Shinji!"

"OH SHUT THE FUCK UP MISATO! YOU'RE JUST AS BAD AS SHE IS!" Shinji roared, swatting her can of beer across the room.

"Just what in the hell makes you think you talk talk to the the great Asuka Langley Soryu like that?" Asuka asked getting up from the table.

"Oh I'm the great Asuka Langley Soryu! I'm the best just because I pilot a real Evangelion! YOU'RE A FUCKING BITCH THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE!" Shinji snarled smacking her across the face with his fist.

Disclaimer: Sorry for ending the chapter like this, I'll try making a better chapter two. See ya.