A/N - Well, we finally reach the romance and now my kind reviewers are saying it has all happened too fast - after 21 chapters! I admit, I had to laugh at the irony especially as some readers were expressing doubt that it would ever happen at all not long ago. Well, I can only write the story that is 'there' and hope others enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it down. Thanks for all your encouragement and comments, you are all really very kind and generous.

Chapter Twenty-Three

all my desire is before thee; and my groaning is not hid from thee.

Psalm 38:9

If she had had time to think about it, Sennett would have realized how absurd it was to be engaged to a man she had never even kissed. That was just Silas, though. He would no more try to kiss a woman he wasn't engaged to than he would stand on his head. Perhaps in one part of his life when he was a very young man but not any more.

Sennett found herself being thoroughly kissed after she said yes, however. It was about that time that she realized Silas most definitely had a 'past'. It amused her that this man who had led such a strict ascetic life had such a deep vein of ardor.

It was also around that time that Silas realized staying under the same roof as his now-fiancé was going to be harder than he could have anticipated. Kissing her was one thing but he wanted to do far more than kiss, particularly when he got the searing response that he did. It was like something that had been asleep within him for over a decade suddenly came ragingly to life, like a sleeping tiger. He immediately recognized the danger.

They had kissed so long and so deeply, that Sennett felt quite dizzy. She was too weak for such strong passions still. She was more than willing but her flesh was too weak. When Silas finally lifted his mouth from hers, she went white and would have fallen if Silas hadn't held her up.

"Sennett! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have… I'm so selfish!" he berated himself, as he led her to an armchair to sit down.

"Rubbish!" she said with a breathless attempt at airiness, "I wanted to kiss you too, you know."

That was still the part that amazed him.

"You need to get well again. That has to be our first priority," Silas said sternly, more to himself than to her.

"I will. I just need to rest for two or three weeks," Sennett said cheerfully but her voice was weak.

"You need to go back to bed and rest," Silas directed gently.

Sennett nodded tiredly. She got so tired of having to rest, instead of living.

Later that day, Silas received a reply from the Abbot.

Dear Brother Sils,

I was so glad to hear from you. I was worried to find your place empty on Thursday morning. All the brothers have been concerned, hoping you are well and safe.

As Sennett has probably revealed to you, I met her some months ago while she was visiting Prague. The first moment I saw her, I realized the reason for your inability to settle into the Abbey. Your feelings for her are only natural, Sils.

My disappointment is purely selfish, Silas. We will all miss you.

Here, tears stung Silas' eyes.

I am sure Brother Paul will be happy to extend excellent references to any farm that would be lucky enough to obtain your animal husbandry skills. Please give them the Abbey's contact details should they require a reference. Until you are employed (and I am sure it will not take very long), we will continue to pay for your studies at Berne University. You still have wages outstanding from your work on the Abbey farm.

Please come and visit us at the Abbey again as soon as you can. We would all like to see you. Also, please extend an invitation to Sennett to come and look at some of our ancient texts in our library. I had been meaning to ask her for some time but was unsure whether to invite her before now, understanding your feelings for her.

You will need to come back at some point to sign some papers but these are mere formalities. There is no rush.

I look forward to seeing you and God bless.

Abbot Philemon.

Silas sighed to himself. He would miss the Abbot and the brothers but he could not restrict his future to the walls of the Abbey. It was a comfort to know how much good will was there for him, however.

During the next week, Silas and Sennett laid their plans to return to Switzerland.

Silas began sending emails to farms in the central farming district. With Sennett's help, he was able to put together a good resume of his skills and present himself well. He received offers of interviews almost immediately.

Sennett also contacted the University to Berne to see if they had any suitable positions. She received an enthusiastic reply asking her to meet with the University Chancellor. They seemed prepared to make a position for her, depending on her preferences.

They decided that Silas would go on ahead to see Abbot Philemon and attend interviews. Sennett would follow a week later to visit Berne University and begin negotiations for a contract.

After Silas had been back in London for two weeks, he left again by private plane under cover of night to line up his future in Switzerland with Sennett.

Abbot Philemon welcomed Silas with a wide grin and arms open for a hug. Despite Sennett's thoughts on the subject, Silas had learned about the art of hugging during his time at the Abbey. The men were affectionate in a mild way and Silas had gained a great deal of his new security through the occasional hug or pat on the back that he had received from the men of the community. It had made him feel less isolated and repulsive; less of a freak.

Silas had to sign papers to release himself from his Novitiate vows – fortunately not perpetual ones. The Abbot offered to let Silas use the Abbey as a base while attending interviews and making arrangements. He would not be required to attend the Divine Offices or keep the Abbey's usual hours but he could have his old cell back for the time being. Silas accepted with gratitude but knew he would be spending a great deal of time on the road, going from farm to farm for interviews and staying in motels.

In the end, the second farm that Silas went to for an interview would prove to be his future home. It was a small to medium sized farm. Silas would complete his apprenticeship under the supervision of the farm owner, and a senior cowherd and a shepherd. Part of his time would be spent at the local agricultural college studying animal science – something the Abbey would have done after his Novitiate if he had stayed.

The money was good for an apprentice, the hours would enable him to continue his study through Berne University part-time and there was a workers cottage available to him in one of the fields if he wished to use it.

It suited Silas as he had rather dreaded working on a very big farm with a large group of established animal husbandry experts. He still was nervous about integrating himself in a group although he had learned through his time at the Abbey that in the outside world, people could be kind and good. He felt comfortable working with three other men at this smaller farm. The owner also seemed sympathetic about his delicate colouring as an albino and willing to work with Silas to ensure his health was protected. This kind of consideration was unlikely in a larger establishment.

By the time Sennett arrived, the paperwork had been signed and Silas was due to begin within a few weeks.

He found her in the library with her dark head bent over some fragile, old text when he came in from the stables the day she arrived. She didn't hear him come in at first, so intent was she on trying to date the manuscript from the linguistic evidence and how the letters were formed. When he touched her shoulder, she looked up and grinned from ear to ear.

"Hail the conquering hero," she said, referring to his successful job hunt.

"I'd prefer a kiss," he said in his rasping voice.

He got one.

Sennett had to stay in a hotel in Engelberg as women sleeping in the Abbey was strictly forbidden. The Abbot suggested to them that perhaps they would consider getting married in the Engelberg Cathedral as the brothers would love to have the opportunity to attend the ceremony.

Sennett and Silas exchanged a look of delight. Why hadn't they thought of that?

"Sennett will need to invite her family," Silas said considerately.

"No… I don't think I'll do that," Sennett said musingly, "If you meet my family before we get married, you might change your mind."

Neither the Abbot nor Silas thought it was likely.

Later when they were alone, strolling through the shady parts of the Abbey garden, Silas said, "Are you sure you won't invite your family?"

"They'd spoil it," Sennett said in a small voice and then sighed, "And I don't want that day spoilt. Not that day," she emphasized.

"Why do you think they'd spoil it?" Silas asked hesitantly. Sennett's family was rather a taboo topic. She rarely spoke about them and the times she had, Silas had got a very negative picture.

"They've spoiled just about everything else," Sennett said with unusual bitterness and frowned.

Suddenly Sennett thought of something for the first time and a feeling of creeping horror flooded her veins.

"Silas, do you want children?" she asked, trying to sound casual and failing utterly.

Silas winced. Here was an issue that he had deliberately squashed into the back of his mind. He didn't know what to say.

"Why? Do you, Sennett?" he asked tentatively in his deep voice.

She stopped walking and turned to face Silas, a troubled look on her face.

"I should have said something sooner. I don't know why I didn't think to. I've been selfish. I never considered that it may be something you want because it hasn't been a priority to me. I can't have children Silas. It's dangerous for a woman with Lupus to get pregnant. Doctors advise against it," she said with a mixture of anxiety and sorrow, "I'm sorry Silas."

Silas felt nothing but relief. He was terrified of passing his albino genes onto a child, although the risk was not particularly high. He had suffered so much as a result of his unusual looks that he hadn't wanted to risk any child of his having the condition too. He had made up his mind about that as a teenager and never changed it. If Sennett had desperately wanted children, he would not have denied her anything but it was a relief that it would not be an issue.

Silas gently told her how he felt about having children and he could see the tension leave Sennett's slender frame.

"I don't know why I didn't think of it either," he admitted.

"Everything has happened so fast, I suppose," she said, taking his hand as they walked.

"I would like it to happen faster," Silas said guilelessly and made Sennett laugh, "Talking of which, when do you want to get married?"

"Whenever you like," Sennett said, feeling completely relaxed and untroubled again.

"On Sunday?" he suggested, not seeing any reason why not if her family were not to be invited.

Sennett looked at his pale profile in the shady light under the trees and thought seriously about the suggestion.

Why not, she thought? Her family did not have to get here. She would tell them later, when she broke the news to them that she had moved from London to Switzerland. She could get a simple white dress inside a week in Zurich or one of the other cities. The brothers could be the witnesses. There was no need of a reception without family or other guests there.

"Yes but what about the honeymoon?" she joked lightly.

Silas just turned his pale head and smiled down at her. So long as she agreed to marry him at the end of the week, the rest didn't matter.

A/N 26/01/2009 – I think it's about 2 years since I looked at this story. Just recently I've received a few emails about it out of the blue asking about the epilogue / sequel which got me thinking about it again. I'm now about 18 or 19 chapters deep into that sequel and hopefully will finish it in the next couple of weeks. It's called 'The Temptation of Silas' and you can find it on this web-site – I just posted the first chapter today. It ties up the loose ends and we'll be able to leave Silas and Sennett in peace after this, I think.