There had always been an unspoken rule in that apartment: no women.

Gojyo was (very) aware of Hakkai's (understandable) aversion towards the female gender. Sure, it meant a small inconvenience for him, the resident playboy, but he would survive. Anyways, it was easier to sneak out of a house than try and make a girl leave. He couldn't blame them if they wanted to stay; he really was that good.

However, Hakkai was his best and closest (and only) friend, and that was a very rare indulgence for Gojyo, especially after that whole Banri fiasco. Hakkai knew very well the sacrifice that his friend had made, and was deeply appreciative (and impressed). He had always half- expected Gojyo to forgot, but his roommate turned out to be more responsible than he let on. For months, the two had lived together in (relative) peace, and the unspoken rule remained unbroken and, well, unspoken.

Until tonight.

Hakkai had just finished his latest novel (a romantic thriller in which a man, blinded by the power of love, went on a murderous rampage for the sake of his beloved, but was mortally wounded and rescued by a gorgeous man whom he was quickly enchanted by. Not his usual fare, but it was the only book around the house he could find that he hadn't read. And why had Gojyo had it in the first place…?) and was just about to step outside for a breath of the balmy, 3-o'clock-in-the-morning, summer air. He might be a little chilly in the tank top and sweatpants he had borrowed from Gojyo, but he'd tough it out for that small pleasure. Then, the door slammed open (so hard it left a mark, which, Hakkai noted unhappily, he would have to paint over) and admitted his friend and…a woman.

They were currently heavily involved in each other (read: sucking face) and all Hakkai could do for a moment was stare. And that moment dragged on as Hakkai continued to stare and began to wonder how Gojyo retained those wonderful shoulder muscles that were currently exposed by his (bunched at the elbows) button-down shirt. His train of thought was interrupted when he heard Gojyo speak.

"Mmm…'kai," he called, breathing heavily.

The (blasphemous) woman was sucking on his ear and staring at (appraising) the other man in the room. Her long black hair was pulled back in a ponytail, except for the bangs which fell into her glittering, blue eyes. Her white dress glowed against Gojyo's black (leather) ensemble with a strange luminescence. He noticed her gauche, gaudy, golden jewelry and bright red lipstick, and indignantly thought Whore. The woman smirked as if she could hear his thoughts. The grin was vaguely familiar, and set off warning bells in his head.

"Gojyo, baby, is this the roommate you were talking about?" she asked coyly.

"Hmmm? Yeah, that's him," Gojyo responded slowly, looking at Hakkai over his shoulder.

Instantly, Hakkai noticed the haze in those blood-coloured (and blood-shot) eyes. He was completely, totally, and undeniably trashed. Hakkai couldn't ever recall seeing his friend this shit-faced. He usually only lost his motor skills, not his mind.

"'Kai, c'mere babe," he slurred.

Wrapping one arm around his woman's (whore's, thought Hakkai) waist, he turned to face Hakkai. Blushing slightly, but oddly annoyed, he attempted a gracious smile and strode to the couple.

"Good, er, morning. My name is Cho Hakkai. It is a pleasure to meet you, Miss…" he trailed off, inviting her to introduce herself (read: prove to Hakkai that she wasn't a sleazy whore and had some sort of decorum). After a slightly awkward silence, she responded, "The Kannon."

Hakkai blanched, and almost laughed in her face.

She must be a whore. She even had a street name.

"The Merciful Goddess? What an…unusual name," he commented, managing to retain his normal, pleasant demeanor.

Gojyo gazed at her with unfocused eyes, and said "She sure is a goddess, hey 'Kai?" as he slid a hand to her ass.

Hakkai, now more than a little annoyed (and jealous) kept the grin plastered on and said, "Well, if you'll excuse me, I was just about to take a walk." He started past them towards the still wide-open door when the woman (slut) stopped him.

"At 3 in the morning?" she grinned. Grinding his teeth, Hakkai turned towards her. (Must not take off limiters…must not kill) Kannon (ha, yeah right) wrapped her arms around Gojyo's neck and continued.

"We came back here for you, honey. Gojyo mentioned that he had a…roommate…and I decided it was terribly sad that you were here all alone, even though Gojyo said it would be better if he didn't bring me here." She delivered the line with an innocent voice, but Hakkai could see something calculating in her smile. However, the thought that Gojyo had attempted to uphold the "rule" made him all warm inside.

Wait.

Nope, that was just the demon in him acting all possessive again.

Kannon reached out and lightly grabbed his wrist and drew him closer to her and Gojyo. "So, whaddya say, sweetie? Want to have some fun with us?"

Hakkai's first thought was

'Wonderful, a female Gojyo'

and his following thought was

'Wait…what?'

The full implications of the words sank in and he allowed himself approximately three seconds of shock. Then…he decided he needed a few more. He barely noticed when Kannon pulled him right up to her (hey, was she taller?) and leaned in to kiss him. He jumped a little in surprise. Then, the anger settled. That was his first kiss since…her…and damnit, he had been waiting for Gojyo to…er…de-virginze…Cho Hakkai. Again, a knowing smile bloomed on the woman's (prostitute's) face and she leaned towards Gojyo, who had been standing oddly still for a raging, horny drunk.

"Gojyo, darling," she purred (back off bitch! Hakkai thought) "What about that…ménage-a-trois we talked about?"

As if her speech had reanimated him, Gojyo allowed a sensual (read: fucking hot) smirk slide across his face, and his eyes seemed to clear up a bit.

"What about it?" he asked, letting his gaze drop down Hakkai's half-dressed body.

Hakkai suddenly had a very ominous feeling.

Other than the one in his groin, that is.

Gojyo swayed (both drunkenly and sexily) towards Hakkai, relinquishing his grip on the woman (whore). He gripped Hakkai's wrist and tugged him forward until he was between the woman and Gojyo. Gojyo's face was inches away from his own.

Hakkai then realized something very, very suspicious.

He could not smell alcohol on his friend's breath.

None, whatsoever.

His last truly coherent thought was "Something is not right", and then Gojyo kissed him.

'What's not right?' Hakkai thought as he allowed Gojyo's tongue to invade his mouth. He felt his wrists fall back to his side as they were released, and then two hands on his ass. Gojyo rocked his hips against Hakkai forcefully, setting the (delirious) man off balance. Luckily, there was a wall close by.

Hakkai felt he could finally fully appreciate the phrase "between a rock and a hard place".

At the moment, he just couldn't figure out which was which.

He wrapped his arms around Gojyo's neck and began to thoroughly enjoy himself, feeling months of sexual tension dissolve. Gojyo maneuvered a thigh between Hakkai's legs and straddle one of his in the same motion. His hands moved to the hem of Hakkai's (borrowed) tank top and removed it in one sharp pull.

Gojyo was very talented.

Hakkai took the opportunity to push Gojyo's shirt the rest of the way off.

Growling, (one of the sexiest sounds Hakkai had ever heard) Gojyo grabbed his hands and pinned them above his head, pressing his more firmly into the wall. Abandoning his mouth, Gojyo lapped across his jaw line and lightly bit his earlobe. Hakkai moaned softly, and then louder when his friend's hands found their way to his cock. His legs opened wider of their own accord and he closed his eyes tightly.

Only to open them again when he heard "Who's the whore now, Cho Hakkai?"

His eyes focused on the woman leaning against the (still opened) front door, not five feet away. Gojyo continued as if he hadn't heard her (which, perhaps, he hadn't). Because of his…compromising position, he couldn't do anything more than glare, and even that was dulled by the…passion…he was feeling.

"Well," she said with a satisfied smirk, "I think my job is done here."

"Excuse me?" Hakkai asked around a moan. Gojyo had somehow managed to open both of their jeans, and was now thrusting earnestly against him.

Smiling with an excess of confidence, she brushed back her bangs to display a red chakra in the middle of her forehead. Nonplussed, Hakkai opened his mouth, but only another groan came out.

Chuckling, Kanzeon Bosatsu waved, and bid him a farewell ("Have fun!") before vanishing in a flash of light.

Well now, that was certainly unexpected, Hakkai mused. Then again, so was being screwed into the wall by your best friend in your shared apartment.

Suddenly, Gojyo froze and leaned against Hakkai, panting.

"Umm…'Kai?"

"Yes, Gojyo?"

"Oh…I hoped it was you. What exactly just happened?"

"I really don't understand it myself."

"Oh, right."

"…"

"…"

"Er, Gojyo…"

"Yeah?"

"If you're not planning on doing anything with it, do you think you could let go of my dick?"

"Hey now, who said I didn't plan on doing anything with it?"

"Oh."

Hakkai then decided that it wouldn't hurt if he started praying a little bit more. After all, the gods appeared to be very gracious.

Or capricious.

It worked for him.

Omake

"Merciful Goddess, where have you been?" Jiroshin asked in long-suffering.

"Oh, just down to the lower world for a visit," she said, looking supremely self-satisfied.

"Merciful Goddess, you didn't!"

"Didn't what?"

"It was you yourself that said gods were only here to observe, not meddle."

"Oh believe me, I observed," Kanzeon Bosatsu responded, smirking. "And if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go observe some more."