Ichigo-baachan (Grandma Strawberry)

Summary: NarutoXHarryPotter crossover. Orochimaru joining forces with Voldemort? Naruto characters at Hogwarts? Harry Potter-sama? Wtf happened?

Title: Harry Potter-sama! Wtf?

Chapter 1

Ichigo: My first fanfic! (sobs pathetically) And it's a NarutoXHarryPotter crossover!

Naruto: Yay! And I'm the main character! (cheers)

Ichigo: Ah…hehe (laughs nervously) gomen Naruto, but…the main character is S-

Naruto: NANI! NOOO! It can't be Sasuke-teme! It can't, it can't, it can't! A teme like him doesn't deserve it!

Sasuke: Shut up dobe.

Ichigo: …don't interrupt me Naruto (glares) I was going to say the main character is S-

Naruto: NOOO! NOT SASUKE-TEME!

Ichigo: (punches Naruto) QUIET BAKA! As I was saying…the main character is Sakura!

Naruto: NOOO! NOT SASUK-….wait…did you say Sakura-chan is the main character?

Ichigo: Hai hai. What are you, deaf? - -; (sweatdrops)

Naruto: Well it's Sakura-chan so it's okay! Although I think I would have been a better main character…

Sakura: OH SO YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME? NARUTO NO BAKA! (punches Naruto)

Ichigo: coughs ahem…eh…I think it's time for Chapter 1...(sound of Sakura beating up Naruto is heard in the background)

Harry Potter-sama! Wtf?(Sakura and everybody else are currently 14 years

By: Ichigo-baachan old and Sasuke ran away from Orochimaru.)

Chapter 1

"Blah"-Talking I do not own Naruto. T-T

'Blah'- Thinking

"Blah"- Inner Sakura

"Are they real?" a teacher whispered.

"That big? I doubt it!" another teacher replied. ((A.N.-guess what they're talking about? XP))

Strangely enough, the two people who had just spoken wore long robes of black and black pointed hats. But they weren't the only ones. A hall with four other teachers were wearing similar looking clothes.

In the middle of the hall stood a tall, thin, very old man . He had silver hair and a beard, which were both long enough to tuck into his belt. He wore long robes, a purple cloak that swept the ground, and high-heeled, buckled boots. His eyes were light, bright (and usually sparkling-but not now), blue. In front of his eyes were half-moon spectacles that lay on a long, crooked nose. This odd looking man was Albus Dumbledore himself.

Dumbledore pointed his wand at the stranger that stood in front of him, the usual twinkle in his eyes gone. Instead of his usually-smiling-mouth, his mouth was replaced with a grim line.

"You were able to sneak into Hogwarts unnoticed, yet I do not know how you managed to do it. Just who are you?", Dumbledore asked, his eyes still staring at the stranger suspiciously, with his wand still targeted at the person before him.

The figure let out a sigh then replied. "I am Tsunade."

….?(later on)...?...

Albus Dumbledore and a woman with long, blond, pigtails and a huge bust sipped their tea quietly in Dumbledore's study, as a phoenix behind them ruffled squawked as it ruffled it's feathers. "So…who did you say you were again?" Dumbledore asked, trying to start up a conversation to fill in the awkward silence that filled his study.

"Tsunade. I am currently the hokage of the village Konoha. I understand that you do know Konoha?"

"Ah…yes…Konoha. The Hidden Village of the Leaf, wasn't it? But what has happened to Sarutobi? From what I had last heard from, Sarutobi was still the hokage of Konoha, and I can see that you aren't him because you are very…different from him, let's just say.", Dumbledore said.

"I have replaced Sarutobi.", Tsunade replied with a sip of her tea.

"Wish I had sake instead…", she muttered under her breath as she cringed as the bitter taste of the tea entered her mouth.

"So Sarutobi has retired?" Dumbledore asked, not hearing what Tsunade had muttered.

"Hah! Retired? I wish. He was killed.", Tsunade answered while glaring at the poor, innocent, teacup that lay in her hand.

"Sarutobi was killed?" Dumbledore asked, calm expression on his face, yet his eyes showed his true feelings.

"Have you heard of Orochimaru?"

"Orochimaru? Oh yes. He was one of the students of Sarutobi and an acquaintance of yours, correct? I heard that he was one of the Three Legendary Sannins, the other two being you, Tsunade, and Jiraiya. But unlike you two, he took the path of evil, didn't he?" said Dumbledore.

"I see you have been informed very well.", Tsunade said with one of her eyebrows raised. ((A.N.-only Dumbledore so far knows about shinobi-I have no idea how though…Dumbledore is indeed a mysterious man eyes glint "mysteriously"))

"The last Chuunin Exams we had took place in Konoha. There was some rumors of Orochimaru appearing in one of the tests, but we ignored them and continued with the Chuunin Exams. But later on, Orochimaru and his fellow Sound nins, and even some Sand nins, attacked Konoha. During the attack, Sarutobi was killed by Orochimaru. But luckily, because of Sarutobi, Orochimaru's arms are now completely useless.", Tsunade continued.

"I see. But I am curious to know one more thing. Why have you come to Hogwarts?" Dumbledore asked.

"There were many rumors of Orochimaru joining forces with your so called 'Voldemort'. I had come to ask permission if I could bring some chosen shinobi from Konoha and 3 other shinobi from Sunagakure ((A.N.-guess who!)) to stay in Hogwarts for a while to see if Orochimaru really has joined forces, or if it's just rumors.", Tsunade replied seriously, staring straight at Dumbledore now.

"Of course, of course! But I have a favor to ask of you. You have heard of Harry Potter?", Dumbledore asked a smile lingering on his lips, and his eyes glittering behind his spectacles.

"Harry Potter…Harry Potter…ah…you mean 'The Boy Who Lived'? Yes I have heard of him. Why do you ask?" Tsunade said.

"Harry Potter has been the victim of Voldemort for many years, and since there is a chance that your Orochimaru have joined Voldemort, I was wondering if your shinobi could help by keeping an eye out for Harry during their stay at Hogwarts, so he won't get into anything dangerous that is related to Voldemort.", Dumbledore requested.

"Of course I will, after all, you are letting the shinobi stay in Hogwarts.", Tsunade answered.

"And I will be paying you. How many will be coming?"

Tsunade paused then replied, "Fifteen people. That is an agreeable amount, I hope?"

"Yes. I will pay you 500 galleons for each person ((A.N.-eh…let's just pretend Dumbledore is SUPER rich)).", Dumbledore said.

'So 7,500 galleons altogether, eh? With all that money, I could get super rich from gambling by the time I get halfway through it…', Tsunade thought, chuckling quietly to herself.

"But please give all 500 galleons to each person, because I will not be able to give them it myself.", Dumbledore said, interrupting Tsunade from her dreams of gambling.

The words stabbed through Tsunade's body, when Dumbledore's words had reached her ears.

'WHAT ABOUT MY GAMBLING! AND MY DEAR, PRECIOUS, SAKE TOO!', Tsunade thought, sobbing mentally in her head.

As Tsunade ranted on and on inside her mind about not being able to gamble and drink sake, Dumbledore again interrupted and added, " But of course, you will need to be paid also. I'll throw in 700 more galleons ((A.N.-RICH I TELL YOU! RICH!))."

If Tsunade was the type of person who didn't mind hugs, she would have hugged Dumbledore and danced with him around the room. "It's a deal!" Tsunade cried happily, as Dumbledore shook hands with her.

….?(1 week later)...?

"Hmm…Platform Nine and Three-Quarters…Platform Nine and Three-Quarters…", Sakura muttered under her breath while staring at the ticket in her hand.

"Platform Nine and Three-Quarters? Is there even such thing?" a voice inside Sakura's head said.

'There better be or I'll take away all of Tsunade-sensei's sake.', Sakura replied.

'Ah Sakura, Sakura, Sakura. You have grown up to be such a good person.', Inner Sakura replied sarcastically.

'Who do you think I learned my "goodness" from?' Sakura said while rolling her eyes.

"SA-KU-RA-CHAN" a voice yelled out, attracting the people that were crowded in the train station.

As a blond dot bobbed through the crowd and toward her, Sakura sighed.

'Jeez, can't he be quiet for once? He's embarrassing us by attracting so much attention.'

"Hey what do you expect? He's Naruto after all, and just because he's in a strange, new, place doesn't mean that he's going to act any different."

'True.', Sakura thought with a sigh.

Their conversation ended when the orange-coated, yellow-headed Naruto, stopped beside her.

"Sakura-chan! Do you know where Platform Nine and Three-Quarters is?" Naruto asked.

"What do you think? I'm sure that if I knew where Platform Nine and Three-Quarters were, then I wouldn't be here right now, would I?" Sakura answered, while thinking, 'How'd I get into this mess?'

….? (1 week ago)...?

"So we're going to go to a school called 'Hoojwars' that teaches people how to do magic? And we're going to go there to protect a guy named 'Hurry Popper' from

'Voohdelmoleart', who is known being of the most dangerous wizards in the world, and has just joined forces with Orochimaru?" a voice yelled, coming from the direction of the Hokage's office.

Tsunade sat behind her desk, laughing nervously as an angry face glared at her. "Haruno-kun, no need to worry, everything has been arranged. And the school is called Hogwarts and you are going to be protecting Harry Potter from Voldemort."

Sakura took in a deep breath then asked, "How old is this Harry Potter?"

"The same age as you.", Tsunade replied, happy that Sakura had finally calmed down.

"And anyway, it's not like you're going to be doing this mission alone. You're going to be accompanied by Naruto, Sasuke, Tenten, Neji, Rock Lee, Chouji, Shikamaru, Ino, Hinata, Kiba, and Shino. And Gaara, Kankurou, and Temari of Sunagakure will also be accompanying you during this mission.", Tsunade added, glancing at each and everyone of them. ((A.N.-everybody-including Gaara, Kankurou, and Temari-are all in Tsunade's office))

'Why are they going to come?' Sakura thought, shuddering at the thought of Gaara.

"Who knows? That Harry guy must be pretty important to need that much protection. Is he just too weak to protect himself or something?", Inner Sakura replied while snorting.

They were interrupted when a parchment envelope was shoved in Sakura's face. Taking the envelope from Kiba, Sakura ripped it open.

A piece of paper fell out, that read 'Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry' on it. Beneath it, said "Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore (Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc. Chf, Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed of Wizards.)". And underneath that, it read: Dear Ms. Haruno, We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment. Term begins on September 1. We await your owl no later than July 31. Yours sincerely, Minerva McGonagall, Deputy Headmistress.

Sakura looked at a second piece of paper that had a list on it.

"All your supplies will be for Grade 4, since Harry Potter is currently his fourth year in Hogwarts, I decided that the mission would be easier if you were in the same year and were in the same classes as him. But you will have to pretend that you are 'Japanese wizards' so it won't cause attention to yourselves. You will be able to get your supplies and clothes at a place called Diagon Alley, and Shizune will be coming along to help.", Tsunade said, after everybody had finished reading. She then handed everybody a bag bulging with the so called "wizard money", regretting what she was doing.

'Diagon Alley? Wonder where that is.", Sakura thought.

….?(At Diagon Alley)….?

"What the hell…", Kankurou muttered.

Everybody agreed to what Kankurou had just said, except for Shikamaru, who just said, " How troublesome."

The sun shone brightly as they stepped through a hole in a brick wall. There were a stack of cauldrons outside a shop that was nearest to them, with a sign hanging over them.

As they walked slowly, they looked around them, trying to see everything at once, but failed miserably. There were shops that were selling strange items, and people shopping.

"THIS IS SO COOL!" Naruto yelled.

"Hn.", Sasuke replied.

But even Sasuke was amazed at the sight around them.

Shizune ((A.N.- their guide)) led them to a shop called Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions, while explaining to them about Hogwarts. The houses (Gryffindor, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw), Quidditch, the point-earning/losing system, etc.

As they entered the shop, a plump, squat, and smiling witch appeared, claiming that she was Madam Malkin, the owner of the shop. "Hogwarts, dears?" she asked, eyeing each of them while thinking, 'What a strange looking group.'

"Uh…hai, I mean yes.", Shizune answered.

"Come with me then.", Madam Malkin said, leading them toward the back of the shop. After a few minutes, everybody had been measured, and given their robes.

As they left the shop, Ino said with a disgusted look on her face, "What kind of uniform is this? They could at least have made it better looking."

For once, Sakura had to agree with her. The black robes were certainly unfashionable. And the hats! What kind of fool thought it was a great idea to wear a pointed cap on one's head?

Next, they went into a shop called Flourish and Blotts, where they bought the books that were needed, then brought their cauldrons, scales for weighing potion ingredients, a brass telescope, and some potion supplies, in some other shops.

"Oh man! What was with the smell in that shop? It smells even worse than when Naruto farted in my face during the Chuunin Exams!" Kiba exclaimed, his hands covering his sensitive nose as Akamaru whined. They had just left a shop called Apothecary, which was fascinating, although it smelled like a mixture of bad eggs and rotted cabbages, when Temari spotted a shop called Eeylops Owl Emporium.

After squealing about how adorable the owls were, they finally went in and each bought an owl for themselves. For some strange reason, the owls that were in Eeylops Owl Emporium were not ordinary colored, and the owls that everybody had picked had a personality and even color, that matched it's new owner, so poor Naruto ended up with an owl that constantly hooted loudly.

After a whole day of shopping, they stopped by an inn and rented some rooms to stay in. Shizune then told them to go to the train station, and go to Platform Nine and Three-Quarters and board a train called the Hogwarts Express. After giving them all tickets for the train, she bid them goodbye and left.

As Shizune walked out of the inn, she thought, "I feel like I'm forgetting something…" ((AN.-guess what she forgot cough wands cough))

….?(current time)...?

Sakura sighed, as she thought about what had happened.

"S-S-Sakura-chan. I heard s-some p-people talking about P-p-platform Nine and T-t-three-q-quarters.", a timid voice said.

"Eh? Hinata-chan? When'd you get here?" Naruto questioned.

"I-I was h-helping Kiba-kun w-with h-his cart.", Hinata said, her face turning bright red.

'N-N-Naruto-kun is l-looking a-at m-me!' Hinata thought, still stuttering as she thought. ((AN.-how weird is that? XP))

As Hinata was thinking, everybody else joined them and wondered where Platform Nine and Three-quarters were.

"If we don't want to attract attention, we'll have to do it in groups today. Harry, Ron, and Hermione, you'll all be going first. Go ahead and hurry up or you'll all miss the train to Hogwarts!", a woman's voice said.

"Hey, the must be going to Hogwarts too!" Tenten whispered. "Let's go ask them about Platform Nine and Three-Quarters!"

Hesitating at first, the group approached the woman who had spoken. After a great deal of arguing, they finally decided that Neji should ask the lady about their problem. Neji cautiously stepped forward and asked, "Do you know how to get to Hogwarts Express? We overheard you talking about it, and were wondering if you knew."

"First time in Hogwarts dear? Don't worry, we…well they (at this, the woman glanced at a small group of kids behind her) are attending Hogwarts too, although not at the same time.", she answered. "I'm Mrs. Weasley by the way.", she added.

"So…how do you get there?" Shikamaru asked after they had introduced themselves.

"See that barrier over there, between Platform Nine and Ten? All you have to do is walk straight toward it. But don't stop and don't be scared that you'll crash into it, that's very important. Best do it at a bit of a run if you're nervous.", Mrs. Weasley said.

"Thank you for your kind help, 'Mrs. We-sal-lee'! I can see that youth still burns deep inside of you! Gai-sensei would be very proud of you! May your fire of youth burn forever!" Rock Lee boomed while doing his 'nice-guy pose'.

"Oh shit I'm going blind…"

"My eyes! They burn!"

"…"

"Hn."

"Ahem…it's been a pleasure.", Mrs. Weasley said, squinting her eyes.

"Yosh! I'll be going first!" Rock Lee exclaimed, with flames of fire in his eyes.

Rock Lee ran toward the barrier while continuously talking about "youth" and how "Gai-sensei would be proud of him", he disappeared.

After everybody went, Mr. Weasley appeared at Mrs. Weasley's side. "What a strange bunch of kids.", he said to his wife.

"Arthur! That's not a nice thing to say!" Mrs. Weasley exclaimed angrily.

"But you have to admit Molly, it's true."

...?(End)...?

Ichigo: Holy wow! I FINISHED! I'm done with my FIRST chapter of my FIRST fanfic! Wa hoo! (cheers)--sorry that Harry didn't come out in this chapter.

Naruto: I'm going to kick butt in 'Hoojwars'!

Ichigo:...it's Hogwarts, Naruto, not 'Hoojwars'...(sweatdrops)

Naruto: Didn't I just say that?

Ichigo: No.

Sasuke: Dobe.

Naruto: What's that, teme?

Sasuke: Are you deaf? I just said you're a dobe.

Naruto: BAKA!

Sakura: Naruto you shouldn't say that because Sasuke-kun is actually smart, unlike you.

Naruto: Awww...Sakura-chan, why are you standing up to a teme like Sasuke?

Sasuke: Shut up dobe.

Ichigo: (completely ignored)...uh...review? (and yet again, Sakura is heard in the background, beating up poor Naruto)