The plane had crashed two days ago. Things were starting to calm down. People were simply waiting for rescue. Then there was Hurley.
"Dude!" he yelled toward a short, man wearing a striped shirt. "Come here!"
The man ran over.
"Your name is Charlie, right?"
"Yeah." Said Charlie "What can I do for you?"
"I was actually kinda hoping you would like, explore this island with me. You know people are just sitting around and waiting. I thing we should do something!"
"They're probably not doing anything because of the polar bears and that monster thing out there!" exclaimed Charlie.
"Polar Bear?"
"You didn't hear about the polar bear?"
"No. But I'm gonna go. Are you coming or what dude?"
"I guess," sighed Charlie.
Two hours later, after finally getting everything packed and ready they finally set off. After stumbling through the bushes and underbrush of the forest for a half an hour in silence, Charlie pulled out a camera and started snapping pictures.
"Dude, what the hell are you doing?" asked Hurley, staring at Charlie with one eyebrow raised and his mouth slightly opened. "Where did you get that?"
"I got it from my luggage and I'm taking pictures so other people can know what the island looks like." Said Charlie.
"Well in that case I think you should take a picture of that tree over there since it looks so different than all the trees at camp."
Charlie glared at him. Hurley turned around and walked away as Charlie took a picture of his backside and smiled to himself.
After continuing their difficult journey through the jungle for another two hours and arguing over everything the entire way, both Hurley and Charlie were getting tired. Charlie sat down on a nearby log and opened his backpack.
"What are you doing now, dude?" Hurled asked irritably.
"Break" said Charlie taking a swig of his water bottle.
Hurley sat down next to him and stared at the bottle in his hand. It was a small one with the Oceanic label on the side of it.
"Do you have any water?" Asked Charlie offering his own to Hurley.
"Course" He answered.
Hurley pulled a giant Nalgene bottle out of his pack and drank the whole thing in one swig. Charlie just stared at him.
"What?" said Hurley. "I'm a big guy, okay? I need water." He took another one out of his pack.
"Look," said Charlie "The clouds over there are getting really dark. I think it's gonna rain. Maybe we should head back to camp."
"I was just thinking the same thing!" Said Hurley as he jumped up.
Charlie stood up too and they turned towards camp. They walked for a few minutes and feeling more comfortable with each other, Charlie started speaking his mind. A bit too much.
"So, have you seen that Shannon girl?" he asked. "Bloody Hell is she hot! Those legs and… and… the hair…and the everything." He sighed.
Hurley laughed.
"You know, I personally think she wears too many clothes. That bikini she had on today was way too-"
"Shhh!" said Hurley suddenly.
He looked all around and turned in a circle. Charlie started to say something but he put his hand up to stop him.
"Do you hear that?" asked Hurley.
Charlie listened more carefully and he too heard a sort of hissing noise.
"Yeah." He said. "It sounds like… like a car engine cooling down."
Yeah." Said Hurley.
He pushed past Charlie and disappeared into the forest. Charlie listened and could hear him rustling around in the leaves and underbrush. Then-
"What the Hell!" Yelled Hurley. "Oh my God, dude! Get your ass over here!"
Charlie ran towards the noise and smacked right into Hurley's back and fell flat on his bottom. He stood up rubbing his tail bone.
"Dude, is it legal for me to see you doing that?" asked Hurley as he watched Charlie rub at his ass.
"Wha-" Charlie looked wildly around, breathing heavily. "What the hell are you bloody yelling about?" He exclaimed
Hurley stepped aside and Charlie saw what the commotion was about. Looking as if it had crashed into the ground stood a big, gold, dome shaped, glass structure. It wasn't broken but the door was hanging wide open.
"What is it?" asked Charlie
"He walked forward and looked in the door of the object. It had room for about three people to stand comfortably inside and all the walls were covered in labeled buttons. He and Hurley both climbed all the way in and shut the door.
"What do we do?" Whispered Charlie
Hurley reached toward one of the buttons with his finger outstretched.
"Wait don't push it!" yelled Charlie
"Hurley jerked his finger away and looked down at the short man who was ordering him around.
"Why not?" he said slyly
"Because! You don't know what it will do! It could kill us!"
"We'll never find out if we don't try" said Hurley and quickly pushed a button labeled 'The Management office'. The contraption spun off the ground and shot up into the air. Hurley and Charlie were both knocked off their feet. Regaining their footing, they both stood up and stared out the glass. They were flying through the air so fast they couldn't even make out the trees wizzing by. Everything was a blur. Then suddenly the contraption hit the ground and they were once again thrown backwards.
Hurley stood up first and gazed through the glass.
"Woah dude. I don't think we're on Craphole Island anymore, Charlie." He said.
Charlie stood and looked out too. They had landed in the middle of what looked to be an office. But it looked strange. There was only half of everything in the room. Half a lamp, half a bookshelf, half a portrait on the wall. There was also half a desk with a whole man wearing a purple top hat sitting at it, writing on a pad of paper. Hurley immediately tried to open the door.
"Dude! It's locked! I can't get out!" He yelled.
They began pounding on the sides of the glass contraption.
"Help! Help us!" they shouted "We're trapped on an island! All fourty-eight of us and we need someone to rescue us! Help!"
The man didn't seem to hear them. They continued to pound and yell for a few minutes.
"It's useless!" cried Charlie "I don't think he can hear us. What the bloody hell is going on?"
"Maybe were in some kind of time warp machine!" Cried Hurley "This is better than Star Trek!"
"I don't think so." Said Charlie "This looks more like an… like an elevator to me."
"Yeah." Said Hurley. "A giant glass elevator. So what do we do now?"
"Press another button."
"You choose."
"Okay." Said Charlie.
He looked around at all the buttons lining the walls. There must have been thousands of them.
He chose one that said 'Peanut Butter Room' next to it.
"Hold on this time!" He said over the noise emitting from the elevator.
They blasted of the ground and began wizzing through the air again, getting faster and faster as they went. But this time instead of hitting the ground they just got slower and slower until they were simply floating. They went through two giant swinging doors and entered into a room that looked to be a half a mile long. Floating along at the top of it, they looked down through the floor of the elevator at what was going on below. Tiny, little men with green hair were running around all dressed in a white uniform mixing things up and adding things to a giant vat of what looked like tan, creamy, peanut butter.
Several of the little men were at an assembly line. They looked as if they were trying to squeeze something out of peanuts into a jar. To Hurley and Charlie's surprise, a flow of creamy peanut butter came out the bottom of each peanut.
In the corner there was a circle of live squirrels pealing the shells off of hundreds of peanuts.
"Where are we?" asked Charlie
"In a nut house." Said Hurley in aww.
Charlie glared at him.
"Thanks for that." He said sarcastically
"Who are all those little people?"asked Hurley
"I don't know. They remind me of hobbits."
Hurley looked at him strangely.
"What?" said Charlie "You know! hobbits! The short little freaks from the Lord of the Rings books!"
The elevator was getting close to the end of the room.
"Okay this is just weird, right?" said Charlie
"Exactly." Said Hurley. "I think I'm gonna choose another button now."
He reached over and hit a button labeled 'The happy place'. Once again they were wizzed away through the air to yet another room. Floating toward the double doors the noticed a sign on them. It said Work in Progress. Do not enter.
"Umm… this might be a problem, dude." Said Hurley.
They went through the doors and floated around. Instead of going a half a mile forward, this room went about a half a mile up. They began to float toward the top.
Looking through the bottom of the elevator, they realized nobody was in this room. The only thing on the floor was a big fan labeled Happy Gas. It was blowing giant bubbles into the air. The bubbles seemed to be attracted to the elevator and began floating toward it where they would pop near an opening in the top.
It was making Hurley and Charlie feel rather light-headed. The were staggering around like they were extremely drunk and Charlie was even drooling.
"I like… this." He said " It's funner than the funnerest little… carrot… look a carrot!" His eyes rolled into the back of his head.
"Duuuuuuuuuuude." Mumbled Hurley as he drooled and fell over.
"HA!" laughed Charlie "You falled over!"
"He he he!" said Hurley.
The elevator exited the room and they both regained their sanity.
"I don't think I liked that." Said Hurley rubbing his head.
"No" said Charlie. "I'm gonna pick a better room."
He found a button labeled "Oompa Loompa room" and pressed it. Once again they were whisked away.
"What do you think an Oompa Loompa is?" asked Charlie.
"No idea" said Hurley "But I don't think it's normal. Not after this weird-ass day. I still can't figure out if I'm dreaming."
The elevator didn't slow down this time. They didn't see anymore of the strange place that they had spent the fast few hours. Instead they crashed. They crashed back into the island. Standing up, Hurley and Charlie looked around. They were back in the same place they had started. In the middle of the jungle.
Hurley tried the door. This time it opened and they stepped out. Charlie pulled out his camera and took a picture of the elevator. Then, it suddenly disappeared.
"Aww man!" said Hurley "Now I'll never know what an Oompa Loompa is!"
"Forget that!" said Charlie "Nobody back at camp is ever going to believe this!"
"Yeah, but you have the picture." Said Hurley
"Yeah." Said Charlie "Come on, lets go."
Three hours later they emerged through the forest and onto the beach. There was a big crowed gathered around Sayid and Jack. They seemed to be handing out assignments to the survivors.
Charlie and Hurley ran up to the group.
"You guys are never going to believe this!" said Charlie, breathing heavily.
"What's wrong?" asked Kate
"Well, we were in the jungle just sort of exploring." Said Charlie
"And we found this big glass elevator thingy!" said Hurley
"So we went inside" said Charlie "And we pressed a button."
"It had like a thousand buttons, dude."
"Okay just let me tell the story! Anyways, we pressed a button and it flew away into the sky and we landed in this big room where there was only half of everything. And there was a man sitting at a desk but he couldn't hear us for some reason. So we pushed another button and saw these little hobbit guy things making peanut butter. Then there was this room that I'd rather not talk about. It made us a bit loopy. After that we pressed another button and it brought us back here." Charlie finished, out of breath.
Hurley stood next to him nodding his head.
"You're right." Said Shannon "I don't believe you."
Everyone was standing there looking around at each other with raised eyebrows, trying to avoid eye contact with the two mental idiots in the center of the group. Several people stepped backwards.
"Did you drink enough water today?" asked Jack.
"We're not mental if that's what you think!" yelled Charlie. "Look I even have proof! I took a picture of it!" He waved the camera in the air.
People stared at him quizzically, with wide eyes.
"I hate to break it to you, Dopey… but nobody seems to have brought a black room to develop a camera with them." Said Sawyer.
Charlie rolled his eyes and hit himself in the head.
"Damnit!"
The End