Chapter 12 – Another Heart Calls

—xx—

Sunlight peeked through the blinds, somewhat illuminating the bedroom. Ed stirred under the thick covers, feeling uncomfortable as the rays began heating the fiery bedspread. He grumbled softly and began to throw the blankets away when he realized an arm was wrapped around him, securing the blanket in place. Struggling with the arm around him, Ed found that the more he tried to escape, the tighter that Roy would hold him. Eventually, after putting up a good fight, he turned to wake his partner up, fully intending on giving him a good lecture about the fact that he was not a person who "snuggled."

However, when he fumbled around to rouse him, he was stopped short. "God dammit," Ed mumbled, his cheeks heating against his control, "this is really gonna take some getting used to."

There were few things that truly left the blond completely devoid of words—him not being obnoxious was something of a miracle—but Roy's sleeping face, point blank, seemed to continue to leave him totally speechless. Edward freed his flesh hand from Roy's grasp to reach forward, tentatively, to run his fingers across his cheek. It seemed unreal to be here, that everything had fallen so easily into place, and that they could finally be together. Ed had never dreamed that from that first day that he saw him in that hallway, feeling the frightening pressure of a first crush in his chest, that it would somehow develop into this; this mutual love—goddamn it, that was a scary word!—between them that felt right and real. For the first time in his life, Ed wasn't worrying about the next Honors Literature paper, or what the Pythagorean identity for sine was; for the first time, school wasn't his main concern. Roy had inserted himself into this brain and his heart and had taken a good, permanent residence there, and for some reason, it felt right.

To be honest, Edward didn't trust it.

Maybe it was the fact that he had been let down before, or that Roy's past reputation was still cemented in his memory, but he could not completely trust the way they were suddenly together and everything was happily ever after. Edward Elric doesn't believe in "happily ever after" because it isn't possible. The blonde pursed his lips in deep thought, remembering suddenly the events that had occurred just yesterday. Edward had opened up easily with his own dark past; what was so devastating in Roy's that he could even begin to say anything? All he had told him was that his family was in Japan. Worry tugged at Ed's stomach, anxiety coursing through his veins. Ed had not been one to accept ignorance easily. If there was something he didn't know, then he would go through hell and back to discover just what it was that he didn't know.

Edward's hand fell from Roy's to his shoulder and down to his waist. Maybe he was just being paranoid; besides the stunt he pulled with the hostess at dinner last night, and his strange behavior at school, Roy's actions had been genuine and loving—if not a little perverted—and he really had no reason not to trust him. In fact, when they had gotten back to the apartment last night, the two had gotten into bed and talked until Ed had dozed off. Roy had not pressured him into doing anything sexual—not that he would have completely objected—and had allowed the night to end rather peacefully. The blonde sighed softly and pulled Roy close absentmindedly; clearly, he was being a pessimist, as usual, and he probably just needed to lighten up. Roy had no secrets; there was no huge conspiracy behind him.

"And here I thought you were completely opposed to snuggling, Edward."

"Ack!" Edward started, "Bastard! How long have you been awake?"

"Good morning to you, too, squirt," Roy replied, casually avoiding the question, "how did you sleep?"

"Who are you calling so short that they wouldn't notice their boyfriend being awake?"

Roy chuckled, nuzzling into Ed's hair lovingly.

Edward grumbled, "I'm not short, bastard; and I slept just fine." Taking advantage of Roy being awake, he moved his boyfriend's hand and threw back the covers. "Ugh, thank God. It was too fucking hot in here." He released his hold on Roy and moved away from him, despite the frown forming on Roy's face.

The older sighed and sat up to stretch, "I guess this means it's time to get up?" It wasn't so much of a question as it was an admittance of defeat.

"Yep, 'cause you don't have any food, and you're gonna need to go get some goddamned groceries if you expect me to make you any food." Ed climbed out of bed and ran his fingers through his hair. "That's why I'm here, remember?"

Roy chuckled and moved from the bed into his bathroom, returning with a hairbrush in hand. He grabbed Ed's shoulder and leant down, "Let me do that for you."

"What?" Ed growled, "What do you think you're doing, bastard?"

"Helping you," Roy responded curtly, sitting adjacent to him on the bed and running the brush through his hair. "Stop squirming, I've done this before. I do have a sister, you know."

Ed's face lit up in embarrassment as Roy's fingers separated his hair into parts. As he twisted it into a braid, Ed tried his luck. "So, you have a sister? Older or younger."

A genuine smile spread on Roy's lips, exposing his teeth. It was one of those smiles that was a rarity and was meant to be admired, for Roy didn't smile like that very often. "Yeah, I do. Her name is Kora," he opened up easily. "She actually lives in California, one hundred or so miles from here. She's twenty-two." He tied the plait together with an elastic supplied by Edward, who eagerly spun around to meet Roy's eyes and listen to his story.

"She's basically my best friend in the whole world," he smiled, "I'm sure you can relate, you have Alphonse. Of course I have friends in school, but there's a bond that you get from a sibling that you really can't match. She helped me through a lot of stuff that I couldn't have gotten through on my own."

Edward felt a tiny, selfish pang of jealousy, but brushed it away at the hope of Roy telling him more about his personal life. "You have any other siblings?"

"Yeah, a little brother. He's twelve." His smile faded a little, "we're not all that close. James doesn't exactly approve of a lot of my, well," he sighed, "my choices. He's ridiculously judgmental for a seventh-grade kid.

"Oh, thanks for reminding me, I haven't called Kora in a couple days. She doesn't know about you," Roy smiled, leaning forward to steal a chaste kiss, and then leaving the room.

Ed sat, stunned. Roy's choices? What choices could he have made that would cause his own little brother to dislike him? Perhaps he hadn't been being paranoid after all.

—xx—

The scent of something buttery and breakfast-y lured Roy from the bathroom into the kitchen, where he was greeted with Edward frying eggs and bacon in one of his dress shirts. Roy frowned.

"What are you wearing?"

Ed looked up and grinned. "That nice shirt the hostess seemed to like so much last night." He looked down to flip the bacon. "Do you think she'll like it with grease and cheese all over it?"

Roy stared, but then looked down and chuckled. "Well, I guess I didn't really like it anyway, besides," he rounded the counter and wrapped his arms around him to purr in his ear, "it looks much better on you."

Edward blushed and softly nudged him away with his elbow. "Stop it, or I'll burn you with bacon grease."

Roy licked his lips and lifted the shirt, revealing the boxers hugging Ed's waist, completely ignoring his request. "Mmm, so gorgeous."

Ed spun around, cheeks flushed and eyebrows narrowed, spatula in hand. "Stop. Can't you keep your god damn libido in check for five minutes while I make you breakfast, you stupid bastard?"

Roy smiled, "You're making breakfast for me? Awww," he pinched Ed's cheek, "aren't you just the cutest?"

Edward grumbled and slapped Roy's hand away, flushing deeper before wheeling around, "N-no. What I meant was that I was making breakfast for me, but if there's some left, then maybe you can have some."

"Haha, sure, whatever." Roy opened the fridge to remove some juice as Ed plated up the hot food.

"There. Eat," Ed mumbled, taking a seat next to Roy as he poured himself a drink.

The two sat in silence, eating their identical breakfasts, until Roy asked out of the blue, "So, Ed, have you ever even been with a girl?"

The current piece of bacon Ed had been chewing was promptly replaced back on the plate it came from via spit-take, before looking up at his boyfriend, shocked. "W-what? You know I was a virgin before a couple nights ago!"

Roy laughed, "Yes, yes, I am well aware, but I was just wondering. I mean, you've had to have kissed a girl sometime, right? I mean, I'm not it, am I?"

Ed bit his lip, "Well… actually… in the seventh grade, I went to this party and we played that one game… er… spin the bottle or seven minutes in heaven, whatever it's called. I'd never been a big "party-goer" but my brother and Winry talked me into going. So, we were playing this game, and it was my turn to spin, and I got paired up with this really pretty girl, I think she was cheerleader or something. I dunno, everyone seemed pretty pumped about it. They were all congratulating me and stuff, and Russel pulled me aside to tell me to "be sure to touch those amazing tits" or something. I dunno, it seemed like I was getting pressured into it more than anything. But, she took my hand and pulled me into the back room and was like, "you're pretty cute" before she started attacking me with her lips."

"And…?" Roy asked, "Was it totally awful?"

Ed laughed, "No, not at all. I mean, kissing feels good or whatever. Her lips were soft and she was really into it because she was kinda slutty, I guess. I wasn't too into it, but it was nice."

Roy grinned, "Did you touch her boobs?"

Ed flushed, "Uh… yeah… I did." He looked away and admitted, "She took off her shirt about two minutes in, so I sorta felt obligated to. They were pretty big, I guess. I dunno. I didn't get what everyone was so excited about. It didn't feel so special to me."

Roy stared unbelievably for a few seconds before chuckling, "Wow. You are gay."

Ed grumbled, "You bastard. I shouldn't have even told you the story."

Roy frowned and pulled his lover out of his chair and into his lap, "Oh, come on, don't be like that." He nuzzled his neck, "I'm glad you feel that way. Do you know how the girls around you talk about you?"

Edward snorted, but didn't remove himself from the seat he had in Roy's lap. "What are you talking about?"

"A couple of girls on the tennis team and even a few on the cheerleading squad were talking about you, about how you were single and 'cute.'" Roy tightened his grip, "Can you imagine my jealousy when I heard? You're mine."

"Was I yours when this occurred?"

"Er… well, no. But I was still jealous." Roy laughed, "But now I know that that isn't a problem, because you don't even like girls."

"I'm sorry that I'm not like you! I won't fuck everything that moves!" Edward pouted and then stood from the chair and took the cleaned plates.

Roy frowned, hurt. "Hey… come on… don't be mean like that. I'm not doing that anymore." He moved across the floor and took his boyfriend into his arms. "I only want you, Edward. I love you."

Edward flushed, "I… love you, too."

"I'm a jealous guy," Roy admitted, "I don't wanna let you go. You being gay causes half the school to not even be an option for stealing you away."

Pulling out of Roy's embrace, Edward huffed and turned to him, "Look, you." He poked Roy's chest. "I'm not so easily stolen, like some ugly piece of jewelry or a fancy car or something." Roy raised an eyebrow with a grin. "I love you, you stupid bastard. Why would I run off with some stupid floozy after all I've been through just to get you?"

Roy smiled. Edward was a strange individual, indeed. "I need a translator for you, runt," he pulled him back into his arms, "if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were being sweet."

Before Edward could make some loud outburst about not being shorter than a grain of salt or something equally stupid, Roy captured him in a kiss, soft and loving, as if saying, "I never want to let you go," without uttering a word. Edward dropped his defenses and let Roy's lips move softly and slowly against his, let his heart race and pressed his chest against Roy's so he could feel their hearts flutter together.

When the two parted, they each smiled. Roy ran his fingers through Ed's loose hair and said, "I know, Ed. I know you aren't going anywhere."

"Good," Ed smiled, and then turned to finish the dishes, "don't go underestimating my feelings, Mustang. I've done a lot of stupid, reckless things to get here."

—xx—

"Okay, so I've made this list," Ed said, pointing at the piece of scrap paper in Roy's hand, "so go get these things and I'll make you dinner tonight."

"Yes, Ed," Roy grumbled, pulling on his jacket, "I know how grocery shopping works, shockingly. I've done it before."

"Well," Ed sighed, collapsing on the couch, "I don't want you coming back with all the wrong things. I don't wanna have to go out to eat again tonight and then have some slutty girl with big tits hitting on you again."

Roy laughed, "Okay, okay, I got you. I'll pick this stuff and few other things up. Just relax, and maybe put some clothes on, since you're still wearing my now grease-covered shirt."

"Aw, is it ruined?" Ed grinned, "That's too bad. Looks like you'll have to throw it out."

Roy chuckled and then leaned over Ed to kiss him, softly at first, but then Ed grabbed Roy's collar and pulled him closer and shoved his tongue in his mouth. Roy melted a little and fell on top of his boyfriend, and began unbuttoning his shirt. When it lay open, he ran both of his open palms against Ed's chest, sending chills down each of their spines. Roy began kissing down Ed's neck, biting softly, and then pulled him up by his shoulder to yank the shirt from his shoulders and throw it in the corner, and then let Ed do the same to his jacket and shirt. The two pressed their chests together and moaned softly, and then Roy collapsed on top of Ed, kissing his cheek softly.

"What," Roy asked, breathlessly, "was that all about?"

Ed grinned and kissed him again, "I just like knowing that I can do that pretty much whenever I want."

Chuckling, Roy sat up to put his shirt and jacket back on, "exhilarating, isn't it?"

"Yeah—wait!" Ed growled, "you arrogant bastard!"

"Alright, I'm outta here," Roy leaned down, kissing his nose, "see you in an hour or two, shrimp!"

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT THE SHRIMP IN THE SEA WOULD TOWER OVER HIM AND HE WOULD BE CARRIED AWAY BY THE SMALLEST CURRENT?" Ed opened his eyes, but realized he was shouting at a closed door, and growled. "Bastard."

And then, he realized he was alone in Roy's apartment. What, exactly, was he supposed to do for the next hour or so? He stretched out on the couch and yawned, before standing and moving to the bathroom. A shower seemed like a good start.

—xx—

Ed stared down the journal on the bedside table for a second time as he towel dried his hair. He had a good thirty minutes to snoop on his boyfriend, and it was even more tempting now that Roy had been so secretive and curt with all of his answers the previous evening. Ed tossed the towel across the room and put his hand on the book, it's rough cover inviting him for a second time together. Ed gulped, the grabbed the journal back up. It fell open to the last entry before he could find where he left off. Curiously, he read:

November 20

I can't deal with these sleepless nights. I want to sleep, but every time I close my eyes, I see him. I don't wanna dream about the stupid little runt. I thought I was past all this. I thought the gay thing was just some passing phase or something that was special with Maes and I. I didn't know that it was permanent. And I didn't know that I'd be getting all hot and bothered over some stupid freshman. I keep having these dirty dreams about a kid I barely know. I just want to get him the fuck out of my head. How am I supposed to do that? I wish I knew. I was starting to feel like I was finally getting over Maes. Why is Edward taking his place? And I why am I so scared to let him take his place?

Edward blinked. Who is this "Maes" person? Roy mentioned him earlier in the journal… maybe he should read back. It just… felt so wrong, prying into Roy's past like he had some right to, like he was suddenly allowed to read his journal and know his past just because they'd slept together.

But, Edward couldn't resist. There was a plethora of information in his hands, right here, about the person who had suddenly just taken first place in his life, and he couldn't just put it back. If Roy wasn't going to tell him what was going on, he was just going to have to figure it out for himself.

Ed flipped the pages back to where he had been before, looking for August 4th. Upon finding it, he gulped, and continued where he'd left off.

Also, we've started talking about Maes. She's being really cool about the whole thing, but this is the most confusing thing I've ever dealt with. It's getting to the point where I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, he's my best friend, but lately, we've been staring at each other like there's something else there or something. I actually feel awkward around him. I don't understand. We've been together our whole lives. What's changing?

Ed raised his eyebrow quizzically and turned the page. What… what was this?

August 17

Summer break is over tomorrow and fall session is about to start, but I wish that things would just slow down. I need way more time to figure out what that kiss meant before I can go back to school and see Maes every day. Maes kissed me. We were sitting out on the balcony two nights ago in our sleeping bags, looking at the city, and we had one of those weird staring matches again where neither of us wants to look away, and he took off his glasses, then took off mine, and he kissed me. My first kiss, and it's from my best friend. I don't even know how to feel about this, I can't even tell Kora. I mean, I think I liked it. What does that mean? We haven't talked since, haven't even seen each other. I have no idea what's changed. But, after we kissed, neither of us said anything. He just sat with me, then grabbed my hand, and I was okay with that.

Am I falling in love with my best friend? What does that mean for me? I mean, he's a guy! I just need more time.

What the hell was this? Roy had… a boyfriend? Or at least, almost had one? How much about him did he not know? He looked up at the clock in the room and saw that Roy had left thirty minutes ago. He certainly did not have enough time to read all the way through to the end. He flipped through the pages, but stopped at a page that was worn and the writing on the page left deep marks in the paper, like someone had pressed the pen quite hard in haste.

April 15

I just don't know what to do anymore. This is all my fault. I can't even go see him in the hospital. God dammit I love him so fucking much. I don't wanna let him go. They're making me leave, they think it's too dangerous for me to live here anymore. But I don't care, I just wanna hold his hand and be by him through all this. I know that I could have prevented this but I was too stupid and now he's hurting. The bastards broke his fucking legs! I just wanted to love him. I just wanted him by my side. He was everything. Now I have to leave and go to another fucking country because I was stupid and got us hurt. I just don't know what to do. I want to just break down and cry. Maes is everything. I don't want anything else. But I have to leave.

I just don't know.

Ed dropped the journal on the ground, causing the pages to flutter and then the cover to slam shut. "Oh… my god…" Ed whispered. Roy had a past. He had a whole life that Edward didn't even know about. How the fuck had he even fallen in love with him? He barely knew him! What happened with that Maes boy? How did he get hurt? And from the looks of the journal entry, Roy didn't leave out of love with him. He'd never heard Roy talk about anything like that. How did he know that he wasn't still in love with this boy?

Ed took a deep breath and picked the journal up, calming his suddenly jumpy nerves. He had no idea when any of this had happened, there was no year on the journal entry. It could have been years ago. There was no way that Roy was still into his past boyfriend. He'd told him that he loved him. Ed sighed his relief—he'd been too quick to judge the situation, he was being paranoid. He replaced the journal on the bedside table, and leaned back to let his heart slow.

Then, he heard a ringing from the other room that didn't sound like his own cell phone. Edward chuckled, "That forgetful bastard. He must have left his phone here." He pushed himself off the bed and went to go inspect the ringing source.

Ed picked the phone up off the counter in the kitchen. It was one of those obnoxiously complicated texting phones that you had to flip open to reveal a keyboard. Ed had never been too interested in such phones. Winry would have gone bat-shit over it, though. He chuckled and flipped it open, but then he stopped, breathless.

The text was from a "Maes Hughes."

Edward bit his lip. So much for everything being over.

"No," he shook his head, trying to remain positive and practical, "they were best friends, I'm sure that they're still just friends."

But, still, he opened the text. And all of his worst fears were proved exactly right when he read,

"I know, Roy. I'll always love you, too."

—xx—

A/N: Hi guys! I'm still alive! And I still wanna write!

maria