Disclaimer: I do not own Pokémon. And I also do not own any of the clichéd standard openings I use. Those are just products of others' uninspired imaginations.

The alarm clock rang on his bedside table; a loud, incessant screeching.

WOBUFFET! WOBUFFET! WOB—

In a single movement, he'd squished the little alarm clock. Squished, because it was made of some synthetic rubber, but that only made it more satisfying.

Yawning, he got out of bed, his eyes bleary. Stumbling over to the mirror, he smoothed his hair through as he fingered the calendar he'd hung over it.

April 1st: Pokémon collection date!

And all of a sudden he was awake. After taking a quick shower and pulling on his clothing, he sped down the stairs into the living room, where he crashed into his parents, both of them struggling to pull a giant Magikarp through the kitchen door.

"Awww man… is that going to be breakfast…?"

His mother shrugged apologetically. "Well, it was this or the Seaking… and… well Magikarp can't fight back."

Shaking his head, he helped them fit it (somehow) into the kitchen before stepping out of the house. Checking his watch, he found that half an hour had already passed. Shocked, he dashed the rest of the way to the Pokémon Laboratory, the head of which was a certain Professor Goldenrain.

A/N: I could use Professor Baobab but I found this cooler... oh wells.

He ran through the double doors of the Laboratory as though they were nothing. Actually, that was because he didn't realize they were there.

Next time, I've gotta remember to wait until the sliding doors are open before rushing in.

Shaking his head clear, he walked deliberately through the few confused lab assistants and up to said professor who was, truth be told, drooling over his keyboard, asleep.

"Prooofesssorrr!"

As he shouted the word into the professor's ear, he was more than a tad impatient. To think, that on such a day, the most important of his life; that the professor would actually be asleep!

As he shouted the word once again, the professor raised his hand…

And brought it down on our hero's head. At least it served its purpose though. He'd stopped the alarm-clock routine.

"Just… a few more minutes… what!"

And all of a sudden he was awake. Looking around blearily, the first thing his eyes caught on was obviously…

"Ash! What are you doing here at… three in the morning!"

The boy's name was Ash. Not because of that old clichéd Pokémon Master, but because the author (Yours truly) happens to share the same –

"Err yeah, I thought I didn't want to be late so…"

The elderly professor shook his head. Around him, the lab assistants had finally cleared out of their hiding places, assured that there wasn't going to be any mass destruction going on.

"So… Professor… I heard the three earliest people were going to get Deoxys…?"

The Prof blanched as he heard this. If he had known Ash'd be getting his Pokémon that day…

"Eh… well the truth is… we don't have any Deoxys." He shrunk away as the young boy's face began to contort itself into increasingly… contorted shapes. "Erm… April Fools'?"

The boy gritted his teeth. "Fine, what do you have for me?"

The laboratory wasn't exactly the largest one; in fact, it consisted mainly of a single large room with computers along the sides and a large table in the middle. It was to this table that Ash now rushed, for the obvious reason that it held six Pokéballs. The Professor followed behind, unsure of what to say.

"Well… here we have six different Pokémon… choose any one of them."

The boy picked up the first Pokéball, before stopping to wonder how to let the Pokémon out. The professor sighed and touched his finger to a tiny button positioned along the side of the ball. A Caterpie appeared.

"Ahh… I'm guessing I'm not choosing that."

In quick succession he released all the other Pokéballs, impatient. So now there were four Caterpies and a Pidgey. Oh wait. Five. The last was trapped in the Pidgey's mouth. He watched as Professor Goldenrain wrestled it out of the Pidgey's grasp.

"I thought you said six different Pokémon."

At this, the professor sighed. He turned to his lab assistants, or assistant, rather. The rest had miraculously escaped unnoticed. The single assistant probably hadn't passed his evasion course back at Assistant Academy.

A/N: Alliteration. Woo.

Looking around, the poor guy finally realized he was alone on this one.

"Well, er… you see… you told each of us to get either a Caterpie, Weedle, Pidgey, Rattata, or a Nidoran of either gender… well the easiest happened to be a Caterpie… and… yeah about the Pidgey… that was me. I kinda couldn't find any more Caterpies so…"

The professor slapped his forehead. "Ah… well I guess I can't blame you. Fine, Ash, I want you to take this Ultra Ball and catch the first thing you see outside."

A few moments later, Ash was back in the room. "How do I get a Pokémon into the Pokéball?"

A/N: Yeah, this is just testing for reactions… if you liked it or hated it… either way, do review! I tried to make it as… erm… un-clichéd in a clichéd way…