A belated thank you to my beta Rinne who does wonderful work and stops me from looking illiterate
Tony closed his eyes as the elevator closed behind Gibbs. He never thought it would come to this. Never. It took a second for him to realise everyone was looking at him. He lifted his head up and opened his eyes. Their eyes were so expectant. Gibbs had handed over the torch, a torch that felt like it weighed a tonne on his shoulders.
"McGee," he spoke softly. "Take Abby home." McGee opened his mouth to protest but decided against it. He nodded firmly. He walked over to Abby and led her gently to the elevator. Tony heard her sniff as she tried to hold back the floodgates. Tony turned to Ziva. "Take the director home." Director Sheppard walked down the stairs to join Tony and Ziva.
"I'm still Director around here Agent DiNozzo, you can't order me around." Tony knew her brusque tone was just a reaction to Gibbs leaving. Tony shook his head.
"You spent more time than any of us at Gibbs' bedside. You're tired, get some sleep." The director smiled weakly at Tony's thoughtfulness. Ziva slid her arm over Director Sheppard's shoulders and followed McGee and Abby to the elevator. At a second thought, Ziva spun round to face Tony.
"What about you?" she asked.
He nodded with a forced smile. "I'll be okay."
If she knew he was lying she didn't say anything. She turned back and joined the others. Tony closed his eyes as the elevator closed behind the group and let out a sigh. He brought his hand up to his face and rubbed the weariness out his eyes. He walked over to Gibbs'- no, his desk and placed Gibbs' gun and badge in the top drawer where they would forever stay. He thought about getting some work done. In the empty squad room he could start his report. But at that moment, there was something he needed to do more. He waited until he knew his team-mates had left the building before riding the elevator to the car park. He climbed into his mustang and started the engine. It purred softly but Tony wasn't in the right state of mind to appreciate his pride possession. He drove without his usual enthusiasm of blaring radio and he barely even recognised the streets he passed as he headed to a favourite haunt. He arrived, shut off the engine and escaped the small confines of the car. He took a breath of fresh air as he stood alone in the car park, the damp smell of rain filling his lungs.
A cool breeze whipped past him, snapping him out of his reverie. He walked into the building and headed straight for the bar. He slid onto a stool and leant heavily on the beer stained wood. The bartender walked up to him and poured him a drink as if he'd done it every night. Tony nodded as the bartender handed him the glass half filled with the bar's most expensive whisky. Tony slung the glass back and swallowed the drink in one fluid motion. The liquid burned his throat but Tony paid no attention to it. He'd had better, but this stuff was doing the trick.
"Rough night?" the bartender asked. Tony placed the glass on the bar and tapped his finger on the wood. The bartender filled the glass again.
"I got promoted," Tony replied before downing the second glass.
The bartender frowned as he refilled Tony's glass. "So why aren't you out celebrating?" he asked, eyeing up Tony's solemn expression.
"It's not that kind of promotion," a voice from behind answered. Tony didn't need to look to know who it was. Gibbs slid onto the stool next to Tony and signalled the bartender to give him whatever Tony was drinking.
"I thought you had left?" Tony asked as he took a gulp of the amber liquid.
"Flight's not for another couple of hours," Gibbs replied. He watched Tony circle the rim of his glass with one finger. "I thought I would find you here." Tony nodded, but didn't meet Gibbs' strong gaze. "Is everything okay?" Gibbs asked, knowing he'd probably regret asking.
Tony forced a sarcastic smirk. "Everything's just dandy Gibbs." He downed the rest of the drink and called the bartender to fill it up again. "What are you doing here?"
Gibbs shrugged.
"Well, if you're not here for any particular reason, do you mind leaving me to get drunk in peace."
Gibbs shook his head. "You've got work tomorrow, won't be a good idea to turn up with a hangover."
"I've worked with hangover's before."
"Tomorrow you'll be lead agent."
"Do you think I need reminding of that?" Tony snapped. Drink seemed to make Tony less bothered that Gibbs could still kick his ass.
Gibbs took a gulp then slammed the glass down on the bar. "What's your problem Tony?" Tony stayed silent. "Look I-" Gibbs stopped when Tony suddenly reached into his trouser pocket and pulled out his wallet. He pulled out more than enough money and placed it on the bar.
"Keep the change," he told the bartender. Gibbs raised an eyebrow, Tony had given the bartender almost double. Tony slipped off the stool and began walking away. Gibbs quickly paid for his own drink and followed Tony. He opened the door to the bar and watched Tony stalk towards his car. Gibbs hurried to catch up, they were going to talk about what was bothering Tony, even if Tony didn't want to.
"Tony, stop!" Gibbs shouted. Tony froze obediently, only a step away from his car, his keys already in his hand for a speedy getaway. Gibbs swiftly joined him. He watched Tony sway slightly, he hadn't seen how much Tony had actually drunk.
"What the hell is going on with you?"
Tony spun round, anger evident in his eyes. "You don't just drop a bomb like that and leave Gibbs!" Tony shouted. "You don't just leave like that!" Tony shook his head with a laugh. "I don't know whether I want to punch you or hug you." Gibbs took a step back; he didn't really want to be punched or hugged. "The one thing I have always depended on is you, Gibbs. I depend on you to get the answers out of the scumbags; I depend on you to find me when I've been kidnapped or when I'm trapped in a shipping container. You know we were stuck in that cold, dark, metal box, with no way out and men with big guns were coming back and were going to try and kill us, but none of that mattered cos I knew you were coming for us."
"Tony, let me take you home-" Gibbs tried to interrupt but Tony continued.
"What kind of a lead agent could I be? Last time I was in charge I nearly got an innocent kid shot! My team doesn't respect me! Hell, they barely tolerate me. I'm not even half the agent you are." Gibbs took a step forward and slapped Tony's head hard. Tony's hand shot up and instantly began rubbing the sore spot. He glared at Gibbs.
"What was that for?"
"Listen carefully, because I am only going to say this once," Gibbs warned, making sure he kept eye contact with Tony. "You are just as good an agent as me and I wouldn't have handed the team over to you if I didn't think you could handle it."
"Why the hell are you leaving Gibbs?" Tony asked, a lot more calm.
"When my mentor quit, I asked the same question. I couldn't understand why he would just desert me like that. Don't tell me I don't know what it's like because I do."
"Is that what you want? You turned into your mentor Gibbs, and now you're trying to turn me into you?"
"Is that so bad?"
"It is if I head down the same path and end up quitting like you."
Gibbs laughed. "And is that so different from you moving from PD department to PD department every two years huh? You have less loyalty to the job than I do!"
Tony shook his head "I'm loyal to you, not the job."
Gibbs would never tell Tony how much that meant to him. He softened his gaze. "Things can't stay the same forever, Tony. What, you thought you'd be my second in command until I died of old age?"
"I didn't-" Tony paused to take a breath, the cool air making it visible in the darkness. "I just wanted some kind of warning. I'm not ready."
Gibbs tilted his head to one side. "Why do you say that?"
"I don't know how to lead a team."
Gibbs stared at Tony incredulously. "What are you talking about, you've proven this year that you can do it. You didn't order the snipers to kill Kody Meyers at the school."
"You remember that?"
"Yeah, DiNozzo, I remember that. It was your gut telling you not to shoot. If anyone else was in charge, Kody would be dead right now."
"You really think I can do this?"
Gibbs lifted his hand up. "Don't make me hit you again!"
Tony lifted his own hands up in mock surrender and smiled.
"Just listen to your gut, listen to your team and most of all listen to what is not being said."
Tony nodded as he eagerly took in the advice. "You got any more wise words, Boss?"
"Yeah, stop calling me boss."
Tony smirked. "I'll work on that." Gibbs motioned to Tony's car and held out his hands. He'd had less to drink. Tony begrudgingly handed the keys over. He knew how Gibbs drove and didn't want his precious Mustang to end up in a car crash.
"Few more things to remember," Gibbs began as they climbed into the car. "Don't let Fornell get one over on you, always make Sheppard believes she's in charge and always always make sure you give Abs her hourly dose of caff-pow."
Tony laughed. "Will do."
Gibbs started the engine and began driving in the direction of Tony's home. Tony breathed more easily. He barely even recognised the streets he passed as excitement overrode all other emotions. It finally hit him. He was in charge. He could order McGee and Ziva to do anything he wanted. He could tape their prized possessions to cut outs at the shooting range and make them search miles of forest for a single shell casing. He could send them dumpster diving and to question batty old ladies and bratty kids. Most of all, he'd be the one receiving the medals. No more keeping Gibbs' medals in a drawer, jealous that, once more, Gibbs had got the recognition. Tony smiled. He already had his acceptance speech ready.
"You know there a few good perks about being team leader," Gibbs began.
Tony raised an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Sure, better parking space, better pay check, higher clearance."
Tony grinned widely, already thinking up torturous jobs for McGee and Ziva. "Cool," he answered.