Well, this is my second fanfic. I had one out a long time ago called magical handcuffs but that was several years back. Don't even remember my pen name. Lol. I love to put characters in funny and awkward positions and see what happens. This was actually something me and my beta roleplayed with these characters, though we have yet to finish the roleplay. I loved it so much that I decided to write up a fanfic following the same basic idea. Anyways, I hope that you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist, what more can I say?

One might say that the office of Colonel Roy Mustang could easily be compared to a playground. While there may not be any swings to laugh on, or a slide to ride, the atmosphere was still rather juvenile, especially for an office setting. Often times one would find at least one or two people there day dreaming. Sometimes they were making strange 'heroic' poses, or bragging to the others about what he did during the weekend. The girl in the office was feared as if she had cooties. Rumors were swapped and teasing was often a daily part of their life. Even the occasional bully entered the room.

Now there were two people in the office that bicker every chance they get. It really didn't matter what the subject was on and where they were, they never turned down the opportunity to fight with one another. Now this could go in two ways, we could keep the analogy of the play ground scene and point out that when a little boy liked someone they often times teased them. However the normal visitors of this playground didn't really like to keep with that. Hearing the senseless banter so many times, it sounded more like an old married couple.

Married couple? Why that gave Havoc the most wonderful idea. Oh yes, a wonderful plan to get back at the bickering pair, for all the inconvenience of listening to them, or hiding from them as sometimes things tittered to the violent side. That's when unidentified flying objects normally came into play. Usually these objects where all going in the same path, but every once in awhile a few would take a detour.

He waited until April 1st was around. He got those in the office to agree to play along with this, even Riza, which was a miracle in of itself. The stage was set, everything was ready, in fact Ed was already there arguing with the Colonel. Riza handed Ed a few papers that he needed to sign. It was one of those things that Ed had to do every time he came back from a mission. Then Roy would sign the parts he had to. It was perfect.

Roy stared in amusement at the petite blonde who looked like a tea pot that had been left on the stove for too long. "Well, Edward, no one told you to go and destroy those buildings." Right now Roy was discussing the fact that Ed had managed to collapse three buildings in this one city during his latest mission. Ed wasn't happy to hear it was being taken from his check either. It would take several checks to make up the cost too.

Edward sneered, they had been at this for awhile and right now all he wanted to do was leave, take a shower and get some sleep, maybe get some food if he was lucky. "Fine, is that all you have to say Colonel Bastard?" He snapped.

"Yes, Fullmetal, you are dismissed." Roy said making a shooing motion with his hand at him.

Edward gave him one last glare before turning on his heel to march out of the room, his sour mood written on his face. Before he could open the door, Hawkeye cleared her throat, "Before you leave Edward, I believe we have a situation on our hands that needs your attention." She said.

Ed stopped and looked at her curiously. Roy as well wondered what could possibly need both of their attention that he hadn't heard about. She pulled a paper out of the stake and handed it to Roy. Roy gave her a funny look before reading over the document. His eyebrows furrowed wondering why the hell he was reading a marriage license that is until he got to the bottom and saw both his and Edward's name scratched in on the bottom. His eyes bugged, "What the hell?" He exclaimed.

First chapter is done. Sorry it's so short, but that just seemed like a good place to stop. Stick with me to see what happens to our two protagonists, and please don't forget to review. Any comments or suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks a bunch!