Okay, here's another one from me. I've got about 20 new stories that I've each got about one chapter to (yes that is what I have been doing the past couple of weeks when I should have been working on The Last Reality) and I'm formulating a plan. I'm going to post a new story every so often (I'm thinking every week) and just pick one to work on when my main ones are giving me problems. That way, I'll get a lot of diversity. And in the long run, I'll get more done than when I would have doing just one at a time. Yes, I know, my logic is a little whacked, but hey, that's just part of who I am!
All right, this one is actually one that I have been planning to do for a long time, but I never actually got around to doing it. I've got about three of my friends reading it right now and they suggested that this be one of the ones I start with in my experiment. This is a high school fanfic and I'm changing just a few things. You'll notice some of the changes as I go along. I hope you all enjoy!
Life Less Ordinary "New Guy"Professor Mimid continued to drone on about the different effects that the Sorceress Wars had on the separate countries even though no one was paying any attention. In the back of the sleepy classroom, Rinoa thought that she was going to die from premature boredom. She tried to force her eyes open, but failed miserably at the feat. Selphie Tilmitt, her best friend, nudged her side sleepily and tossed something into her lap. It was a note. She opened it as Selphie woke herself up and peeked over her shoulder.
"What's it say?" she whispered excitedly.
"I'm getting there. Hold on!" Rinoa whispered back, pulling the note open.
Rinoa,
Hey. What's up? Guess what? A really good friend of mine is coming here from Esthar. I'll bet anything that you, Selphie, and Quistis will want to meet him.
Later Days. –Seifer"A new guy?" Selphie whispered. "A friend of Seifer's?"
Rinoa was just as shocked as Selphie was. "I hope he's not as crazy…" With that the two girls burst into a giggling fit and had to stifle their sound so that Professor Mimid wouldn't hear them, not that the old man would ever notice. He was half deaf to begin with.
"I wonder if he's cute?" Selphie whispered, keeping her head down.
"Probably," Rinoa answered, staring at the words on the paper in her lap. "Considering the way Seifer said that we'd want to meet him." Selphie gave Rinoa a huge smile.
"Hey, don't forget about Irvine," Rinoa warned. Selphie pouted and went back to her sleepy state.
The bell that ended second period came and was greatly welcomed as Professor Mimid released them. Seifer caught up with Rinoa and Selphie as they left the classroom.
"Hey, Rin! Did you get my note?" Seifer asked as they walked down the hall.
"Yeah, I got it," she answered a little off-handedly while she dug in her pockets for a piece of gum.
"So, when's he getting here? What's he like? Does he have a girlfriend?" Selphie was just bursting with questions. After all, "curious minds want to know." That was her motto.
"Selphie, don't forget about Irvine!" Rinoa exclaimed, laughing. "You don't want him to get jealous, now do you?"
"Well, he doesn't seem to mind making me jealous when he flirts with anything that has boobs and a pretty face! So why can't I?" she retorted.
"Selphie, to answer your questions, he'll probably get here either today or tomorrow. You'll have to see for yourself what he's like. No, hell no, he doesn't have a girlfriend. Between you and me, he's a little picky," Seifer answered with a laugh.
The two girls just rolled their eyes.
"Geez, I'm starved!" Selphie exclaimed. "I wonder what we're having for lunch? I hope its not hotdogs…again."
"Well, if it is, then Zell will sure be happy." Rinoa replied. She didn't really mind hotdogs, but after a while, they did get old. Literally.
"Man, I get sick of hotdogs!" Seifer groaned. "Let's just pray for something that's not mixed with other meat that's just been lying around."
"Oh, gross!" Selphie squealed.
"Hey, Seifer?" Rinoa walked beside him. "How come your friend is moving here? If he's living in Esthar, why would he want to come to such a small place like Balamb?"
"It was his mom's decision. That's all I know." He answered her, not knowing anymore than she did.
"I know if I lived in Esthar I wouldn't want to come here! Esthar is like the shopping capital of the world! That place has everything!" Selphie exclaimed happily.
"Yeah, along with crime and too many bad influences," Seifer added somewhat sadly.
"Is that why you moved here, too?" Rinoa questioned him, only receiving a nod, nothing more.
"Selphie, sometimes I think that you're becoming like Quistis. You've been so wrapped up about boys and shopping that you've turned into her." Rinoa tried to look seriously at her friend but failed and the two dissolved into another fit of giggles.
"Well, I'll catch you two later at lunch. I've got to get to next period before Professor 'Screech' yells at me again. Later days!" he said to them and took off down the other hall, meeting up with Zell and Irvine, who Selphie deliberately ignored.
"Why does he always say that even though we're going to see him in, like, an hour and a half at lunch?" Selphie asked Rinoa while she watched Seifer's retreating back. Irvine tried to make eye contact with her, but she kept on ignoring him.
"I don't know. This is Seifer we're talking about. Why does he do all the other stupid things that he's so well known for?" Rinoa was watching Irvine try to get Selphie to look at him. "You're still mad at him, aren't you?" she asked of her friend.
"Yep. And I've decided that I'm going to give him a taste of his own medicine," she replied, not even looking at the cowboy.
"Has he said anything yet?" Rinoa and Selphie were headed to third block which was Pre-Calculus. How fun!
"Nope, and I could care less if he did." She was actually being mean, which was out of character for her. She was usually extremely nice and sweet to everyone, but if the truth be told, Irvine had done some pretty stupid things that hurt her more than anyone else.
"But what if he doesn't care? What if he completely ignores your attempt to 'give him a taste of his own medicine?'" Rinoa and Selphie made it with time to spare and sat down at their desks.
"So what are we talking about?" Quistis had come in and took her seat in front of Rinoa.
"I'm giving Irvine a taste of his own medicine. Since he's always looking at other girls and trying to get with them, even though he says to me that I'm the only girl for him, I'm going to do the same. That should get his attention, don't you think?" Selphie replied rather smugly.
"Oh, yeah! If you make them jealous, they'll come crawling. It works like a charm," Quistis agreed solemnly with Selphie.
"Then how come it hasn't worked for you yet?" Rinoa demanded, slamming her book onto her desk in aggravation.
"I'm just taking my time, that's all. I'm playing Seifer right into my hands. Rinoa, you have to remember: this process takes time, and I know how to play my cards," Quistis replied so confidently that Rinoa had to hide her amusement so she wouldn't offend the blonde.
"I think that's code for: 'I haven't found a guy good enough to make Seifer jealous.'" Selphie laughed. Quistis stuck her tongue out.
"Don't you mean: 'I can't get a guy good enough to make Seifer jealous?'" Rinoa corrected her, joining in her laughter. Selphie and Rinoa were rolling with laughter, and Quistis crossed her arms over her chest, slightly disgusted.
"Tsk. Fine. I get it. Ha. Ha. ha. That's very funny, Rinoa. I just can't control my laughter. It's so funny, it hurts." Quistis stated very dryly. "At least I have an active relationship with the opposite sex, Rinoa!" she pointed out.
"Hey, you don't have to bring that in! Just because I'm not interested in having a boyfriend right now doesn't mean that I don't have an active relationship with the 'opposite sex.'" Now it was Rinoa's turn to pout and cross her arms over her chest.
"Hmm. Sure. Right. Whatever you say, Rinoa." Quistis looked rather satisfied with herself, and Selphie covered her mouth, giggling.
"All right, class. Settle down. We've got a lot of work to do today." The Pre-Cal teacher, Professor Fitzgerald, came into the room. The entire class, a class of juniors and seniors, all got extremely quiet and for good reason, too. Professor Fitzgerald was an old, evil woman with short, red curly hair, tiny black eyes, wrinkles that she covered with layers of foundation, tight, thin lips that were plastered with bright red lipstick that clashed with her hair, and a temper that set to go off at any given time. If you got on her bad side, she made your life a living hell.
"Here we go," Selphie whispered as the Evil Eyes of Professor Fitzgerald scanned the room.
"It's going to be a long block," Rinoa whispered back, avoiding Professor Fitzgerald's horrid glances.
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"Ooh! That woman makes my skin crawl!" Selphie exclaimed as she sat down at their usual lunch table. She had goose bumps all over her arms.
"Tell me about it! She is so evil!" Quistis agreed, "And her outfits always clash. I think she dressed herself in the dark. Yuk!" She stuck out her tongue in disgust.
"At least we only have to deal with her for one semester. It could be worse, you know. It could be much worse!" Rinoa pointed out.
"What could be worse?" Zell asked, joining them as usual.
"Probably you breath! Whew!" Irvine joked sitting down beside Selphie who immediately moved to another seat. He looked at everyone else with a look on his face that clearly said, "What'd I do?"
"My breath doesn't stink!" Zell exclaimed. He then looked at Rinoa and Selphie. "Does it?" They shook their heads, and he felt better.
"It will after you eat all those hotdogs!" Selphie exclaimed. "I think I may have just lost my appetite." She pushed her tray away from her. Yes, they were having hotdogs again.
"Hey! What's wrong with hotdogs?" Zell demanded, looking over his tray of nothing but hotdogs fondly.
"Besides everything? You don't want me to go into detail," she answered with sass.
"Please, don't waste your breath, Selphie. It'll just fall on deaf ears, anyway." Rinoa smiled.
"You're probably right."
"Hey! Where's Seifer? He hasn't shown up yet!" Quistis suddenly realized that her current target wasn't here.
"Maybe he really did mean it when he said 'Later days!'" Selphie cried out.
"Was he in third block, guys?" Quistis turned to Irvine and Zell.
"Yeah. He's probably on his way. Either that or he's skipping," Irvine replied.
"He's probably skipping? Why on Earth would he skip lunch? Are you that big of an idiot?" Quistis demanded of Irvine who only shrugged.
"Well, he could have left early, you know," Zell said through a mouthful of hotdogs. Quistis made this disgusted, sour face.
"I bet it has something to do with that new guy!" Selphie pointed out quickly. "He said that his friend should be here either today or tomorrow. Maybe he's here!"
"Nah. Seifer wouldn't skip for that, I don't think." Quistis was pretty sure that Seifer wouldn't do such a thing.
"Geez. Professor 'Screech' is such a witch!" Ah, the voice that made everyone relax. Well, sort of. Seifer had just sat down and had a very weary look on his face. "Would you believe that she held me after class just so she could tell me that I always disrupt her class! I hate that woman!" He groaned and put his head down on the table.
"Well, there you have it! He isn't skipping!" Quistis announced happily.
"Who said anything about anyone skipping?" Seifer lifted his head, a little confused.
"We didn't know where you were, that's all, and someone thought that you might have been skipping." Quistis gave Irvine an evil eye. Maybe Professor Fitzgerald had taught her something because he squirmed like a worm.
"No! I wasn't skipping! I was just with Professor Screech! She's mad at me again, but you know what's funny? I didn't say anything in class today!" Seifer laughed.
The bell suddenly rang, announcing that lunch was over, and everyone headed to the fourth and final block of the day.
Rinoa was glad that this day was almost done. She couldn't wait for the weekend to start, but she had this feeling that it was going to be a very interesting weekend.
"See you later, Rinny!" Selphie called, heading to the Science Hall. She waved to her and the rest of the gang as they parted until after school.
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Seifer was sitting on the hood of his black Cobra, waiting for the rest of the gang to show up. School had finally ended and the weekend was here. He had plans for this weekend and did not intend on waiting for his friends to get outside the whole time.
For the past hour, he'd been texting his buddy who was currently on the drive here to Balamb. He figured he was about two hours away, and Seifer couldn't wait. His best friend ever was finally moving to Balamb. Ever since he moved, there had been talk that his best friend would move too. Seifer couldn't wait until his best friend came.
"Hey, Seifer!" Quistis called, coming over with Selphie and Rinoa. Now, all they had to do was wait for Irvine and Zell.
"So, it's Friday. What are we going to do?" Selphie asked, finally joining the guys. "I hope it has something to do with fun."
"Yeah," Seifer displayed a huge grin. "It's going to be fun, don't worry."
"Okay, spill it! What are you plotting?" Quistis demanded, leaning against his car.
"Ah, nothing. I just have this feeling that this weekend was going to be really, really fun." Seifer jumped off the hood and around to the driver's side. Irvine and Zell had just come over.
"Okay, what's the plan?" Zell asked, throwing his books into his tiny car.
"We should meet at Joe's!" Selphie said suddenly, excitedly. "There's always stuff to do at Joe's!"
"What time?" Rinoa followed Zell's suit and threw her books into her own car.
"I don't know." Seifer shrugged. His phone started to vibrate again. He looked down at it and started laughing.
"What's so funny?" Quistis asked him, peering over his shoulder.
"Nothing," he chuckled a bit and opened the car door. "How about we all meet in an hour?" He knew that he would be late because he was going to wait for his friend. But where's the harm in being fashionably late?
"Sounds like a plan!" Selphie said grinning broadly. She got into Rinoa's car, letting Irvine know that she was still mad at him.
It was then that they all parted. Things were going to be very interesting later that day and probably throughout the whole weekend.
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"Seifer was certainly in a good mood today, wasn't he?" Selphie stated, following Rinoa upstairs to the raven-haired girl's room. They were going to burn time at Rinoa's house before going down to Joe's.
"Yeah, he was. I guess he's just really happy that his friend is coming."
"I wonder what he'll be like? I hope he's not, like, really weird." She almost said like Seifer but thought against it. Come on, the boy wasn't even here to defend himself.
"Selphie, if he's a friend of Seifer's then he's bound to be weird!" Rinoa noticed that Selphie didn't take a crack at Seifer and decided that she would. Hey, someone's got to do the dirty work.
"Yeah, you're right!" Selphie broke out into a fit laughter, rolling around on Rinoa's bedroom floor. Rinoa just found Selphie funny and used that as her source for laughter.
"Oh! That's a good one!" Selphie finally ceased her laughing about five minutes later.
There was a knock at the door and Rinoa's mom, Julia, popped her head in.
"Hey girls! Listen, Rinny, before I head off to work, I've got some good news!" Julia looked rather excited.
"What?" Rinoa sat down at her desk and looked at her mom.
"My old friend, Raine, is moving here to Balamb! Isn't that exciting?"
"Raine?" Why did that name sound so familiar?
"Yes, Raine. She's been just about my best friend since junior high school! She's moving here and I do believe that her sons and nephews are coming, too. I think. I'm not too sure. Well, I just thought I should tell you." Her mother retreated again, and the two girls heard her footsteps descend the stairs.
"Hey, Rinny? You don't think that this friend of your mom's has anything to do with Seifer's friend, do you?" Selphie looked at Rinoa who was still staring at the spot where her mother had just stood.
"I don't think so. This friend of my mom's is from Galbadia. That's where they met, anyway, and Seifer's buddy is coming from Esthar. I don't think they have anything to do with each other." Rinoa sure hoped they didn't.
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"I didn't think it was possible to have a town this incredibly small." A brown-haired guy said to Seifer, getting out of a black mustang. Two other guys followed out of the car.
"You'll get used to it, don't worry." Seifer smiled and smacked the other guy on the back and the two shared an interesting handshake.
"So what's the source of entertainment here?" A guy with black hair, long and tied into a small ponytail at the base of his neck asked Seifer. "After an eight hour drive and six energy drinks, I'm pumped!"
"Well, if you guys are up to it, I can show you. It's a place called Joe's. It's like a club without the alcohol and stripping." He replied, grinning from ear to ear.
"As long as the place has food, I'm up for it!" Another guy, shorter than the other two with blonde spiky hair with multicolored tips spoke. In a way, he kinda looked like Zell.
"Yep, there's food and music. It's actually a pretty cool place." Seifer wanted to drag them down there so he could introduce them to his friends. Some of them had been really curious.
"Sure, why not?" the black-haired guy said.
"Let's go," The guy who drove agreed.
"Good. I was supposed to meet some friends there an hour ago, anyway." Seifer led them into the house, helping carry stuff. They just set it inside the door and then walked back out again.
"So in other words, we were going whether or not we wanted to?" The guy with the brown hair asked.
"Yep." Seifer grinned at him.
"You haven't changed, Seif!" he laughed, getting into Seifer's car. Seifer nodded and followed them into his own car.
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"Where is he? Doesn't he know that an hour means an hour?" Quistis looked a little mad. How on Earth was she supposed to charm him into falling in love with her if he wasn't here to charm?
"Relax, Quistis. He probably had some stuff to do. You know how guys are. They put everything to the last minute," Rinoa reassured her friend, sitting on a couch with her nose stuck in a book.
The gang was currently hanging out at a place called Joe's. Joe's was Balamb's teen hangout where just about everyone went to have fun after school. The ages ranged from 13 to 18. The place was set up like club with a bar and a stage. There was no alcohol anywhere within the building, but one could get food and a large variety of sodas. There was a jukebox and a dance floor, too. Throughout the whole the building there were tables, chairs, couches, a big screen TV with cable, a pool table, and a lot of other stuff, too. The far corner was where Rinoa, Selphie, Quistis, Irvine, Zell, and Seifer always hung out. It was set up like a lounge with several couches, a few tables, and some chairs arranged in an off square. Right now, the place was still pretty empty, but it was still early in the afternoon. Most of the teens came in at around 5:30 and 6:00.
"Yes, well, how am I supposed to work my magic on him if he isn't here?" Quistis demanded of her friend who was barely even paying attention to her now.
"What magic? Oh, you mean your black magic?" Irvine asked of her, laughing at his little joke. "Beware! She's a witch!" he succeeded in getting Zell laughing and making Quistis rather agitated.
"I was talking about my charm for your information!" she replied heatedly, "And who even asked for your opinion anyway?"
"Nobody did. I just thought that I would put my two cents in." He grinned at her, pushing her even closed to the edge.
"Well, next time, don't." It was apparent that Quistis didn't like Irvine very much.
Selphie, who usually at this time took up for Irvine, was still ignoring him. She just let Quistis be her nasty self to him and was secretly even cheering the blonde on. So far, he hadn't even noticed that Selphie was even mad at him, which started to crumble her perfect plan. If that didn't get to him, then what did? There had to be something! This whole thing was just making her mad!
Quistis continued to pace the area, watching the door and waiting for Seifer to walk through it. She'd never been so, for lack of a better word, paranoid in her entire life. When would it end? Well, that answer was easy: whenever Seifer decided to show up.
"Stop worrying, Quistis. He'll show up eventually. Sheesh. You're acting like a Mother Hen." Rinoa said from behind her book. She was watching Quistis out the corner of her eye, and it was somewhat amusing.
"I am not a Mother Hen. I just need him to be him to be here so I can charm him into falling madly in love with me!" she pretty much yelled, not caring that the few other individuals were giving her odd looks.
"Who are you charming into falling madly in love with you?" spoke a voice they all knew very well. Quistis quickly turned around and produced her best flirty, innocent smile that she could muster. Only, when she saw the scene before her, her entire jaw dropped completely along with Selphie's too.
Standing there with Seifer was three other guys that they had never seen before. All three of them were extremely hot, and Quistis could hardly believe it. She had hit the jackpot big time.
"Quistis, shut your mouth, you're not a codfish," Rinoa spoke again from her book. She was by no means affected by the guys with Seifer. Yet, anyway. She'd only briefly glanced at them.
Quistis, in response to Rinoa's command, quickly whirled around to give the girl an evil look before turning around to face Seifer and his companions with another winning smile.
"So, Seifer, who are these handsome gentlemen?" she asked so sweetly that one might have thought she was made of sugar. Yeah, right. Rinoa rolled her eyes.
"Wow. She's laying it on thick, isn't she?" The guy with the blond hair laughed, elbowing Seifer. The other two guys just nodded. The one with the brown hair was peering around Quistis to the girl who sat on the couch with the book. She looked familiar.
"Seifer! Dude! You said one friend! You didn't say anything about three!" Irvine lifted his cowboy hat, laughing.
"Seriously, man!" Zell agreed.
Seifer laughed at this and looked to his three pals with a big grin. "To tell you the truth, I didn't know either. I just thought that he was coming." He pointed to the guy with the brown hair, who stood with his arms over his chest, still staring at Rinoa.
"Well, are you going to stand there like an idiot or are you going to introduce us?" his friend with the long, black hair asked.
"Oh, right!" Seifer reared his head back and laughed. "Guys, this is Drag," he pointed to the guy who had just spoken. He then turned to the blond guy. "This is Zion. And this," he pointed to the brown-haired guy. "Is my best friend, Squall."
Rinoa looked up then. All the sounds around her immediately silenced themselves as she finally made eye contact with the guy who had been staring at her. She looked at him closely, thinking that she was hearing things. Were her eyes and ears both deceiving her? In one way, she hoped they were, but the larger, more rational part knew that she had heard everything correctly.
Oh no. Not you.
After what felt like an eternity of silence, Rinoa went back to her book. She could feel the heat on her cheeks and knew that they were probably as red as they could get. She knew that her best bet would be to play it cool and ignore everything, concentrating on nothing but the paperback book in her hands.
"And who are these lovely ladies?" The guy that Seifer called Drag asked, eyeing Quistis from top to bottom. She smiled at him, figuring that a little flirting wouldn't hurt too much.
Seifer went on to introduce the rest of the gang, pointing to each of them. "That's Quistis, Selphie, Irvine, Zell, and Rin-"
"Rinoa Caraway." Squall finished the name for him, crossing his arms over his muscular chest and smirking.
"I wanna take a wild guess that maybe you two know each other?" Seifer asked, looking from Rinoa on the couch to Squall standing beside him.
"We've met before. Briefly," Rinoa said rather tersely, keeping her eyes locked on the words printed on the page. Her mind was screaming, "Don't look at him! Don't look at him!" Unfortunately, it was becoming increasingly difficult not to do so. "And it's Heartilly."
"Have you now?" Quistis wondered aloud, "And I've never heard about this little rendezvous before? For shame!" She placed her hands on her hips in mock anger.
"It was a long time ago, okay? I-I barely even remember him!" Rinoa threw back in her own defense. Quistis raised an eyebrow in question of her friend. Rinoa's cheeks now burned almost painfully. She jumped up suddenly and grabbed her jacket quickly. "It doesn't matter anyway. I'll talk to you guys later. I've got a lot of homework that I don't want to save for the last minute." Rinoa headed for the door, walking as far away from this new guy as possible.
They all watched her leave, confused and even a little amused. She was undoubtedly hiding something.
"Um, guys?" Selphie finally broke the silence that had followed Rinoa's hasty exit. They all looked at her. "None of our teachers gave us any written work. All we have to do this weekend is study. Today was an off day." Selphie bit her lower lip nervously.
"Oh, she's hiding something!" Quistis laughed mischievously. And they all knew that meant that she was determined to know each and every dirty little secret.
"Hey, uh, Squall?" Irvine called to the guy. He nodded at him. "What do you know about this? You guys have met before, right?"
Squall sighed and ran his hand through his long, brown hair. He looked back at the door, then to the group that was eagerly awaiting his answer. "You know, I have no idea. I can't remember back that far." He smiled at their disappointment.
Ah, gotta love the little white lie. JA/N: Well, there it is: my "new" story. I was a little hesitant to post this one, but one of my friends talked me into it. Before I do anything else, I'll tell you guys a little bit about it. As you may have noticed (or if said before, can't remember) this is a high-school based fanfic. I've always wanted to do one but was afraid of how you all would react. I really hope you like it. Some things are a little different. I had to change a few things but I will try my best to stay real close to the original character profiles made up by Final Fantasy. I just wanted to do something different. As part of the changes, I put the main characters in different situations with a little bit more history to them (but not quite as in depth as with my Time Trilogy) and I changed two little tiny things that just felt right. I brought Raine and Julia into this. I just really wanted them alive. And I also added "something" to the Leonhart/Loire family. All the characters (main) are in high school. They are seniors, some with a severe case of senioritis. I based several characters on my friends at school. Like Quistis, for instance. I gave her some of the characteristics of my best friend, Megan. Some of you remember Meg, right? She was my crazy editor for Time Goes On. I think she's doing the rest of the trilogy, not sure. Anyway, I made a few adjustments there. I also put some of my friends into Drag and Zion. They are my original masterpieces at the moment, and that's not counting the characters from TGO. He, he, he! Well, I'm going to shut up now, and get working on the next chapter. R&R! I'm dying to know what you all think!
And yes, for you Last Reality fans, THIS is what I've been doing when I was supposed to be working on TLR. Sorry! It'll be done soon! I'm just having technical difficulties. Okay, never mind, I'm just being lazy! J
E/N: Uhh... What's with the "J" at the end of the story and your A/N, Katelyn? Was I supposed to edit it out, or is it your new "catch phrase" since Seifer is using "Later days?" JJJJJJJJJ... Oh yeah, I'm back, fellas!
And when I read "anything that has boobs and a pretty face," guess which darling buddy of ours I thought of? 'Tis true, he even hits on you! Mwahaha!
Quistis is a whore. Whore, whore, whore! I will not be Quisty! -denounces the title of Quistis- And for the record, Quistis is EXACTLY like Irvine on Estrogen. I do NOT flirt with anything with a penis and a sexy smile! asdfadghcxjasdfasdf!!!