Title: If I Could Turn Back Time
Author: yeknodelttil
Series: Doctor Who
Rating: K+
Genre: Romance/Angst
Spoilers: The Girl in the Fireplace, School Reunion
Characters: Doctor (tenth), Rose,
Disclaimer: Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't own them, So pretty please don't sue!
Author's Note: An episode tag of some form or another.
Summary: Everyone cries. Rose/10 He wept. The dam broke and he wept. The Doctor slid down the consol the letter still in his hand; salty tears fell around him. He hadn't wept since…well Galifrey. The words 'my love' were the worst, he didn't deserve her love, he didn't deserve any love; the galaxy had taught him that long ago. Never in his life had he expected it to happen again, to lose someone else.So lately been wondering
Who will be there to take my place?
When I'm gone, you'll need love
To light the shadows on you faceIf a great wave shall fall,
And fall upon us all
In between the sand and stone
Could you make it on your own?
He was attracted to Madam de la Pompadour; he didn't love her like…a choked sob came out. He threw the letter away from him and curled up into a ball.
He'd known her for a day, she'd known him her whole life, and he'd left someone again. He promised to show her something wonderful and arrived a few days too late.
If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go
And maybe I'll find out
A way to make it back someday
To watch you, to guide you
Through the darkest of your days"Doctor?" A call came ringing throughout the control room. He knew the person who it belonged to had found the letter when he heard a gasp making him sob more. Metallic footsteps sounded round the room growing louder and louder until they were upon him. "Oh Doctor, come here…" He found himself being pulled into the arms of Rose Tyler. Hot tears ran onto her blue t-shirt. "Let it out." She whispered in his ear, rocking and stroking his chocolate coloured hair. "Let it all out."
If a great wave shall fall,
And fall upon us all
Well then I hope there's someone out there
Who can bring me back to you!
"I don't age, they said that. You wither and you decay and you die." She heard him sob.
"I'm sorry."
"You all leave me – alone – to carry on."
"Is this what this is about?" She pulled back a little to see his face. "You think we leave you on purpose? We don't, these things happen." She told him, his eyes glistened with more tears.
"43 she was just 43 when…"
"Did you love her?" She asked him very delicately. He shook his head at her. "But she loved you?" He nodded before once again burying his face in her shoulder. "Is this about me? About me dying?" She took his silence for confirmation. She held him tightly, "Don't worry if it happens I'll just have to haunt you." She joked slightly. "What is this all over?" She wanted to know where the whole living alone came from. "Where did it come from?" He spoke so low that she barely heard him.
If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go
"Galifrey." He pulled his head back she saw his red eyes properly. "I learned long ago I'm not worth it."
"Worth what?"
"Love." He sighed shakily, "Long ago I lost my family, not that I really had one." He paused for a minute. "I was rejected for my opinions and behaviour. Then I lost my wife," Rose felt a stab of pain in her heart, she never knew and it hurt her, "My children," The stab was more agonizing this time, she also felt it for him. It was bad enough to lose a wife, but children? It was unthinkable the pain he was in. She understood why he always kept the barriers up. "And my planet." He looked at her and cupped her cheek. "You have a home to go back to and a family who love you. I can't have that then lose it again. I won't let it happen."
Run away with my love
Run away with my hope
Runaway with my heart
I know now, just quite how
My life and love might still go on
In you heart, in you mind
I'll stay with you for all of time
"Fate is out of our hands." She told him gently. "We can't control who we fall in love with and whether it'll be Romeo and Juliet or Happily Ever After. But we can enjoy the time we have together." She looked deeply into his deep brown eyes. "We could restart." She changed from generalising to talking about them. "Have a family, if you want one, someone will always be there no matter what. I'll die, yes, but I will always be with you. In here," She touched hit forehead, "And in here." She laid her hand over his hearts.
"I love you," He spoke feeling free for the first time in a long time,
"You already know that I love you." Rose pressed a kiss to his forehead. "Its time to stop living in the past and look on towards the future. Together." He stood and held out his hand. She grabbed it and pulled herself up.
"You've become wise Rose Tyler."
"I've had an excellent teacher." He reached for her hand
If I could, then I would
I'll go wherever you will go
Way up high or down low
I'll go wherever you will go
If I could turn back time
I'll go wherever you will go
If I could make you mine
I'll go wherever you will go
I'll go wherever you will go
The EndA/N Wherever You Will Go by the Calling is my favourite song of all time and I just thought it'd be perfect for this fic. I hope you feel the same.
Luv
Liz xxx