Come out, moon
Come out, wishing star
Come out, come out
Wherever you are
Sharpay never thought this day would come. She hadn't expected it at all, it just came so sudden. She hadn't expected it until maybe she was old and gray. This was saying something because you wouldn't find Sharpay Evans considering herself "old and gray" ever. She loved to be called things like cute, peppy, and styling—never alone, sad, heartbroken, and devastated as she was now.
Silent tears were falling down her rather pale cheeks this misty Monday morning. Clad in a black dress and sweater, compared to her lifeless ghastly-white skin, the red stains around her eyes and running down the sides of her face were more noticeable than ever. She was shaking…she was hurting. Most of all, she felt hopeless and alone.
People in the car were trying their best to comfort the grieving teenager, but failing equally. Like everybody thought, the Evans family was oh so very stubborn. It took more than whispers of "Shh…everything will be okay…", "I'm so sorry, Shar…", "He will always be in your heart…", and constant hugs and embraces to soothe Sharpay at this specific time.
I'm out here in the dark
All alone and wide awake
Come and find me
In her hands, she held a heart shaped locket with the letter S engraved in a curly script. Her brother had given it to her for her sixteenth birthday, her sweet sixteen. She couldn't bear it anymore. Inside the locket were two special pictures. The picture on the left was of her, smiling for the camera, for her brother, the one who took the photo. The picture on the right was of Ryan. He just looked so happy, and it broke her already broken heart even more to look at, or even think about the brother she loved so dearly. Her twin brother, her big brother, her guardian.
Sharpay had done so much crying lately, and the fact that the car had just pulled into the parking lot of the church didn't help.
"Ryan…I need you now…come find me," Sharpay mumbled under her breath as she was helped into the sacred place where the funeral ceremony was to be held. She was led to the front pew that was marked reserved, next to her grandmothers and grandfather. Her father was in prison, and her mother was already dead. Just thinking about it all made her cry even harder. She was alone now, what was she going to do?
I'm empty and I'm cold
And my heart's about to break
Come and find me
The funeral ceremony was only a blur to her. Then it was time for her to speak. Sharpay sniffled and tried to wipe her eyes. She clutched the paper of which held the words she was going to speak of, and shakily made her way up to the podium. She drew in a trembling breath and tears stung at her sore eyes when she saw the congregation, all looking so sad, most were sobbing quietly to each other. Others looked like they had just witnessed an axe murder.
Reluctantly, she began quietly, speaking slowly into the microphone, her voice cracking as she went along.
"I'm here t-to speak of my twin brother, Ryan. You don't know how much I wish I had changed all the times I had ever criticized him for petty things such as dance routines or singing. I knew he was trying his b-best, because he loved me and wanted to make me happy…I shouldn't have been so selfish! All I cared about was myself!" She paused, slowing down. She was getting off subject and was beginning to sound hysterical. Sharpay began again. "Ryan was always a positive person, seeing the glass as half full, not half empty. He lived each day as if it was his last. I wanted to thank him for always protecting me, and never leaving my side, especially when my mother…d-died.
"He promised that he would never leave me, but I know this wasn't intentional. I remember a few years back when I was five and I scraped my knee on the sidewalk and he never left my side, all the time I was whimpering and crying because it hurt so badly…" This earned a few chuckles from the congregation, but everything went deadly silent after that.
I need you to come here and find me
'Cause without you I'm totally lost
Sharpay stopped, thinking about what she was going to say next. "I j-just wish I could see him again, even if it was only for a moment." She hiccoughed. "I'd…I'd do anything if I could just tell him…that I loved him with all my heart, and…" she whimpered and stifled a sob, "that I was sorry for being such a jerk most of my life." Finally she broke out into sobs and she stuttered the words she needed to say in conclusion.
She looked up into the painting of heaven streaked across the ceiling. "R-ryan, I j-just want you t-to know that I'm nothing without you…and I d-don't know what I'm gonna do without you guiding me!" She swallowed another walloping sob rising in her throat. "I promise you that I'll b-be the best little sis from n-now on, okay?" Two more tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'll do it j-just for you."
Sharpay glanced back at the people watching her. They seemed to be crying harder. That made her cry harder also, but she knew that she had to finish her speech. She had to be strong for Ryan.
I've hung a wish on every star
It hasn't done much good so far
I can only dream of you
Wherever you are
"Alright…well, I've wished and wished that somehow this wasn't real, b-but it is, and I have to—" she gulped for air. "I have t-to face this on my own. Ryan was the greatest brother that anybody could ever imagine, and now he can reign above us all in heaven. He'll be my shining star...now and forever." Her knees went weak and she gripped the podium for balance. "Th-thank you." She began to walk off of the altar.
I'll hear you laugh
I'll see you smile
I'll be with you
Just for a while
As Sharpay tried to leave the stage area, she found that she couldn't.
"Oh God, Ryan!" she said to herself, and with that, she collapsed in a heap right there on the floor. The strong feeling of realization hit Sharpay like a tidal wave. The fact that she was alone sunk into her head and she sobbed openly, not able to stop. There she sat, hysterical, legs tucked under her, face in her hands, grieving for the loss of the thing that she could never, ever get back. "Why?" was all that she could wail.
She longed to see his smiling face. She longed to hear his laughter at her jokes and her sarcasm, and at her, teasingly, when she got upset about little things. She longed to be with him, even if it would cost her everything she owned! She cried and cried and cried. Who knows how long she was sitting there?
Soon, somebody was helping her up. Whoever it was, she didn't care. She wanted her twin. She wanted to feel loved by him again. There were countless things that she wanted… Sharpay cried herself through and passed out.
But when the morning comes
And the sun begins to rise
I will lose you
Because it's just a dream
When I open up my eyes
I will lose you
"Sharpay…"
Somebody was calling out to her. She knew that voice…it was Ryan. They were standing in a golden, endless field, just together. Nobody else was around.
"Ryan?" Sharpay reached out to him, and he pulled her into a hug.
"I'm here, Shar," he whispered into her ear. She leaned into his embrace for a moment longer, and pulled away slowly, trying to keep that moment stuck in her head. She then reached towards his hand and he took it.
Sharpay glanced into his eyes, those morning stars, then at his smile. She smiled back. "Ry, I thought you were…I thought that you—"
"Shh…I am, Sharpay." Tears filled her eyes. "But I can still reach you in your dreams, you remember that…always."
"But, Ryan. I can't live without you…" Ryan placed a hand over her mouth gently.
"Yes you can, Shar. I may not be on earth, but I'm in a better place. I'm deep inside here…" He took her hands in his and placed them over her heart. "And here…" He kissed the top of her head. "Don't worry about life. You'll find a new place, and I know you can be greater than ever. You have Troy, Shar. He loves you. I love you too." He wiped her tears away.
"I-I…I love you more," she whispered. "But—"
"No buts, please, Sharpay. Be strong for me. Can you do that, Shar? I know that you can. I know that you are determined and very, very courageous."
Sharpay took a deep breath. "Yes, I can do that for you."
Then there was a faint ringing sound. They were bells, ringing out a delicate, angelic song. It must have been heaven. Ryan's whole body glowed a light white.
"I have to go now, Sharpay. Don't forget to be strong for me!" He was floating away from her slowly. She just stared, no words were able to come out of her mouth just yet. "I love you and I always will, baby sister…Be…strong…" His voice faded away and so did his body. Sharpay was alone again.
"NO, RYAN!" she called out into the dimming light. "DON'T LEAVE ME! NO…NO, PLEASE…"
Sharpay bolted upright in her bed, face wet with fresh tears. "Ryan…"
I used to believe in forever
But forever's too good to be true
Every step on the stairway of life was a struggle for Sharpay. But that one dream that she had seemed to stamp a message into her brain. She couldn't give up now. She had to live for herself, as well as her brother. Ryan believed in her. That was all that she needed to know in order for her to get up each day.
Every night, she lies in bed, reminiscing about all the times that she shared with her twin. She can fall asleep peacefully, because she knows that he is with her every step of the path of life.
And every night, she looks at the picture of him on her bedroom wall, right above her bed. His invincible smile keeps her safe.
I've hung a wish on every star
It hasn't done much good so far
I don't know what else to do
Except to try to dream of you
And wonder if you're dreaming too
Wherever you are
Wherever you are
"I love you, big brother."
THE END! Read and review, my good people.