Title: Complex and Simple

Author: Waldo.

Pairing: Sheppard/Beckett)

Words: 465

Rating: PG

Summary: Complex eyes, simple words.

John was willing himself to lay still. His instincts to fight and run and return to the nest were becoming overwhelming. He'd woken to find that they'd brought him home and that he was in hard leather restraints, chained to the infirmary bed. The irrational parts of his brain rebelled and kicked and screeched and fought uselessly against his bonds until he exhausted himself and passed out.

When the very first inkling of sanity creept in, it told him that if that was what his instincts told him to do, it was best that he remained restrained.

"Ah, waking up, are we?"

John looked up at him, trying to focus. As much as he'd mutated, his brain still couldn't comprehend what his now-complex eyes were now showing him. He squinted, trying to make the thirty-two Carson's in front of him coalesce into one man. It didn't work. He let his head fall back onto the pillow. He closed his eyes, trying to force the headache to abate. Trying to still his instincts.

He could hear Carson sigh and then the beeping of the monitors over his head as Carson made some adjustments.

He felt the edge of the bed dip as Carson sat on the edge of the mattress. "Good morning, John. I'm glad you're waking up, it's been a few days since you've been terribly lucid. Can you tell me how you're feeling?"

John just shook his head. Not really sure if he meant that he couldn't speak or that he wouldn't.

Carson put a hand on his shoulder. "John, I need to get a few photos. We have to document your improvement. It's been a little less than a week and already the scaling has reduced by eleven percent, but we need to keep track, make sure the changes don't go faster than your body can handle and to be sure that you do make a complete recovery."

The idea of a permanent record of him looking like this, of having lost control, terrified and angered him. He pulled away as far as his restraints would allow and tried to shift onto his side. To turn his back to Carson and his camera.

When he couldn't hide well enough he struggled and screamed, pulling so hard on the wrist cuffs that Carson held his hands down, immobilizing him further. Infuriating him further.

He never heard Carson call for the sedative and only barely felt it break through the scaly skin on his arm. As he faded out he could hear Carson explain to someone, "He doesn't want anyone to see him like this." And just as he drifted off he heard Carson whisper, "If not one other cell were to repair itself, John…I would still see the man I love."

John stopped struggling