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Cracks in the Sidewalk
part viii
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The first rehearsal was a complete and utter failure--a failure that was accompanied by a theme song of Sasuke playing Radiohead while Gaara played the Sex Pistols. The neighbors pitched in too by banging bitter knocks of their fists on the front door. A more intellectual individual would have called the ruckus Dada; Naruto simply called it horseshit.
"You guys can't both play at once," said Naruto over the noise.
"What, you expect me to play that softy bullshit your friend Sauce-gay plays?" said Gaara with a malevolent snap of teeth. He glowered at Naruto for interrupting.
"As if punk rock has any substance to it," said Sasuke. "And it's Sasuke, douche bag."
It was rare for Naruto to find himself in the company of peers less mature than himself. The whole experience of Sasuke, Gaara, and himself in the same living room together was bending his brain in ways it shouldn't.
"Punk rock is a man's music," said Gaara.
"You mean a pubescent, whining man's music," said Sasuke.
"God, just shut the fuck up, both of you!" said Naruto.
"You shut the fuck up," said Gaara. Gaara slipped the bass over his head and set the instrument down. The thing was a solid black boulder of an instrument that resembled a blunt object a Mafioso would use on an antagonist named 'Vinny.' Gaara glared at both Naruto and Sasuke through eyeliner eyes. He crossed his arms across his chest. "I'm sick of this bullshit. I'm leaving."
"Good riddance," said Sasuke.
"What?" said Naruto, mortified. "Wait! It's only our first time meeting each other; of course it's not going to be perfect."
"It's never going to be perfect," said Gaara as he packed his instrument in its case.
"Okay, so Sasuke is an asshole sometimes--or all the time--but that doesn't mean he can't have his moments--just wait 'till you hear him play," said Naruto
"I have, he sucks," said Gaara.
Naruto ignored Gaara and continued. "Plus, you'll bring amazing energy to the band!"
"The amazing energy is you and we call it cocaine," said Sasuke.
"The man has a point," said Gaara, picking up his case. "Have a nice life."
"Okay, see? You guys can be unified through hatred of me," said Naruto. He trembled a little in desperation. "It's helped this town before, it can help us out right?" Naruto laughed a nervous laugh that was wholly unconvincing of his sarcasm. "There's really nothing hating me won't solve!"
The effect of sympathy on his companions was a decided zero.
Gaara rolled his eyes and Sasuke muttered something about melodrama. Naruto should have known. They were both assholes. Naruto had only one option left:
Groveling.
Naruto threw himself to Gaara's feet and latched himself to Gaara's ankles like a giant squid.
"Please, please, please stay," said Naruto, his voice close to wailing. More neighbors pounded on the door.
"Let the bastard go," said Sasuke as he put down his own instrument. "It's not like he could play half a shit anyway."
"What did you just say?" said Gaara. He whipped around and stared long and hard at Sasuke, challenging him to say the words again.
"I said you couldn't play a shit if your life depended on it," said Sasuke.
Gaara shook Naruto off of his shins and threw himself at Sasuke. Naruto watched as the living room quickly disintegrated into a mess of punches, kicks, grappling, and pulled hairs. Naruto got the eerie feeling he was in an animal house and he was just another paying spectator. It was actually quite amusing; Naruto wished he had brought popcorn.
Sasuke had his head wedged in Gaara's armpit when he said, "Well then prove you can play, you fucking cunt."
"Oh, I'll play," said Gaara as Sasuke's fist collided with his jaw. "I'll show you how it's fucking done."
Naruto was apparently wrong about the unifying powers of hate, in reality what really drove interpersonal relations was violence--lots and lots and violence.
The two boys sprang apart like repelling magnets and grabbed their instruments. Sasuke donned his guitar while Gaara unclasped the case and pulled out his inner-city weapon. Naruto was amazed at what testosterone could do to some people. He swallowed slowly and clapped his hands with nervous optimism.
"So," Naruto said, "what are we going to play?"
"Name it," said Sasuke, his words sharp and poisonous.
"Um," said Naruto, uncomfortable. "The Clash?"
"What song?" spat Gaara, impatient.
"London Calling?" said Naruto, worried for his personal safety.
The two started playing as if they were merely two parts of a whole, the opening strums of the song falling in perfect time with each other. Gaara played with a vigor that could only be described as crazed vengeance, while Sasuke played with something akin to blistering determination. Naruto felt the electricity zip across the room and soon he became invigorated and energetic as well. His body rushed into animation like a puppet propelled by some invisible hand. He bobbed on the balls of his feet and swung his head back and forth to the metronome of guitar and bass.
Naruto waited with bottled anticipation for Gaara's deviation from the strum; he went wild when he heard Gaara play the prelude for the vocals.
Now that war is declared--and battle come down
London calling to the underworld
Come out of the cupboard, all you boys and girls
Naruto sang to Gaara and Sasuke with an exaggerated Johnny Rotten drawl that filled his mouth and slipped through the cracks of their rivalry. Gaara's lips curled in devious excitement as Naruto showed his true colors--the same colors that painted the school a demonic red. Naruto pushed himself against Gaara so his face was craned close enough for Gaara to make out the white of his eyes.
All that phony Beatlemania has bitten the dust
London calling, see we ain't got no swing
'Cept for the ring of that truncheon thing
Gaara howled when Naruto mentioned 'Beatlemania.' He slid Sasuke a defiant glare and played his notes with more vigor. Gaara swung as he played his ominous tune. His notes echoed through the living room like a herald for anarchy. Gaara mouthed the words to the song in apparent ecstasy.
Engines stop running and the wheat is growing thin
A nuclear error, but I have no fear
London is drowning-and I live by the river
Naruto then moved to Sasuke and let out a series of hell-hound yells expected of future stanzas, but he just couldn't be bothered to hold the eerie cries back. This brought a smile to Sasuke's face--a rare sliver of a thing. Naruto started banging his head back and forth and he encouraged Sasuke to do the same. He yowled in delight when Sasuke complied.
But when we were talking-I saw you nodding out
London calling, see we ain't got no highs
Except for that one with the yellowy eyes
Sasuke roared into his guitar solo with blazing fingers. Naruto saw Gaara nodding in appreciation of Sasuke's passion and smiled. It was going to be okay after all. Naruto noticed Sasuke filled out the exhibition with a flourish of skills. Naruto let out a trail of animalistic howls. Gaara joined in his wails with crude lavish.
London calling, yeah, I was there, too
An' you know what they said? Well, some of it was true!
London calling at the top of the dial
After all this, won't you give me a smile?
They were all sharing the same love then, like some strange breaking of bread in which they all gained some piece of ancient immortality. They all drank the same liquor. They weren't acting themselves anymore. Music took over every vibration, every inflection of their being. Naruto threw his bead back and laughed as the song ended.
I never felt so much a'like
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"That was great!" said Naruto with a swing of his arms. They were sitting around the coffee table drinking much-needed water. Sweat was pouring down their shirts, making stains in the fabrics--but none of them minded much. They were all still high on the moment of empathy that had transcended their limbs and animated their souls. It had been exhilarating.
"It wasn't too shoddy," said Gaara.
"Shoddy?" said Naruto, his eyes large as saucers. "It was wonderful! I feel great!"
"We don't have a drummer," said Sasuke. He took a sip of his water. "It's problematic regardless of what kind of music you're playing."
Gaara nodded in silent agreement.
"Well," said Naruto, leaning back to think. "I think I know someone." He reached for the phone in flubbery glee. Sasuke rolled his eyes.
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Shikamaru had the horrible experience of waking up before two o'clock in the afternoon on a Saturday. His mother was banging on the door in her usual fascist way, screaming about something ringing. Shikamaru reached for the alarm clock first. But no, it was Saturday. He looked at the clock instead. It was one o'clock in the afternoon.
Shikamaru grumbled as he pulled himself from his blankets. He looked around and noted the sun had just reached a little past overhead and his blinds were casting slanted shadows over his desk. Indeed, it was probably one o'clock in the afternoon; on a Saturday.
He tumbled out of his bed in agitated clumsiness, stepping on a mess of chess pieces that had fallen from his lap the night before. He groaned as he picked the soldiers from his sole. He sat on his bed for a couple of seconds, shaking his head to rouse the sleep from his head. His mother was still banging on the door.
Shikamaru finally got up and opened the door. A phone was immediately shoved into his face. He mumbled his thanks as he took the offending object and closed his door.
He placed the receiver to his ear.
"Hello?" he said. "What do you want?"
He heard someone familiar, but not familiar enough for him to like, on the other end.
"It's one in the fucking afternoon."
The voice on the other end mimicked the same words that had just left his mouth in an accusatory manner. Shikamaru glared at his clock. It was still too early for this.
He listened to the stream of blubbery excitement that spewed from the other end with tested patience, his eyes drooping a little more every second the other boy rambled on. It was a Saturday.
Shikamaru was usually quite brilliant at grasping concepts the first time he was told, but it was only have the fourth repetition of the day and time that snapped him to the attention. A travesty was being committed.
Shikamaru cut the other boy off mid-sentence.
"No. Shut up. Go away. Bye."
Shikamaru shut the phone off and proceeded to fall back into bed. However, his head had only been on the mattress for a couple of seconds before the phone screamed its shrill protest again. He was determined to ignore it.
Until his mother started banging on the door again.
"I've got it," said Shikamaru with a malicious snap of his teeth.
He picked the phone up again and said with blurred haste, "Fine. God you're a pain in the ass. I'll be there tomorrow--five o'clock. Just leave me the fuck alone."
Shikamaru pressed the off button with relish before evaporating into the depths of unconsciousness again.