-16. Trolla-páttr
Heap on more wood! - the wind is chill;
But let it whistle as it will,
We'll keep our Christmas merry still.
- Marmion
With a wave of Deputy Headmistress McGonagall's hand, a light Christmas breakfast was served. Thanks to the Triwizard Tournament, and the fact the storm had now turned to heavy snow and ice, the Great Hall was almost filled. It hadn't hosted this many diners on a Christmas morning since the travel restrictions of World War II.
The three Gryffindors might be excused if they didn't feel like being near food for a few days, but that wasn't the case; they were wolfing down full portions, and of course Ron was leading the pack. Between mouthfuls, he raised a few questions on the previous day's events.
"So explain to me, Hermione. How could you possibly know where we were?" asked Ron, adorned in Harry's newly-knitted dragon jumper. "Even Dumbledore didn't know."
"Hedwig knew," answered Hermione, sporting a red Christmas bow in her hair. "When she got back to Hogwarts with Harry's message, she couldn't find you. So, she came to me. Girls stick together like that, y'know."
"And what did Hedwig do, write it on a mirror with lipstick?"
"I wish she had; it would have saved a lot of trouble, just to find out where you were. First, I had to 'borrow' Angelina's broom. Then Hedwig and I went to Dumbledore's office — we flew in his astronomy window, to avoid Filch — and roused the Sorting Hat in the middle of the night. It interpreted bird-talk for me, and Hedwig told us where you were — but not why. In the course of it, the hat sounded like it knew something more, and I quizzed it... and it told me all about your little sojourn that he sparked by mentioning the boot."
Harry was shocked. "The hat blabbed? I swore it to secrecy!"
"Fortunately, you extracted a promise instead of using a charm. In the end, yes, it blabbed — thank God! I just had to coerce it a bit. Good thing I did, or I might have ended up like you two, sitting there in my birthday suit, waiting to be eaten."
Ron looked up towards the ceiling. "Hermione Granger, trussed up, in her birthday suit. Let me just treasure that mental image for a minute — it's only fair... OW! I was just joking, Hermione!"
Harry, fiddling with his almost-timely gift from Sirius — a pocket knife to cut any knot — looked up, puzzled. "You 'coerced' the hat? How do you coerce a hat?"
She smiled. "Fear me, Harry; I can be very devious if I can just keep my head in a pinch. I needed a way to convince the hat. At first I thought of sharp objects. I was looking on Dumbledore's desk, and my pockets, for scissors or a knife. Then, I found I still had a Hogsmeade purchase in my slicker from the shopping trip. Oh, it was perfect for the job! Remember our run-in with Salazar Slytherin — how the hat ended up drunk as a skunk from the tanner's leather polish?"
"Hermione! Tell me you didn't get the hat sozzled!"
"I would have. But I guessed it would never want that morning-after sensation again, ever! So, I dangled your harmless little bottle of liquid boot polish in front of it, and threatened to apply a few generous, intoxicating coats — and the hat sang like a canary."
-o-
The whole school found out about Horgund's murderous troll when the Daily Prophet arrived with the post. Of course, the trio knew the story in much more detail than the goblins had given the reporters, but kept it to themselves.
Well, almost. Girls confide.
In mid-morning, Hermione and Ginny were sitting in a corner of the common room, whispering to each other, giggling and chuckling. When they spotted Ron and Harry, it only got worse; the girls went into loud, uncontrollable rolling-on-the-floor laughter, gasping for breath, pounding on the cushions and pointing at the two boys.
Ron shook his head, unsmiling. "I tell you, Harry, we should have blanked her memory when we had the chance."
-o-
Owls' tales are an everyday entertainment in the owlery. Hedwig, of course, related her latest tale to all the perked-up ears. They sympathized with her dangerous trip through the storm, and noted how cleverly she had communicated with Hermione. She conveniently omitted her moment of airsickness; what self-respecting owl would confess such a thing?
The highlight of her story was a timely visit from two Hordgrund ravens, who had braved the snowstorm to deliver her a Christmas package from the goblins in thanks. When the straw wrapping was torn open, it proved to be a generous snack for the owls. Appropriately, it was a large packet of delicious seed from the wild flowering plant of Scotland known as Hogwort.
-o-
"That's quite a topper to cap your adventure, Potter!" said the Sorting Hat.
Harry had been summarising it all to Dumbledore in his office — and trying to explain why one of the Headmaster's books and a very nice compass were still lying in a pit in a cave near Hordgrund. He paused, and looked up to the Sorting Hat on its high shelf and smiled.
"I walked into another trap, just as you've been warning me. But, we solved it, with your help, and I'm back again, still in one piece. By the way, Hermione Granger apologises for troubling you in the middle of the night."
"Miss Granger and Hedwig were quite insistant on finding you, and it seemed dire enough to break my oath of silence, to help save you lot."
"Thanks for doing so, and believe it or not, the same from Ron. We would have been troll crumpets otherwise. You also saved a lot more goblins from death. I know you broke your promise with good reason, and dignity... and polish."
"Ahem. Well, yes... polish. Polish did play a significant part in it."
Dumbledore rose from the desk. "We'll all be too busy later today to talk properly, what with the ball. However, I am entitled to dine at the Gryffindor table, so if I might join you, perhaps you three can finish your tale over the midday banquet. I hear that it will begin with a delicious bowl of mugga, which you must sample."
Harry nodded, rose, and glanced once more at the high shelf.
"Happy Christmas, sir hat."
"Happy Christmas indeed, Mr. Potter..
Wizards and witches
Of prestidigious riches,
Willing and worthy,
Watchful and sturdy.
Hogwarts forever,
Forevermoooore!"