A/N: Making fun of myself, lol…
Disclaimer: don't own anything
Warning: yaoi
Tyka in a nutshell
Kai: (leaning against a wall, arms crossed, scowling)
Tyson: Hi Kai!
Kai: Go away! Can't you see I'm angsting?
Tyson: (pouts) Aw come on you big sourpuss, can't you ever lighten up?
Kai: Of course not, I had a horrible childhood. ANGST ANGST ANGST!
Tyson: But I can make you forget about it with the power of my love.
Kai: I hate you, go away! There has to be several chapters before I warm up to you and realise my true feelings for you! Now beat it, it's too early at this point of the story!
Tyson: (pouts) Aaw, ok, I'll leave you now to secretly feel guilty for hurting my feelings and hate yourself even more. Bye!
Kai: (feeling secretly guilty) Hnh.
Max: Tyson!
Tyson: Maxie!
Max: (glomps and huggles Tyson) You know, this would be really gay if I wasn't in love with Hillary.
Tyson: It sure would.
Rei: (appears out of nowhere)
Tyson: Hi Rei!
Rei: Hello Tyson. I can see from the look on your face that you're secretly in love with someone. Now who could it be? Of course, it's Kai!
Max: That was fast.
Rei: I have ancient Chinese wisdom; I know this stuff. Tyson, I'm qualified to give you love advice although I myself am dead inside because I'm pretending not to love Mariah. NO! I DON'T LOVE HER! SHE'S LIKE A SISTER TO ME! ANGST ANGST ANGST!
Hillary: (appears out of nowhere) Hi guys, what's up? Never mind the micro shorts and bikini top I'm wearing over my sexy, busty body. I know you're all immune to my hotness although I'm a babe and you're all teenagers with raging hormones.
Rei: I was about to give Tyson love advice though I have no experience whatsoever.
Hillary: But of course, you're from a Chinese village.
Rei: Exactly. Tyson, you must tell Kai how you feel.
Tyson: Is it really that simple?
Rei: Yes. That way you give him a chance to harshly reject you and go off to ponder his true feelings for you, so he can come back later and you two accidentally end up in a dark closet and he kisses you and confesses his love for you.
Tala: (appears out of nowhere) What are you talking about?
Max: Tyson's love life.
Tala: (smirks) O RLY? Get it? I'm being sarcastic to hide the fact I had a horrible childhood. ANGST!
Kai: (appears out of… well, nearby) Valkov!
Tala: Hiwatari!
(dramatic silence)
Kai: What are you doing here, Valkov?
Tala: I thought I'd drop by on this continent to bump into your teammates and get mixed up in their love lives because I have nothing better to do in Russia.
Kai: Hnh.
Bryan: (appears out of nowhere) Hi guys.
Tala: Bryan pretty! (starts making out with Bryan)
(A/N: Because Tala and Bryan are a side pairing, their feelings and anxieties are much less complicated and the dilemma solved much quicker so we can focus on the main pairing again.)
Kai: Seeing two guys make out is making me want to make out with Tyson. NO! I DON'T LOVE HIM! I HATE HIM! ANGST!
Tyson: Kai, can we go somewhere to talk?
Kai: Normally I'd say no, but my resistance crumbles when I look into your eyes as deep blue as the Nordic sky in the heart of the night, your eyes are like two clear, cool ponds that can swiftly change into a wild, blowing hurricane of passion, when I stare into your eyes I get lost into them…
Tyson: Um, is that a yes or a no?
Kai: (blushing) Krhm, yes. (walks away with Tyson)
Max: So, Hillary, since we're left over, how about we hook up?
Hillary: OK! Let's go hold hands in the park because making out is not an option with an asexual little boy like you.
Max: Fine with me!
Rei: All my friends coupling up around me is making me realise I love Mariah and have to go back home and marry her.
Kenny: (appears out of nowhere) I'm here to make sure Tyson and Kai are publicly humiliated, because how else could this story end?
Tyson and Kai: (away from the others)
Kai: So? What is it you want to tell me?
Tyson: (blushing) I hope you don't mind me stuttering like a retard, because that's how I get when I have to tell you I love you; Um, well, I, uh, see, erhm, ah, umm, heh, ahem, well, you see, uh…
Kai: I get the point.
Tyson: I love you!
Kai: That's impossible. Nobody can love me; I have a heart of ice.
Tyson: Not true! Let's argue about this heatedly so we can suddenly sink into a passionate kiss!
Tyson and Kai: (argue heatedly and suddenly sink into a passionate kiss)
Kai: No, I can't. I just can't. ANGST!
Tyson: Please Kai? You can be seme.
Kai: Ok! (makes out with Tyson and they fall on the floor)
(elsewhere)
Kenny: (runs away)
Rei: Where are you going?
Kenny: I have to get something from where Tyson and Kai just headed.
Rei: What are you getting?
Kenny: Just this thing.
Rei: What thing?
Kenny: SHUT UP ALREADY! (enters the room where Tyson and Kai are making out)
Tyson: OMG!
Kai: WTF?
Kenny: What, you two are gay? How is that possible, with you two never paying attention to any females and always bickering with each other like an old married couple and Kai wearing really feminine clothing and Tyson having long hair and uke-ishly big eyes!
Tyson: Goddammit.
(everyone appears behind Kenny's back out of nowhere)
Everyone else: OMG Tyson and Kai are gay! Why are we standing here, staring at you two like freaks, anyway?
Kai: Yeah, why?
Everyone: (sweatdrops) We have to get going! (leave)
Kai: Now let's get back to making out on this hard, uncomfortable floor.
Tyson: Why do I have to be uke?
Kai: You're younger and besides, I'm very difficult to write as uke; I usually turn out whimpering and weeping like a little girl, so let's just do it the easy way because the writer of this fic isn't very talented.
Tyson: OK!
The End, because you don't really want to take any chances with ff deleting your story for the awkward lemon you wrote.