Chapter 13

I don't own Gilmore Girls

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Lorelai was in a hurry to take a shower. She was already mentally going through her closet deciding the best thing to wear to pick out an engagement ring. She wanted to look perfect. But what do you wear to search for the perfect ring with your fiancé? Lorelai had no idea. With Max she hadn't gone with him to get the ring- she had told him through Rory what she wanted. But this was Luke. And he was perfect. They got to go together to get the perfect ring that would announce to the world that they were getting married. That they were in love. Lorelai was giddy. She wanted to hurry, and yet she wanted her hair and make-up perfect. When she got out the shower, and still couldn't decide what to wear, she picked up the phone to call Rory. Dialing the number, she suddenly stopped and realized something. Lorelai then raced down the stairs, dropping the phone as she went. When she ran into the kitchen, the smell of coffee barely hit her nose before she grabbed Luke's arm and dragged him back up the stairs. "Luke, a minute ago I was about to call Rory."

"Um, okay." Luke said as he sat on the bed, he knew there had to be more to the story.

"I was going to call her to ask her what to wear on our little shopping trip." She could barely get 'shopping trip' out without a giddy little squeal- but she wanted to be serious about this. She really needed Luke to know that she was in on this relationship. She felt like she couldn't let him know that enough. "And I realized that that is something that I did wrong when I was with Max. I- I didn't let him into my everyday life, things that I used to call Rory for I should be calling you for. Not, like always- I mean Rory is my best girl-friend, and favorite daughter, but YOU are my new best friend. And I need to let you into those kind of things." She looked at Luke, hoping that he didn't think that this was stupid. "So, I was hoping that you would help me decide what to wear."

"Lorelai, what can I do to prove to you that this relationship is for good? I am not going to walk away from it. I need you to believe me. So what is the problem?" Luke asked. What she had said was cute- and sweet, but she was trying to hard. He loved her, and it felt like she was trying to make up to him for all of the bad relationships she had ever had. It was a little frustrating. Luke wanted to move on. She had said she loved him- they were engaged. That was honestly enough for him. All this talk about old boyfriends and their 'boxes' made him think that this girl might have more emotional baggage then he was willing to deal with. He hadn't realized that it had bothered him until she had dragged him upstairs.

Lorelai was thrown off guard. "Um, Luke…..where is this coming from?" She was a little nervous.

"Lorelai, I just want to know why you think that you have to prove to me over and over that you care about me and this relationship. Between the old boyfriends' boxes, explaining that I am the first boyfriend you have let in the house, it's enough Lorelai. I know that you are in this. You don't have to prove it to me over and over again."

"Luke- I, I don't know." Lorelai had never really thought at she didn't have anything to offer a relationship besides sex. She just couldn't wrap her mind or heart around the fact that Luke found a lot more then the sex interesting about her. She had been acting out of deep hurts in her heart, and just the mention of those hurts made her tear up. Sure Luke had proven to her that he was in it for good, but her heart couldn't trust that yet.

"I love you, Lorelai. And I know that you love me. Do you need some time to decide how to believe me?" he said taking her hand.

"I- I love you Luke!" Lorelai said getting exasperated.

"Love me by trusting me. You don't have to prove anything. We are in this together."

"Maybe I can't trust that Luke." Lorelai whispered after a couple of moments. Something in her heart was just not going to let her have a real relationship, and that realization almost killed her. "Maybe I am just not supposed to have a lasting relationship! Maybe all of this is useless- Luke!" Something was deeply wrong with her. She had always wondered that deep inside- but Luke bringing it up brought it all home to her.

"Lorelai, its okay. That isn't true at all. Don't believe such things. Maybe things are going too quickly here. We haven't had much time to breathe since everything with us started. But I need you to believe me before we are engaged." He said taking her into his arms.

"What are you saying Luke?" Lorelai asked, hoping that it didn't mean what she thought that it did. If Luke was walking out of this, Lorelai would never recover.

"I'm just saying that I don't want you to have to try so hard at this. I want you to think about if you can trust me or not. I want all of you, Lorelai……that includes your trust."

"Luke I can trust you! Please believe me."

"I have no doubt that you want to. I just need you to give me your whole heart. I am not breaking up with you……I just really need this before we continue towards marriage."