Me: Heh-heh-heh…
Ed: Oh no… she has that evil glint in her eye…
Al: And she's listening to "My Immortal"…
Roy: This can't be good…
Me: A new fan fiction series… "Caught in the Act"…
Ed: What's it about if I may ask…
Me: Evil grin "Caught in the act" is an embarrassing series of the FMA cast's mistakes, or just embarrassing moments that others caught them doing…
Roy: Uh… Oh…
Me: First off we have the Roy Version…
Caught in the Act: Roy Mustang, The Cleaning Alchemist
"Colonel? Why is it that you find all this time to be lazy and do your paperwork but never find time to clean this office?" First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye asked Colonel Roy Mustang one afternoon when she found him asleep at his desk.
"Meh… Seen Second Lieutenant Havoc's office lately? It's a pigsty…" The Flame Colonel replied stretching out and putting his feet on his desk in a relaxed manner. 1st Lt. Hawkeye slapped at Col. Mustang's foot and he immediately put them down and looked her in the eyes. "Look, It's not my fault the others come in here and leave their crap on my floor, you think I mess my office up for pleasure?" Col. Mustang said in an annoyed tone.
"Actually, I'd believe that you do." 1st Lt. Hawkeye's blunt reply was before she turned and left the office, slamming his door as she exited.
"I'll show her I can clean an office…" Col. Mustang muttered and reached under his desk while reaching behind himself and closing the blinds. From under the desk emerged a bucket of cleaning supplies and was set on the desktop a pink frilly apron covering exactly WHAT kind of cleaning supplies were in the bucket.
Major Edward Elric stepped out of his office and stretched as best he could with a stack of signed forms in his arms. Behind him was a smaller boy who looked almost like Maj. Elric only with hair a darker shade than Maj. Elric's. This boy was the finally human again Second Lieutenant Alphonse Elric, Maj. Elric's younger brother. Both 2nd Lt. and Maj. Elric exchanged looks that said 'let's cause some trouble with Colonel Mustang' with identical malicious grins.
Maj. Elric and 2nd Lt. Elric dropped off the paperwork with 1st Lt. Hawkeye and both of them snuck over to Col. Mustang's office, malevolent grins in place.
"On three, we'll both burst in and shout something about miniskirts." Maj. Elric mouthed to his younger brother who grinned more broadly and nodded.
"One… Two…" 2nd Lt. Elric began but was silenced by what he heard through the door.
"Flippin' Hawkeye… Who the hell does she think she is? I'M the higher up, she should RESPECT me, not tell me what the flippin' hell to do." Col. Mustang's voice muttered loudly and both of the Elrics exchanged evil grins, to them it confirmed that the target: Colonel Roy Mustang was in his office. Maj. Elric grasped the doorknob and nodded to 2nd Lt. Elric who nodded back and mouthed the word "Three".
At that word Maj. Elric opened the door and both brothers shouted that 1st Lt. Hawkeye was wearing a miniskirt with her uniform but stopped when they saw the following scene before them.
"Oh my god! Roy's a girl! It's like Christmas!" 2nd Lt. Elric said aloud staring at Col. Mustang and the sidesplitting sight before them.
Col. Mustang was wearing a pair of yellow rubber gloves, a frilly pink apron, carried a sponge in one hand with a duster in his other, and to top it all off his cheeks were tinged with a bright reddish pink tone. Maj. Elric's Jaw dropped and 2nd Lt. Elric began to snicker slightly. Col. Mustang however threw down the duster and sponge in a rage, and both of the Elrics sensing that Col. Mustang was angered ran from the room laughing at the once mighty Flame Colonel in his pink frilly apron. The only thing that could be heard from the room was Col. Mustang's shouting as he said:
"I'LL GET YOU BOTH FOR THIS! I'LL KILL YOU BOTH!"
Me: Hum… I think I over did the ranks…
Roy: …
Me: I thank my mother for this idea as she made me clean the stairs and bathrooms, it gives me too much thinking time…
Ed: Frilly pink apron? Lols That's pretty manly of you Roy!
Al: Just giggles like a girl …
Me: Yeah… I over did the ranks… I'll have to skip them next installment…
Al: Chokes on laughter …
Me: Roy in a frilly pink apron isn't that funny Al… Shakes head at the giggling Elrics
Please note: this is the result of no sleep, Coffee, chores, Evanesance, and Miniskirtism… Miniskirtism is a dictatorship in which all women of the military are forced to wear tiny mini-skirts. It's a philosophy. Example: Roy Mustang, our favorite Pink frilly apron wearing, Flame Colonel. I started this "Caught in the Act" Fic because I was bored and had nothing better to do. I couldn't call Kaylee to ask her about what I should do to a certain Flame Alchemist so I'm dedicating this to my mom, who gave me the idea, and Elizabeth Olsen, who I got to talk to today after months of trying to get a hold of her. Elizabeth: You're my inspiration on this fic! Contact me sometime!