Disclaimer: Don't own Inuyasha characters or song, but plot and all other characters are MINE! So is the plot!

Summary: A year after the time portal closed and separated Inuyasha and Kagome, Kagome walks home one late night and remembers the love of her life. "If the portal hadn't closed, I'd be by his side... Inuyasha... my love, what are you doing now? My life would be so much different right now if you were here..."

Sad Melody

"...in a night lit by the stars that are bound to that time..."

By: Yóru no Chandra

Song: Anti-Nostalgic

Belongs to: Kotani Kinya

Song also belongs to: Gravitation

Transparency dyes the night sky, and

I walk alone on the road that always lead home.

The night sky was covered with bright, translusant stars. They had been her roof many months ago because she had wanted it so. To be near the man she loved, Kagome had willingly slept under these bright and seemingly neverending stars. Happy to share that beautiful dark sky glittered with these stars with him, with Inuyasha.

But now it no longer was so...

The Well of Time, as she recently found it was called by those who new of its power, closed on her, she no longer could return to her friends and the man she loved.

It wasn't fair, she loved Inuyasha... She still loved him, but the well had closed on her...

'No need to dwell on the past... I have suffered much because I dwelled on it... So why dwell on it now? It makes no sence... Not unless the stars are trying to remind me of those days... Now that's stupid... right? Stars trying to remind me of... those days. HaHaHa, stars don't care one way or the other about us...' Kagome thought as she turned a desolate corner that during the day was full with everyday poeple going about their days in a ritualistic manner.

"But I still love him..."

Singing to myself, I want to send these kinds of feelings

to you in your sleep, oh ,um...

"How time flies... doesn't it, shining stars that never age?" She said as she looked up at the stars. After so long... a year... Had it been a year all ready? No, it had been a bit longer than that... She still felt the pain whenever she was alone with the stars... The very ones she had spend so much time under with Inuyasha and their friends.

In an attempt to dislodge herself from the pain that was welling up inside of her, Kagome lowered her head to look straight ahead. 'A year... oh, dear... it's been a year... full of anguish, full of bitterness, of sadness and full of tears, night and day...'

A silent and lonely tear fell down one of her cheeks as she stubbornly kept her head from rising to the stars above.

I'm tangled up in something; I'm getting a little sick of myself --

tangled up in the feelings to convey to those days that have been left behind...

The heart I've forgotten somewhere is starting to hurt a little.

I keep searching for you in a night lit by the stars that are bound to that time.

"It hurts... Stupid Inuyasha! It hurts, why aren't you here to console me in that acward way of yours...why?" Kagome quietly half ranted, half sobbed as her sight began to blurr.

As quickly as she noticed her blurry eye-sight, Kagome reached up and rubbed her teary eyes dry.

After months of supressing her pain, why had it come beack now? 'Because your returning home for the first time in eleven months.' Her mind reminded her. Yes, she was returning home... After the portal closed, Kagome's life changed. People she had never met came for her and introduced themselves as her cousins from her father's side of the family.

"Why have you come now? I've never met you... Why now?" Kagome had asked them that day a month or so after the Well of Time had closed on her.

Their response had been simply put as, "We could not go against fate... Your life was interwined with Inuyasha-san and we could not come forth until this time."

Time was a bit of a blurr after that. Kagome was taken from her home and trained. Day in and day out, so much that during the day she only felt a small pang of pain in her heart. For three months she was put through hell brought to Earth.

After those three intense months, she was given her first 'assignment'. She accepted it, but was left drained of emotions after that. As the weeks passed, Kagome took 'assignment' after 'assignment', putting herself in danger countless of times to get what she was told in her 'assignments'. Why did she take them? She didn't quite know herself. Maybe to dim the pain in her heart and soul, or maybe to fill her time with activities that would and could end her life at any moment if she didn't pay attention. The thrill of being close to death was addictive to her... yes, she did want to die because the pain would never leave her heart and soul.

Countless of times she had been hurt and near death's door, but they wouldn't let her die. Those bastards! They healed her enough to take her away from death's welcoming door and then left her body to heal the rest of the way to perfect condition. While she healed, the pain, bitterness and sadness that had been supressed in the weeks her 'assignments' took to accomplish came back and engulfed her, leaving her a sobbing wreck.

I place my feelings on the receding clouds

on the road home, where I pause to stand.

'That's how my life had been for the past eleven months.' Kagome tought as she stopped and looked up the shrine stairs.

Yesterday, however, she had been called up to the family's leader and had been told to return home. She hadn't questioned why, but had simply asked when she would return to her 'work'. The family leader looked up at her and actually smiled, saying that she would be called up when she was needed and to take this time as a vacation. And that was how she ended up walking home, this cold December night.

Kagome paused where she stood and kept on staring up the empty stairs. The pain was engulfing her again. This time much stronger than the other times. Maybe because she had returned to the place where this pain, bitterness and sorrow had originated from. Or maybe because she was alone with the stars again...

Another tear fell from her eyes and this time the miko did nothing to intersect its path.

You are already a part of my continuing dreams;

I know that (those feelings) can't possibly reach you from here.

A quiet sob followed the tear, and that was followed by even more tears and even more sobs, until they racked her body and had her off balance. Dropping her leather bag, Kagome fell to her knees, trembling from the anguish the sorrow caused inside her heart.

Her long hair fell at her sides and landed in pools on the floor. It had growned much in these long months. A subconscious way to be closer to Inuyasha. Now it was longer than his, falling to just above her knees. She had not understood why it had grown so rappedly, but had been reasured by her cousins that it was due to the shampoo she was given, some type of plant that was an ingredient in it had this affect on the hair. And she had not cutt it since.

'Love... Inuyasha where are you?... I need you...' She wailed inside her mind as she slowly stood and grabbed her bag. A moment later, Kagome took one small and hesitant step forward.

"If the portal hadn't closed, I'd be by his side... Inuyasha... my love, what are you doing now? My life would be so much different right now if you were here..." Kagome once again spoke sobbingly out loud to no one in particular, but, probably, to the ghost that would always be by her side. The ghost of the man the held a firm grip in her heart and wouldn't let go no matter how much she unwillingly struggled against it.

Another hesitant step brought Kagome closer to the place she had lived for the first fifteen years of her life.

The tears keep falling; just by being able to be close to you,

I'm starting to want to smile, just a little...

Someone asks questions; I'm starting to want this to make more sense.

You cast those too-brilliant days into a fading shadow.

Another step and she froze.

What if the Well of Time was opened now? What if..."NO!" Kagome yelled harshly at herself and the thoughts that began to form in her mind. Without hesitation, she reached up to her face and rubbed almost violently the tears and streaks those tears had caused from her face.

No she couldn't think that way again. She would only end up hurting herself again just like she had for the month that followed the Well of Time's closing. Lowering her head, Kagome took a few uncounted deep breaths and tried to, again, supress her raging storm of distructive emotions.

When she had control of her feelings again, Kagome cuntinued her slow and agonizing way up the all to familiar Higurashi Shrine steps.

As she walked past the half way point she shed another lonely tear. And again she stopped its desent as soon as she felt it on her cheeks.

I'm tangled up in something; I'm getting a little sick of myself --

tangled up in the feelings to convey to those days that have been left behind...

The heart I've forgotten somewhere is starting to hurt a little.

I keep searching for you in a night lit by the stars that are bound to that time

'Inuyasha can you feel the pain I suffer... I've returned and I will let you go as was fate's desision... But that wont stop my love for you or the pain I suffer. Nor will it stop me from looking up at the shimmering stars that we once saw together and remember you, silently searching for you in the dark heavens glittered with those stars that are the same ones we once looked up at...The same ones that witnessed how I was thrown back in time to meet you, how I fell in love with you and how I was ripped from you side. And now, the same ones that have watched as I once again shed tears for our love that never was...'

The walk up the steps was silent, not even nature made a sound, as if nature itself, was mourning with the young girl the love that was ripped from its roots before it had a chance to come out of the dark and rich soil that was the warm bond Inuyasha and Kagome had begun to form.

A/N: Working on second part of story and it should be up by next week. This is a triology with Kagome in first part, Inuyasha in second and the third part will take about two weeks or so after thesecond part is uploaded. Well review and tell me what you think or don't review, it's up to you. Ja'ne.

Yoru no Chandra.