Title: Conferences

Author: Nemesis
Rating: PG-13

Pairing: HP/SS

Summary: Harry and Severus must attend parent-teacher conferences about all 15 kids.

Disclaimer: Not mine. Damnit!

Elena tossed a braided pigtail over her shoulder and pulled out a new notebook and pencil. She glanced up and back down at her page, sketching quickly and looking back up again. The picture grew under her pencil: a young boy kicking a soccer ball into a goal.

She reached for her colored pencils and began coloring the picture, choosing each shade carefully. She finally sat back, looking at her picture, satisfied.

"Hey, that looks half-good," a voice called from above her. Elena dropped the pad, startled. She looked up and glared. Marc dropped out of the tree and landed next to her. He nudged her arm with his elbow. Sighing, she showed him the picture.

"Looks great," he said appreciatively. Elena looked around suspiciously then animated it. Marc smiled as he watched the young boy in the picture kick the ball into the goal. Elena stopped it again.

Marc smiled and tapped her shoulder. "Time to go."

Elena nodded and stood up, gathering her things. She slid the notebook and pencils into her bag and slung it over her shoulder. She brushed the grass off of her school uniform. Marc adjusted his tie slightly, and they headed into the school.

They sat down next to each other, waiting patiently for the others to arrive. They were often early to school because of Harry and Severus' busy teaching schedule. Neither of them minded being early: it gave them a chance to relax and prepare themselves for the school day.

Slowly, their class began filing in. James immediately sat down next to Marc, giving the fifth grader a high-five. He leaned forward and greeted Elena, who answered in kind. Elena's friend, Charlotte, sat down next to Elena and smiled. The two of them began talking excitedly. Elena pulled out her sketchpad and showed her picture to Charlotte, making sure that it was still.

Charlotte smiled and gave her a thumbs-up.

The teacher walked in, shutting the door behind her. Everyone fell silent immediately and looked at the teacher expectantly. It was three-quarters through the school year.

She walked to the front of the classroom. "As you all know, parent-teacher conferences are coming up soon. When I call your name, I'd like you to come up and get a notice for you to give to your parents. I must have this signed and returned by no later than Friday. Is that understood?"

Twenty-five kids nodded and answered in unison, "Yes, Mrs. Owens."

Mrs. Owens smiled and began calling students up.

Finally she reached "Potter-Snape, Elena."

Elena stood up and went to retrieve the notice.

"Marc, you don't need to come up. That covers the both of you."

Marc nodded.

That night, Elena handed the note to Harry and Severus, who sighed. "Lovely, another conference to attend," Severus remarked.

"Hey, we only have four to attend," Harry replied.

"Yeah, but fifteen kids total to discuss."

"And just whose fault would that be?" Harry demanded.

"Hey, I freely admit it's mine. But that doesn't stop me from voicing my dislike of the current situation."

Harry smiled and sat down next to his husband, slinging an arm over the dour Potions Master. "Ah, well, at least I don't mind this life," he teased.

Severus mock-frowned at his husband. "Neither do I. You know that quite well, Professor Potter," he answered, slightly annoyed.

"Believe me, I do," Harry answered, smiling widely.

Harry and Severus sat down across from Mrs. Owens, Elena and Marc's teacher.

"So how is Elena doing?" Harry asked, dressed casually in a green t-shirt and jeans.

"She is doing very well. She is exceptionally studious and very dedicated to her studies. I've noticed she loves to draw as well. She's very good at it, did you know?"

Harry and Severus nodded. "One of the walls in our living room is reserved for hanging our children's pictures," Severus explained. He was dressed in slacks and a button-down shirt, preferring to be more formal.

"Marc is doing very well as well. He, like his sister, is studious. I've noticed he loves to play soccer."

Harry smirked at his husband, who rolled his eyes. "Potter, just because you were enamored with that sport does not mean your son will share similar inclinations. Nor will he do it so young in life." Harry nodded dubiously, still smirking.

"You just can't handle that we have another apt player in this family instead of following your childhood love," Harry teased.

Severus sniffed haughtily. "How do you know that? After all, none of them have had the chance to prove that one true or false yet."

"Yeah, but it's obvious. C'mon, Marc'll follow in my footsteps."

"Excuse me, gentlemen, but if you two could leave this for later? Thanks." Mrs. Owens flashed them an insincere smile and turned back to the reports.

"I do have one worry about these two. They are very sly and mischievous, and it bothers me a bit. They're wily, those two, and very secretive."

Severus smirked at Harry. "Ha!" he cried in triumph.

"Ha, what?" Harry asked. "I've known that since they were five! Besides, you'll have to discipline them then."

Severus glared at his husband.

"Gentlemen!" Mrs. Owens cried.

"Our apologies."

"Do you two at least know what you're talking about? Because I certainly can't follow."

"Oh, we know," Severus assured her. "Old running joke between us. Very old running joke between us."

Harry chuckled, and Severus rolled his eyes at Harry.

"I also have one more thing. This is a bit delicate. Mrs. Wilfred – Charlotte's mother – has brought it to my attention that Elena has never gone to a social event, or has even gone over to her house. Nor has she invited Charlotte over, despite the fact that they are clearly friends. Mrs. Aerie – James' mother – has also said similar things about Marc. Both of them were worried about the possibility of neglect, which, I'm afraid, is augmented by this fantasy Elena and Marc seem to have."

"What fantasy?" Severus asked sharply.

"They say they have thirteen brothers and sisters."

Harry sighed in relief. "They do have thirteen brothers and sisters. Severus and I have fifteen children. We try our best to give as much attention to each one as we can, but sometimes it's a little difficult, especially with a loaded teaching schedule."

"And the other matter?"

Severus shifted impatiently in his seat.

"It is a difficult and delicate matter, I'm afraid. It's not something we can discuss. But I assure you, the children are fine."

Mrs. Owens nodded doubtfully. "I may have to alert…"

"There is no need," Severus said, his voice laced with magical suggestion.

Mrs. Owens blinked a few times and nodded.

"About next year," she began.

"They will not be attending school here next year," Severus cut in. "They will be going to a private facility."

"My gosh, they do turn eleven next year," Harry sighed softly. "Time flies."

The conference wound up slowly, and Harry and Severus stood, shaking Mrs. Owens' hand and wishing her a good day.

They sat down across from Mr. Ermine. "Good afternoon, Mr. and Mrs. Potter-Snape." greeted them automatically, staring at some files.

Harry and Severus looked at each other, shocked.

Mr. Ermine looked up. "My apologies," he said. He scratched his head and looked through his papers.

"Aide me," he asked.

"Professors Potter and Snape," Severus supplied immediately.

"Ah, yes, thank you. I'm terribly sorry, I've had nothing but parent-teacher conferences this week and my brain is fried."

"No problem," Harry answered smoothly. "We're both teachers, so we understand."

"Very well, let's start with Avidius Cassius."

"How is Avidius doing?"

"He's doing very well. Hard-working to a fault, I think, and has an insatiable desire for knowledge."

"Oh dear," Severus sighed. "Won't Filius be thrilled?"

Harry rolled his eyes.

"Avidius also seems quite interested in books and science."

"Ha!" Severus cried. "I told you so!"

"Severus, we have fifteen kids. Odds are, one of them will follow in your dreary footsteps."

"Not all of us have the luxury to follow in your footsteps," Severus shot back.

"Well, not all of are insane enough to make a living the way you do!"

Mr. Ermine blinked. "What is going on?" he asked.

"Nothing," Severus answered.

"Just something we've been discussing for years now."

"Very well, that about covers Avidius," Mr. Ermine said after some more discussion. "Now, about Hyacinth."

"Yes?" Harry asked.

"She's less attentive than Avidius is, I must say. She does try, but she's not as quick. She absolutely adores drawing, and she's amazingly good."

"Much like Elena is," Severus added.

"Elena? Your wife?" Mr. Ermine asked.

"No, no," Harry chuckled. "Our eldest daughter. I think Elena taught Hyacinth how to draw."

"Ah."

Not much later, they turned their attention to Sargon.

"Hot-headed, that one," Mr. Ermine observed. "He's very protective of his friends and not at all afraid to stand up for them."

"Ha!" Harry cried in triumph.

"Oh, come off it. Chances are, at least one of them has to end up there."

"Studious, too, but always ready to slack off if he can get the chance."

"You through and through," Severus smirked. Harry understood him to mean 'Gryffindor' as opposed to Harry himself.

Eventually, they turned to Serena.

"She's just like Sargon. Hot-headed, rash, and not entirely studious."

"Ha-ha!" Harry cried again.

"Like Elena and Marc are going to follow in my footsteps," Severus smirked.

After a while, they bid farewell to Mr. Ermine.

They entered Ms. Jinari's classroom and sat down at the table.

"How are they?" Severus asked.

Ms. Jinari chuckled. "The four I have are doing fine. I'm not sure about the other five, though."

"I'm glad to seen nobody was insane enough to saddle you with all nine," Severus smiled.

"So am I. I love your kids dearly, but the four I have are already chatter-bugs."

Harry shrugged. "They're used to amusing themselves, since we can hardly play with all fifteen at once."

"Let's start with Abigail," Ms. Jinari suggested. "She's very bright and doing quite well, although she has a mischievous streak to her. Small pranks, but she really knows how to get under kids' skin. For instance, one of the girls – Lucy – is very fond of her long, blond hair, and she's always boasting about it and flaunting it."

"Oh, dear," Severus sighed, Abby having inherited his hair. Black, stringy, and slightly greasy if not washed often and thoroughly. "That would incense her."

"It did. One day – making it look completely accidental – Abby managed to get paint and play-dough in Lucy's braid. Lucy had to cut a great deal of her hair off, since neither would come out at all, and it simply entangled her hair further."

Harry frowned. "I never heard about this."

"Like I said, it seemed like an innocent accident, but Abby confessed to me not that long ago. One of the boys, Alex, had a toy car he played with as often as possible. He was always bragging about how great it was and what it could do."

"Sweet Circe," Harry moaned. "Abby hates cars and hearing about them."

"She was content enough just to glare at him every time he mentioned it, but it was a sore spot. One day, Alex shoved in her face and kept on about his great toy car. Next day, she had managed to ruin the doors of the car. No idea how."

"They don't sound like small pranks to me," Severus frowned.

Ms. Jinari nodded. "Those are the worst she's done. She knows how to annoy students without taking drastic measures."

"Well, I know where she'll be," Harry smiled to Severus, who snarled.

"There's one child I will not have an easy time with."

After discussing Abby's general mischievous streak, they turned to Darius.

"Wonderful boy. Always on his sister's case for her pranks. Never lets her get away with it if he can."

"He's really into fairness," Severus sighed.

Ms. Jinari frowned. "Is there something wrong with that?"

"Ignore him. He was raised in a slightly odd way," Harry explained, glaring at his erstwhile husband.

Ms. Jinari nodded dubiously. "I believe you."

Finally having finished all of their parent-teacher conferences with Ms. Jinari, Harry and Severus bid her farewell and headed to Mr. Seltar's classroom.

"A pleasure to meet you, Professors," Mr. Seltar said absent-mindedly, rifling through files.

He looked up and frowned. "You look awfully familiar," he remarked to Severus.

Severus shrugged. "I've been told that before."

Mr. Seltar shook his head and pulled out five files. "Let's start with Alexys," he suggested.

"How is she?" Harry asked, having, by now, pinned down the concerned parent slightly better than Severus.

"Oh, she's doing wonderfully. Mischievous little imp sometimes, but very sweet."

"Fascinating combination," Severus said sarcastically.

"Oh, be nice," Harry admonished. "What do you mean by mischievous?"

"Generally sly. She's clever, real quick on her feet, and exceptionally witty. Very funny. Occasionally a bit smug, but there's no true meanness in her."

Severus smirked at Harry. "I keep telling you they're mainly following in my footsteps."

Harry chuckled. "Yeah, but then you have to deal with them all."

Mr. Seltar put down his pen suddenly. "Professor Snape?" he asked incredulously, looking at a copy of Alexys' birth certificate.

"Yes, that's me," Severus answered, slightly worried. "Why?"

"Do you teach at Hogwarts?" Mr. Seltar asked.

Severus and Harry exchanged shocked glances.

"Never mind," Mr. Seltar sighed. "I thought…"

"Yes," Severus answered. "Why?"

"Because I went there," Mr. Seltar explained. "Professor Snape was my Potions Professor. I suppose that would mean you were…"

Severus frowned, trying to remember. "Ah yes, I remember. Class of '73. Not a whit of talent amongst you lot. You sat third row, off to the left. You were one of Filius' bunch. Horribly uninspired."

Mr. Seltar blushed. "Well, I was hoping you had forgotten that part."

"I never forget the talented ones, and since I clearly didn't remember you, you weren't one of my talented ones."

Mr. Seltar nodded. "I wasn't particularly good at Potions," he admitted.

"Why'd you leave?" Severus asked. "The Wizarding World, I mean."

Mr. Seltar shrugged. "Things were getting really tense with Voldemort, so I just left our world and entered the Muggle one. I was safer here than there."

"Do you ever think of returning?"

"Not while Voldemort's alive."

Severus chuckled. "How many years have you been gone?"

"25. Dear Merlin."

"Do you have any way of getting news from the Wizarding World?"

"Not a single one. I'm getting pretty set into the Muggle way of life, though. I've stopped wishing desperately for Voldemort's death so that I could return."

"Pity. I defeated Voldemort 20 years ago," Harry answered.

Mr. Seltar stared at him, wide-eyed. "You mean he's dead? Gone?"

"Completely."

"Wow. I… I don't know what I am going to do now."

Harry shrugged.

Mr. Seltar looked at Harry. "So you're Harry Potter, huh? I remember when you defeated Voldemort the first time. I left after he rose again. It's been 20 years… my god, my life!"

"I know," Severus said sympathetically. "I didn't start to truly live until about 15 years ago." He smiled at Harry.

Harry grinned back.

They wrapped up the conference and left.

"I can't believe it's been 20 years since Voldemort's defeat," Harry sighed at home.

"I thought you were going to say something else."

"What?"

"That you can't believe you've put up with me for 15 years."

Harry frowned. "I love you. I've loved you for nearly 16 years. Of course I'm not surprised. I could put up with you for another 15 years, and then some."

Severus smiled. "Me too, Harry, me too."

-- End.