Taste Of Darkness
You know the feeling you get when you first walk into a dark room? The thrill of having your eyes open and still seeing nothing? You know how after your eyes adjust, you can see? All you want to do is go back our into the light so you can have the thrill of darkness again. You feel fearless. What happens when it becomes an addiction? When all you want to do is stay in the dark? When it's not a game anymore? Can anyone help you love light again? And just where does it start? Your first taste of darkness is the most addicting.
Jeremie's pov
I can't find her again. Yumi knows where she is I bet, Aelita tells her everything. I'm afraid to ask though. I'm not sure I want to know. It's Friday night. Everyone's in Odd and Ulrich's dorm. It's become a ritual. Friday night, we pick a room and everyone piles in for the night. I'm pulled out of my thoughts as I walk into the room. Odd is on top of Samantha tickling her. Sam is red faced with laughter. Yumi and Ulrich are sitting off to the side laughing at our friends.
"Hey Jer," Yumi says with a bright smile. She's been like that lately, bright and cheery. Her and Ulrich started dating a week ago.
"Have you seen Aelita?" I ask. They stop laughing.
"Not again," Yumi groans.
"She promised she'd come." She did. After lunch, when our classes get split, she promised. This is the third Friday princess hasn't showed up.
"I'll get her," Yumi sighed. I hated the look of pity on her face. I didn't want pity, I wanted Aelita.
"No, I'll get her this time. Where is she?" I asked. She looked unsure and the others stayed quiet. It felt like everyone knew a secret that I didn't. It was a helpless feeling.
"Jer," she started. "Jou know I love Lita like a sister. I told her I wouldn't tell anyone where she was." Ulrich held her in his lap supportively. It made me ache even more for Aelita.
"Yumi, this has to stop. It's gone far enough." She looked away. Yumi knew I was right.
"She's at the Hermitage," she whispered.
"Thanks Yumi." I left. What am I going to say to her? How do you tell someone that it's time to stop? She loves life, but she's left reality it seems. Its fall now, a bit chilly. It's her favorite season. She's always pushing the weather, seeing how cold it has to be for her until she has to put a jacket on. Now I'm at the edge of the woods, and nearing the Hermitage. She'll be in her old room with the lights off. Sometimes she'll cry, sometimes she'll laugh. Either way, it's loud, and it's hard. I don't know why, and I've never had the nerve to ask. There are some nights where I go to get her and she'll leave a message on her computer screen for me saying she's gone out for a run in the dark. Some nights she doesn't even leave a message. It started a while ago. A fascination, then an addiction. No big deal though right? Wrong. Sure, it could be worse. Drugs or something. I could never dream of my princess doing that. Now though, she's starting to drop in grades, forgetting to eat, and … me. She forgets about our dates. Its not going any farther. I opened the door and slipped inside. Since this all started, I've hated the dark. I walk to her old bedroom. She's sitting in pitch black.
"Aelita?" I call out softly.
"Jeremie? Is that you? What are you doing here?" she asks. I know she can see me, but my eyes haven't adjusted to the dark yet.
"Jou have to stop." where is this coming from? This sudden courage. I answer my own question. I don't want to lose her.
"Stop?" she asks. I take a step farther into the room . I can make out her outline. She's sitting cross legged on her old bed. I walked over to her.
"Why do you sit in the dark?" I asked.
"I like the dark."
"Why?" She didn't answer. I sat down on the bed and she leaned into me."Lita," I whisper.
"I'm sorry." She was crying now. Her tears wet on my arms. "I don't know…" she broke off. I hugged her tightly.
"Does this have to do with your father?" I asked.
"No one can see you in the dark."
"You're reliving the past. Hiding from what isn't there anymore."
"You think?" she laughed."My first night in darkness, at Yumi's house, was intoxicating. It's one I can't remember from my past," she explained."It draws you in. I don't even know why I love it," she sighed.
"There's no darkness with out light." What does that have to do with anything Jeremie? Smooth. Why say that?
"So what do I do now?" she asked.
"Come with me," I take her hand and pull her outside. The street lights are bright. We head out of the woods I stop and look up.
"See?" I ask.
"Stars?" she laughs.
"Beautiful, huh?" she nods. Her eyes are sparkling.
"I thought I was trapped." the sparkles are really tears. I wrap my arms around her and she turns and cries into my chest. Right there, in the middle of the street. I never wanted to let go of her. Now at least, I had her back.
"Why don't we go to the dorms?" I ask wiping her tears. She nods. I lace my fingers in her and we start to walk again.
"Do you think.." she starts.
"What?"
"Do you think we could walk under the street lights?" We walk the rest of the way back to Kadic in the light. She tried to push the weather again tonight. She's in just a t-shirt and jeans. I give up my light weight blue wind breaker to her and she laughs. It's so good to hear that laugh. A real laugh. It's late, and dark. We hurry down the hall to Odd and Ulrich's room. There's a light chatter heard through the door. She stops me before we go in.
"Thank you Jeremie. I was losing myself.." I don't let her continue, I don't want to hear it. I press my lips to hers and wrap my arms around her waist. After the shock passes I suppose, she kisses back, wrapping her arms around my neck. Perfectly ruining the moment, is Odd opening the dorm door.
"Uh, didn't mean to interrupt," he laughs. We cut the kiss shorter than hoped.
"yeah, thanks alot," Aelita teases.
"I was just running down to the corner to get someone chips," Odd moves past us, still laughing. Aelita leads me into the room. She lets go of my hand as Yumi ambushes her with a hug. They both smile.
"I'm sorry I told," Yumi says.
"I'm sorry I didn't." it was one of those girl things that I will never be able to understand I suppose. Aelita lets go and comes back to me. I guess I was still standing in the doorway. She pulls me farther in and we sit on the floor against the bed. Well, actually, I sit on the floor against the bed. She sits comfortably on my lap. I wrap my arms around her protectively. I'll never let the dark get her again. The light would be doomed with out her. I would be. No one questions her about why she didn't come like she said, or what she was doing. It was a silent agreement. We would have fun tonight. I caught the very last part of what Yumi was saying.
"You should have seen my dad though!" she laughed. Ulrich nodded, not as amused.
"Yeah.. You should have seen how fast Odd could run, too." Aelita and Sam were laughing and the door opened again.
"Can't stop talking about me huh?" Odd asked, arms full. Sam and Aelita got up and helped him. This is the Aelita I know. This is the Aelita I love. The one who's cheerful, and bright. The one who's well.. Full of light.
A/n That's it. Lol. Review!
Rena