Time We'll Never Have

A/N: This story is dedicated to my fellow Rodimus Prime fan Uftaki... takes place between the movie and Season Three. Hope you enjoy!

"You wanted to see me?"

I fidgeted with my hands from the moment the door opened, only part of it due to the awkward position of summoning our new leader. This was our first chance to speak since Unicron's destruction. Everything changed in that short space of time... including things in me.

He looked much the same as before. The transformation added a little height, more bulk to his frame, perhaps some slight variations, but not enough to make him vastly different. Very little changed in his face plate, but I found the most profound change there. Hot Rod let things roll off his back with ease, even in the most stressful situations. In the face of Rodimus Prime, I saw etched every concern, every detail that his new role as leader pressed onto him.

"You've been busy," I said, and instantly found the words foolish. Perhaps the understatement of the year.

"There's a lot to do," he said, sitting down across from me. "I've sent out assessment teams across Cybertron, to find out how bad the damage is. Thank Primus that Shockwave agreed to help with the transition. I think he's as concerned with his subordinates and the fate of this planet as we are. Most of the other Decepticons have fled, but I'm hoping those that remain will accept Shockwave's rule."

I nodded, and peered back to the counter. "Did you want something to drink?"

A slight smile appeared, but then vanished into that unfamiliar focused look. "I probably shouldn't. When I'm done here, I've got to prepare for my first trip to Earth as commander. We're meeting with the United Nations... they want to ensure that they can offer some kind of support, if an attack like the one on Autobot City happens again. And... I'm not looking forward to the meeting with the Earth contingent of our forces."

"Whatever bothers you about that?"

"As Hot Rod, I wasn't exactly the most popular Autobot with a lot of them. And sometimes, it's hard to blame them. But I'm probably more concerned about the... transition. Even while he was missing all those years, Autobots believed in the return of Optimus Prime. He held the Matrix for millions of years. In his absence, Ultra Magnus led our forces. I'm just not sure how they're going to accept this. Four of Optimus's original crew have put in for retirement, wanting to help the restoration efforts on Cybertron."

I reached out and placed one of my hands on his. "Rodimus, maybe you shouldn't talk about all of that right now."

He smiled back at me, and for an instant I saw the old Hot Rod sitting across from me. "Maybe you're right. After all, I doubt you asked me here to listen to me complain."

My intakes pulled in as much air as possible. The time to tell him the truth finally came. For a long time, the two of us snarked at one another, our verbal battles often driving other Autobots crazy. Springer always joked that we needed to face the truth... that we loved one another.

I never believed that, until Hot Rod's ship went down in the escape from Earth. The pain that raced through my spark told the truth of feelings I'd kept hidden far too long. I pondered the future of my life without him, even as we fought against Galvatron's forces on the planet of Junk. When he appeared once again, the relief I felt... I couldn't express it in words. I just prayed that the time would come when I could confess everything I felt.

And now that I had him in front of me, my vocalizer couldn't force the words out.

"Rodimus..." I began, my hand clinging tightly to his.

His optics focused on my hand. It felt like my spark froze as he pulled away.

"Arcee," his voice came out low, serious. "I know why you asked me here."

"Y-you do?"

He was silent a moment longer. He then stood up, turned away from me. "I understand how you feel. And I feel the same way."

I stood up, feeling optic fluid starting to well up. "If that's the case, then why--"

"The Matrix chose me. There are so many responsibilities I have to fill, things I don't feel like I'm up to. There's so much to do, so much that we can do, now that we hold Cybertron again. Every waking moment, it feels like the weight of the entire galaxy is resting on my shoulders. Do you think you can really be happy living like that?"

"I'll be happy as long as I'm with you, Hot Rod!"

He said nothing for a moment. Then, "Hot Rod is gone. I've been chosen as Prime. For the first time in my life, I'm going to put my own selfish desires behind everything else. Even... even the things I want most in the universe."

He started to leave, but I ran over and grabbed his shoulder. "Can't we just give it a chance...?"

Pushing my hand away, he walked to the door. "Sorry, Arcee. I'm done taking chances."

--

"Hey, wake up."

My optics barely managed to focus on the green and yellow form in front of me. I winced at all the high grade mugs that lined the table.

"Long night, kid?" he said, smiling.

"Yeah, I think so."

"Our fearless leader is heading off to Earth in a little while. Magnus is going with him, so Kup's in charge here for the time being." He slid into the chair opposite me, a smug look on his face. "So, is this is a private party, or could you stand for some company?"

I smiled back at him. "Springer... that sounds really nice."