Chapter 1: The Beginning of the Insanity

This is the fic that never ends. It goes on and on my friends. Some people started reading without knowing what it was. And now they keep on reading it, forever just because it is the Fic that never ends...

In a galaxy not so far away, there was a story. But not just any story, a story about a boy. But not just any boy, a teenage boy. But not just any teenage boy, a rightly-so angry teenage boy. One day, the rightly-so angry teenage boy (who from now on shall be called Harry) went to the store. But not just any store, a magic store. But not just any magic store, an evil magic store.

When Harry got to the evil, magic store (which is called "This Store Has No Evil, or T. SHiNE) he was quite troubled. Let us now use Legitimacy to read his thoughts. The story shall continue from his viewpoint.

"I'm quite troubled," thought Harry, as he stood outside T. SHiNE. "I know what T. SHiNE means, but if a store says that there is no evil, why would there be evil in the store? And where did the 'I' come from? This is very troubling!"

Now the story shall stop reading his thoughts, for they are becoming quite off subject. Behind him was a girl. But not just any girl, a teenage girl. But not just any teenage girl, an annoyed teenage girl. But not just any annoyed teenage girl, a really annoyed teenage girl. This girl's name was Hermione, and we shall henceforth call her so.

Hermione looked at T. SHiNE and scowled, thinking, "This is a stupid store. This is a really stupid store. This is a really, really stupid store. Harry's being stupid, he's being really, really stupid. The name of the store is really…"

Well, moving onward.

Next to Hermione, there was another boy, but not just any boy, a red-haired boy. Not just any red-haired boy, a teenage red-haired boy. Not just any teenage red-haired boy, a singing teenage red-haired boy. This boy's name was Ron. Ron was singing a song under his breath, but not just any song, a stupid song. But not just any stupid song, an annoying, stupid song that was to the tune of "It's a Small World": 'It's a horcrux after all, it's a horcrux after all…'

This was why Harry was mad and Hermione annoyed. The name T.SHiNE was just making it worse and, needless to say, when the owner of T.SHiNE came out, the moods were not improved.

The owner was very tall, and, at the moment, was very annoyed. He was trying to shoot his commercial, but it was not working in his favor. Let's take a look.

"Drat!" he thought, "Once again, I completely messed up! I killed my unofficial spokesperson, and now have no one to be in my commercial! I think I'll walk outside and try to find some random famous who might just be standing right outside the door!"

Meanwhile, outside T.SHiNE, Harry just noticed that his two best friends were standing right behind him.

"Oh!" said Harry in surprise, "I just noticed that my two friends were standing right behind me!"

"Well duh!" scoffed Hermione, now looking, if possible, even more annoyed, "The author just said that!"

Harry's quite rude response to this was cut off by the owner of T.SHiNE coming out of his store. Harry and Hermione jumped back in shock, while Ron continued to sing songs about death, Horcruxes, and Tony the Tiger.

The owner of T.SHiNE had a past. But not just any past, an evil past. But not just any evil past, an evil past filled with murder! But not just any evil past filled with murder, an evil past filled with the murder of 201 people! Let's watch the next part from Ron's viewpoint, via Legitimacy.

I love singing… singing is so fun… Oh! Look! An evil person with an evil look on his ugly face is coming out of this stupid shop… I wonder if he's going to sing? I hope he sings. I love singing… singing is so fun…

Well, seeing as we won't learn anything new from him right now…

The owner of T.SHiNE had a very evil look on his face, as Ron stated, and then he saw Harry.

"Harry Potter! Oh my goodness! Harry Potter is outside! You're Harry Potter! Oh my goodness! You're Harry Potter! Harry Potter is…"

"Yes. He's Harry Potter! Now shut up or face the wrath of Ginny Weasley bad-boogie hex!" Hermione screeched, as a very surprised Ginny appeared out of thin air.

"Why am I here?" Ginny asked.

"Because the author needed you for plot purposes," Harry shrugged.

"Well that's stupid. I'm going home," Ginny muttered as she stalked off, leaving the author of the story not much further than she was when she passed this off to her friend to continue it, due to her brain block for which she most sincerely apologizes for.