"Apparently there have been complaints about the state of the break room," Gibbs announced when Tony, Kate, McGee and Abby were all in the bullpen. "We've been ordered to make sure it's spotless every time we leave it," he said through clenched teeth. In his opinion, his team had more important matters to attend to that the cleanliness of the lunchroom.
"I didn't even know we had a break room," Abby said as she sat on the edge of her boss' desk, swinging her legs.
"Yeah it's all well and good for you Abbs, you can keep all your stuff down in your lab, but we have to battle it out against the other office employees in a fight for food, coffee and freedom!" Tony stood from his chair with a fist in the air. "I, for one, am sick of the slobs in this place not tidying up after themselves. Dirty dishes in the sink, crumbs on the table and mouldy food in the fridge – it's disgusting."
"Wow Tony, I had no idea you were so passionate about cleanliness," McGee said.
"Per-lease," Kate interjected. "The only thing Tony's passionate about is himself," she said, rolling her eyes. "He's the reason they had to put a memo out in the first place."
"What do you mean?" McGee asked as Tony tried unsuccessfully to glare at the back of Kate's head.
"Have you ever seen Tony do one bit of washing up? Ever seen him even tidy up anything that wasn't absolutely compulsory?" There was a pause. "No, you haven't, because he's the main cause of the break room being a mess!"
"That is not true Katie," Tony protested feebly. Kate simply gave him a look. "Yeah well they should have a cleaner for all that anyway. Or at least a dishwasher," he grumbled.
"DiNozzo!" Gibbs bellowed and the three agents turned their attention to his desk. Kate tried not to laugh when she noticed Abby was now discretely colouring her boss' nails with a black felt-tip.
"Go clean the break room now," he commanded.
"But Boss -"
"No buts DiNozzo, just go. And be quick about it."
Tony gave Kate a scowl which she returned with a grin.
"Kate, go with him. I'm not even sure he knows how to clean up," Gibbs said.
Kate sighed and followed a now grinning Tony toward the break room. Just before they reached the room Kate heard Gibbs' exasperated voice.
"Abby!"
xXxXxXxXxXxXxX
The room was empty when the two agents arrived. They both groaned simultaneously when they set eyes upon the mountain of dirty dishes in the sink.
"See Katie, it isn't all me," he pouted.
"I'll wash, you dry and put away. Deal?"
"Deal."
After 10 minutes of Tony's whinging and complaints, they developed a sort of rhythm and worked away in silence.
Suddenly a great SNAP! sounded and Kate squealed in surprise.
"DiNozzo!" she gasped as he stood there grinning at her and holding the tea-towel. "I can't believe you just did that!"
Tony said nothing and went back to drying dishes. Shaking her head, Kate reluctantly returned to washing.
Several moments later the silence was broken yet again when Tony whipped Kate on the backside with the towel.
"That is it DiNozzo!" she cried as she squirted him with a water bottle.
"Oh! This is a good shirt!"
"Then you have serious style problems. I'm doing you a favour," Kate then gave in to her childish side and poked her tongue out at him.
"This, Agent Todd, is war."
Tony grabbed the wet sponge and threw it at Kate's head. She responded by grabbing a handful of bubbles and running at him. She then smeared them all down the side of his face and laughed.
"Oh so you wanna play dirty eh?"
"I thought that was the only way you played."
Kate was eyeing her surroundings for anything useful as ammo and didn't notice Tony pick up the dishwashing liquid. The next thing she knew, she was on the ground with Tony on top of her. He was holding the bottle of liquid dangerously close to her and had a wicked glint in his eye.
"Tony…" she warned. He ignored the hint of caution in her voice and slowly tipped the bottle more and more until it threatened to spill its contents all over her clothes. Kate kept eye contact with him while reaching her hand out toward the sponge lying on the ground near them. She was an inch or two too far away to reach though without making it obvious what she was doing.
In a sudden move, Kate brought her head up and licked Tony up the side of the face that wasn't covered with bubbles. In the one motion she also reached that extra distance and got hold of the sponge. When she pulled back she laughed inwardly at the perfect goldfish impersonation Tony was fashioning. Kate winked at him before shoving the wet sponge into his open mouth and squirming her way out from under him while he was busy trying to spit out the soapy suds.
She snatched the bottle of detergent before pinning him on the floor face down. She sat on his back with the bottle positioned over his head.
"I wonder why they don't make lemon shampoo…"
"No, no, no! Please Katie, not the hair!"
She laughed at his pathetic pleading.
"Why shouldn't I?"
"I'll buy you dinner for a week! No, a month!"
"Hmm… keep going…"
"I'll… I'll walk Toni whenever you want."
"And…"
"And… um, just name your price Katie."
"You stop calling me Katie!"
"OK, OK! Just let me get up!"
Before Kate could get up and let him free, however, the door to the break room flung open.
"We've got a ca- "Gibbs stopped talking when he took in the scene before him.
The simplest task I could give you! The one job I assign that should be quick and easy and you two manage to turn it into the complete opposite! The look Gibbs gave his agents said all of this and more.
Kate scrambled to her feet quickly and Tony followed suit, nearly slipping on the soapy floor.
"I- uh- sorry Gibbs."
"We'll clean it all up Boss."
"I know you will DiNozzo. But not now. We have a case."
A few office staff came wandering into the room and stopped when they saw the mess.
"Don't worry ladies, DiNozzo and Kate here are going to clean the entire room later. They're feeling so generous that you can leave your dishes anywhere and don't worry about making a mess. They'll handle it."
Gibbs turned to walk out and Kate and Tony followed him glumly.
Straightening their clothes and grabbing their gear, they headed to the elevator.
"So where are you taking me for dinner tonight, Tony?"
"Is that a suggestion of a date Katie?" Tony grinned widely at her. "You hear that Boss? Katie's asking me on a date."
"I was not! You promised to buy me dinner! You promised to stop calling me Katie! DiNozzo you bastard!"
"Now, now Katie, I don't recall ever promising anything… But I will take you up on that date offer," he winked.
"You –"
"Just keep it out of the office," Gibbs growled as he moved to press the elevator button.
"Hey Boss, nice nail polish."
