Apologies, Sirius...
Snape's muse.
Set after a fight between Sirius and Severus.
No. Set after every fight they ever had...
Do you think it matters to me that I'm the one left bleeding?
You don't understand that I like what you do. That I need your anger; need your foolish arrogance and desperate words. Your violence saves me, binds me to your fingers, to a tangible reality, away from all that is lost.
I control you, cruelty. I compel you to feed on me. I am a compulsion you cannot defy; do not care to fight; cannot stake yourself against.
A word from me, well-placed, can have you on your knees in moments, albeit with a fist in my hair.
I draw secrets and revelations from your mind in yourspit; you show me sides and spots that the unbruised world cannot see through your armour.
And you don't know it. You place me in the ultimate control, in that you care enough to commit yourself to combat. I alone taste the insecurities in your knuckles, and on some level, no doubt perched atop my chest, you lose all self awareness and indulge your thirst.
You become primal. And you do so at my discretion.
In hating me, I make you hate yourself. We share a parallel par, and I sneer over it. At my behest you frighten your friends, and inspire greater enemies.
You bow to my will, and my will, twisted by nature, is nonetheless done. Is it not a little sacrifice on my part; so slight a physical destruction, to fill such a demanding inner void?
The price of power is absolute in worth. My helplessness in life tore you from your private path to rebuild my own, on which despair had overwhelmed me.
Your intervention became my redemption, yet I regret having used you so mercilessly. The only control I ever had over my life and body, was in determining the nature of its physical suffering. You indulge me unwittingly, and I have worshipped you for it.
My scars, every one, is a tribute to my struggle for control.
I'm sorry, Sirius-that one day the knowledge that I self-inflicted your hatred of me will hit you, and you will fall down. But for all your hatred, my dear, true enemy...I almost love you.
You once were mine
and I can't…
...I will never apologise enough.
End.I like this piece ;) please review?