If you're easily offended better run away now, because this is pretty vile. This is my tongue-in-cheek version of the originally-planned Gumdrops. Prepare to be horrified. Characters are not mine, and I have never made money from them.
"Hey, Greg."
"Yeah?"
"Scoot over. Grissom's in my room, so I'm bunking with you."
"Why's Grissom in your room?"
"He says you snore, he can't sleep."
"Oh. Okay."
"Greg."
"Yeah?"
"What are you doing?"
"Sara, if you have to ask either I'm doing it wrong or you're REALLY out of practice."
"Oh. Wow." Pause. "Oh, my."
"You figured it out, then."
"You really should stop."
"Do you want me to?"
"No. No, but you should."
"Why?"
"I don't know." LONG pause. "Oh, Greg. Don't you dare stop!"
"Wasn't... wasn't planning on it..."
Squeaka squeaka squeeeka squeeka squeeeeka bump bump bump bump bump...
"Oh oh Greg"
"Oh Sara"
Really long pause.
"Greg?"
"Yeah?"
"Where are you going?"
"Ummmm... nowhere."
"What's that in your hand?"
"Oh, nothing."
pad pad pad pad pad
scrrrreeeeeek
pad pad pad pad pad.
"Greg?"
"Yes, Sara?"
"Tell me you didn't just do what I think you did."
"What... what do you think I did?"
"Did you just hang a trophy condom from my door handle?"
"Actually, since you're in here I think it's Grissom's door handle now..."
"GREG!"