Someone Else's Dream

Tohru Honda.

Only Tohru could make shopping in a thrift store seem like she was having an exciting adventure. Haru sighed, wondering how he got talked into accompanying the riceball on a shopping excursion.

It wasn't as if he didn't like being with Tohru. Because he did. In fact, it was because of her that he had taken to spending more time at Shigure's home instead of his own. Before Tohru had come along, it had simply been a house. And now it was a home. And it felt really nice to be in a home. She was always warm and friendly. Smiling. Welcoming.

Sometimes, when he was certain that the others were not paying too close attention to him, he would even dream that it was his home. That she was welcoming him home.

She didn't think he was some stupid oaf, either. She didn't make fun of his rather questionable sense of direction. She didn't tease him about his clothes or his earrings or his hair. She didn't scold him when his dark side managed to break free. She didn't make him feel inferior. She made him feel like he actually counted.

In a world filled with anger and hatred, fear and repulsion, Tohru was goodness and joy. She was laughter when all others had forgotten how to laugh. She was a reminder that there was still light in this dark world.

No, it wasn't at all that he didn't like being with Tohru. It was just unusual that her overprotective protectors were leaving her in his care.

Okay, so maybe part of it had to do with the fact that Yuki was tied up with student council responsibilities and Kyo was training... that was beside the point. Oh okay, to be very honest, they thought that Momiji would be coming along as well. So what if they didn't know that he had already made plans to watch that new anime show with Kisa and Hiro. Was it his fault they didn't have all the facts?

Well... maybe it was. Hey, miscommunication happens.

"Why don't you let Shigure buy you a new dress?" asked Haru as Tohru continued to search through the racks of musty smelling clothes.

She looked up with startled brown eyes. "Oh no! I couldn't possibly ask such a thing!"

"Yuki and Kyo would be glad to chip in to buy you a new dress." Haru shrugged nonchalantly. "I wouldn't mind chipping in either."

Her smile was like sunshine. He could almost see flowers blooming around her and sparkles in the air. "You are too kind Hatsuharu-san."

"Haru."

Somehow her smile brightened. "Haru." Nervously she began to dig through the clothes once more. "But I could not ask for money for something as frivolous as a new dress that is just for a school dance."

"What about Ayame? He would love to make you a new dress for free."

Tohru's hands froze on the dress she was touching. Her eyes were full of worry as she looked at him. "I am so sorry," she apologized. "I did not think about how boring that shopping for a dress would be for you." She turned and clasped her hands in front of her. "Forgive me. I will be as quick as possible. If you would like, you can wait in the cafe next door. I think there is a game arcade across the street..."

Haru shook his head, a little disturbed by the apology. She was perilously close to tears. He hadn't meant to make her feel bad. Besides the fact that Kyo and Yuki would murder him if they found out that he had made her cry, the thought of him making her cry made him feel a little queasy.

Though that was something else he liked about her. She was compassionate. She wasn't quick to anger or to blame. If she was someone she cared about, she was just as fierce in her loyalty as any warrior.

"I just thought that you might want a new dress for the dance."

Tohru gave him a searching look. Obviously she felt he was telling her the truth, because she smiled at him warmly and went back to searching through the racks.

"Do you want to know a secret?" she asked shyly as she picked up a pale yellow dress.

A secret? Tohru Honda has secrets?

"Sure."

"This isn't regular shopping."

Haru cocked his head to the side. "Oh?"

"We are looking at someone else's dreams."

"Someone else's dreams?"

She nodded and held the yellow dress in front of her. "Perhaps this dress that was worn by a girl who was going to her very first ball." She set the yellow dress aside and picked up a dress with purple flowers. "This dress was worn by a girl who was auditioning for a play and won the title role." A pink dress was next. "This one was worn by a girl on her first day of college." She picked up a pale blue dress with white trim. "This dress," she announced, "Was worn by a girl when she got her very first kiss."

Haru smiled, knowing that she would have been embarrassed by her mention of a kiss if she had not been so wrapped up in the dreams she was imagining for each dress she found. And, as it turned out, she had quite the imagination. Every single dress was worn by a different girl at important moments in her life.

The ox followed her around the room, listening indulgently to the tales she wove for each garment. She told him the stories as if she were sharing secrets with him.

Maybe... maybe she was. Maybe these secrets, these dreams she created for the previous owners of these dresses were some of her own dreams. He wondered if she shared her dreams with the others. Did she feel it was selfish to voice her own dreams when the others had so few for themselves? It certainly seemed like a Tohru thing to do. Or had she pushed all her dreams into a corner when her mother died?

Haru leaned against the wall and watched as Tohru picked a few of the dresses to try on. He even handed her a few that he liked. The smiles and blushes he got in return made it worth the effort.

"Do you like this dress?" Tohru asked when she came out wearing the pale yellow dress.

"Yeah."

The dress reminded Haru of the ribbon Yuki had given her long ago. She still wore that ribbon. In fact, it was in her hair today.

Was Tohru Yuki's dream?

Yeah, the rat was protective of the riceball. Very fond of her, in fact. But did he love her? Really truly love her? Or was his love for her the love of one friend to another? Was it because she shared his secret of being under the zodiac curse? Was it because she was a female that he could actually touch without fear of the curse being discovered? Was it because she kept their house in order? That she was in essence their little housewife like Shigure often calls her.

"Should I buy this one?"

Haru shook his head. "You might want to try on more than one, Tohru."

She smiled. "You are right!" With a swirl of her skirts she turned and marched back into the dressing room like a soldier.

No. He was sure that Yuki cared for her more than just someone to clean his house and make his meals. Yuki could see Tohru's innate kindness. She made him happy. She pulled him out of the nightmare that was his life. Every time she smiled at the rat she was rescuing him from Akito.

No doubt about it, Tohru was Yuki's dream.

"Haru?"

Tohru's voice shook him out of his thoughts. She was peeking behind the curtain with pink cheeks. Haru waited as she struggled with some internal war with herself. Finally she opened the curtain and walked out.

The air whooshed out of his lungs. Suddenly he was awfully glad that he was made her escort today. The dress was beautiful, though much more close fitting that Tohru usually wore. In place of the girl he had grown to care about stood a woman. Okay, a blushing madly woman, but still a woman. When had Tohru grown? He scolded himself, he wasn't supposed to notice such things about her. The orangish red dress was almost the exact color of Kyo's hair.

"What do you think?"

It was safest not to talk about what he was actually thinking at the moment. So instead he said, "Nice, but you might want to try on some others too."

She nodded and turned back to the dressing room. No twirl of the skirt this time since this particular skirt couldn't twirl.

Was Tohru Kyo's dream?

Everyone knows that the cat is fiercely protective of the girl, but did that mean that he loved her? Real love. Man loves woman kind of love. Or did he just love her because she could see past the monster and into his soul? Was it because she always had such a fondness for the cat in the zodiac stories that her mother would tell her that drew him to her? Did he love her because she gave him comfort and compassion? Or did he love her because she gave him the one thing that no one else had ever been able to? Hope.

Yes. Haru was certain that Tohru was Kyo's dream.

The next dress that Tohru came out with made him smile. It also made her look several years younger. It was a cream colored flouncy dress with little blue ribbons. It reminded him of Momiji.

"Cute," he said.

Tohru gave a little twirl with a happy giggle. "It reminded me of Momiji."

He grinned lazily. "Me too." He tried to peer into the room. "Do you have more to try on?" He knew she did.

"Oh yes!"

Once she was out of sight he thought about Momiji. There was no doubting that the little rabbit loved and adored Tohru. Even had the blonde not been in the havit of telling him that every day how much he loved the girl, he still would have known just by the way his eyes sparkled whenever Tohru was near. There wasn't even a question that Tohru was Momiji's dream.

But which dream? Did he love her as a cherished friend? A confidant? Family? Or as a woman? The bubbly blue eyed blonde could fool the others that he was still a child, but he couldn't fool Haru. It was very likely that the rabbit loved Tohru in the romantical sense.

Haru sighed and folded his arms across his chest, glaring at the shopkeeper who kept looking at him suspiciously.

The thing about Tohru, he decided, was that she honestly loved every single one of them. Even him. But it was impossible to tell what kind of love she was in. In love or friendship love or family love? Would he even have a chance against the others? Yuki and Kyo lived with her and shared their lives with her on a daily basis. And Momiji was so enthusiastic about his love for her. Would a semi withdrawn navigationally challenged ox with a slight split personality problem have a hope in heck of competing for her love?

Did he even have the right?

A soft sound dug him out of his thoughts. Tohru was quietly trying to get his attention. He looked at her. She was wearing the blue dress he had handed to her.

The dress of the girl who got her first kiss.

"I think that's the one," he said softly as he stood up and walked around her. "Definitely the one."

Happily she smiled and went back into the changing room, promising him that she would cook him something special for dinner to make up for keeping him so long.

Haru smiled.

She was his dream too. And he had just as much of a right to dream of happiness as anyone else.