Jump City Talk!
By Strix Moonwing
Strix Moonwing: Hi! Here for my eighth story! This is a talk show hosted by me and my co-host StarfireK!
StarfireK: Strix does not own Teen Titans! If she did then the show would go up to PG-13 and there would be a lot of blood and fighting!
Strix: Uhhhhh StarK….that would be if YOU owned it!
StarK: Oh right…..
Episode 1: Talk with Robin
The scene shows a brightly lit studio filled with benches filled with and fans and people watching the show. There is a stage with a teenage girl behind a desk and another girl sitting on a big chair next to her. There are more chairs around the stage for guests. A big sign saying "Jump City Talk" lights up and the girl behind the desk smiles and stands up. (Applause is heard from)
The teenage girl waved to the fans and said, "Hello everyone! And welcome to the newest TV talk show…"
"Jump City Talk!" shouted the audience, clapping.
"I am your host Strix Moonwing! And my co-host…StarfireK!" cried Strix. StarfireK, who was in the chair, waved. "Okay StarK tell the audience what's now today's show!"
StarK got out a list and said, "Okay….first we interview Robin, take some phone calls, do the episode dare of the day and the quote of the day too, and then we do so commercials and roll the credits!"
Strix clapped her hands together. "Okay then we better get started! But before we start the show lets look at some commercials!"
The scene shows little Beast Boy in his old Doom Patrol mask sitting in a school desk with a history book in his hand. Negative man is dressed as a teacher and is trying to teach him history.
"Negative Man! This is boring! You've been trying to teach me about the American Revolution for an hour! And I still have no idea what you're talking about!" cried Beast Boy.
"Well if Mento would get some history books that weren't made BEFORE the American Revolution then maybe you can learn some of it!" said NM glaring at Mento.
"Who needs history books when you have cereal!" cried a voice calling from the ceiling. Beast Boy and Negative Man looked up.
"Uhhhhh…Larry? The ceiling is talking to us!" called Beast Boy with a wide scared eyes.
"I'm not the ceiling! I'mmmmm Flies with Raven!" shouted Flies with Raven(FR) appearing next to Negative Man.
"Uhhhhhh….what do you mean? How will cereal help us learn history?" Asked Beast Boy.
"Regular cereal can't! But History-Os can…." Said FR before NM cut her off.
"NO! Anything but that! Don't say it!" cried NM with wide scared eyes.
"You mean History-Os?" asked Beast Boy before a theme song that we all know and love came on.
Theme song: Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy…..History-Os!
"NOOOOOOOOOO! It's Raising Beast Boy Doom Patrol Style all over again!" cries NM curling up into a ball and sucking his thumb. The rest just stared at him.
"Wow…and I thought I was crazy!" said FR.
"Uhhhh….you are." Said Beast Boy.
"Oh yeah!" said Flies with Raven.
"Don't you have to finish the commercial?" asked Beast Boy.
"Oh yeah! History-Os now have little marshmallows shaped like George Washington, Napoleon, and Pearl Harbor! And for a limited time there are historical facts on the back! Warning: facts may not be that historically correct!"
"How can there be marshmallows shaped like Pearl Harbor?" asked Beast Boy.
"I don't know! I don't make the marshmallows!" said FR. Both of them looked at Larry.
"Maybe we should help him." Said Beast Boy.
"Well the best way to conquer your fear is to face it head on!" said FR.
"Soooo…we should take NM to where the theme song is made?"
"Right!" said FR as they grabbed Larry and pulled him away. As they left the theme came on to end the commercial.
"Oh History-Os! History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy….History-Os!
Buy them today!
Back to show….
"Hi! We're back and we're ready for our first guest!" said Strix from her desk. "You know him, you love him, he's the Boy Wonder! He's…….Robin!"
The audience applauds as Robin walks in and sits down on a chair waiting to speak.
"Welcome to Jump City Talk Robin!" said Strix.
"Oh should call you Robin, Rob, or Robby-poo?" asked StarK leaning over to Robin. Robin pushed his chair away from her.
"Uhhhhh…Robin is fine. Do I know you two? You look and sound familiar. Asked Robin raising an eyebrow.
Strix smiled and struck a noble pose. "I'm the host…Strix Moonwing! Famous fanfic authoress/shape-shifter/water powered/Leader of the Strix Struma Strikers! Look on my profile for more."
StarK jumped up next to Strix striking another noble pose next to her. "And I'm her co-host….StarfireK! Famous authoress/fire powered/best friend of Strix!"
Robin thought for a second. Then his eyes grew wide with fear. "Now I remember! You two were the ones who came into the tower to try and make a story about how to annoy us! You changed us all into puppets! And you covered the living room with mustard and ketchup! And if that isn't the worst…you dresses up like me and followed me around annoying me!"
Strix smiled. "Great! You do remember us! And it wasn't only us that turned you into puppets….SabreJustice helped! Right Sabre!" shouted Strix at the audience. A teenage boy stood up and waved.
"I remember! You still own me my gum back!" shouted Sabre, sitting back down again.
"Okay….someone get him some gum!" said StarK to a security guard, who gave Sabre ten packs of gum.
"Okay Robin…if you are done whining about the things that me and StarK have done to you I'd like get on with my interview." Said Strix. Then she looked up and glared. "Or I can show my attack moves I've learned from the Strix Struma Strikers, or from being a warrior in the Riverclan, or if that doesn't scare you I can get my bow and arrow from Redwall to show to you. It's up to you."
StarK leaned toward Robin. "If you want my advice I'd chose the bow and arrow…it'll give you time to run out the door!"
Robin gulped. "I'll shut up now!" Strix stopped glaring and smiled.
"Good! Now to begin the interview I….Oh look! We have a call from Slade in his lair about thousand feet underground. "Slade you're on the air." Slade voice filled the studio.
"I just what to say that you two shouldn't waste your time with Robin. He was always a whiner! And he complained nonstop!" said Slade.
Robin jumped up and shouted angrily at the phone. "I am not a whiner! And I had a right to complain!"
"Sure you did! All I wanted to do was make you my apprentice and show you how to fight better and get you a cooler costume!"
Robin's face fell. "What's wrong with my costume?"
StarK pushes Strix out of the way. "Have you noticed you look like a walking street light! I mean really…you must be a champion at playing red light, green light!"
Strix walks up to him and puts a hand on his shoulder. "Robin…I speak for everyone here when say you look like Christmas in July." Everyone gasped.
"As I was saying." Said Slade. "All I wanted to do was help you. But noooooo…you had to turn all noble. And be a complete baby about it!"
"You put bombs in my friends! Of course I complained!" shouted Robin.
"So! There are bombs in people all the time! They live normal lives!"
"In constant fear of blowing up!" shouted Robin.
Meanwhile while they were arguing, StarK and Strix had set up lawn chairs and were eating popcorn while moving their heads back and forth between Robin and Slade like at a tennis match.
"You know…if it helps the argument I know a man who lived for years with a knife in his stomach." Said Strix as StarK drank some soda.
"YOU KEEP OUT OF THIS!" shouted both Robin and Slade.
"Come on! Spongebob ate a pie bomb and he lived!" cried Slade.
"He didn't eat the pie! He kept it in his pocket! And how do you know that? Wait! Do you watch Spongebob?"
"The point is…these beautiful ladies have better things to do than listen to your whining!" shouted Slade.
StarK spit out her soda. "Beautiful ladies!" shouted StarK.
"Uhhhhhh….Slade…are you going somewhere with this conversation?" asked Strix raising her eyebrow.
"Actually I am. The real reason I called….besides to annoy Robin… was to ask you two to become my apprentices! What do you say?" said Slade.
"Uhhhhhhh…Oh look! Looks like you phone call is up! Looks like you have to go now! StarK turn off the phone!" said Strix nervously.
"Bye Slade!" shouted StarK. Then she used her fire powers to blow up the phone.
"Uhhhhh….StarK. I asked you to turn it off…not blow it up!" shouted Strix.
"Uhhhhhh…oops."
Strix hit her head over and over on her desk. "Someone please get us a new phone while we watch some commercials."
The scene shows a music studio and it shows Beast Boy and Flies with Raven carrying an unconscious Negative Man into it. They go to the front desk where a big fat guy with a tall white cowboy hat on is sitting at.
Beast Boy walks up. "Hi! I'm Beast Boy, Junior Doom Patrol member. This is my friend Flies with Raven. And the unconscious guy is Negative Man. NM has a phobia of the History-Os theme song. We're trying to help him conqueror it by making him face it head on. So may you show us where they record the theme song?"
"Why hello there little green fella! You too little missy! My name is Doug Dimmadome!" said the fat guy. (From the Fairy Oddparents)
"Doug Dimmadome!" shouted both FR and BB.
"Yes Doug Dimmadome! Owner of History-Os and the theme song to it!"
"I thought Strix Moonwing was the owner of History-Os and the theme song?" said FR.
"She was til I stole it from her. Now the theme song is made down the hall right over there." Said Doug pointing down the hallway. The guys left but then a teenage girl wearing a dark cloak came in.
"Hello there little missy! What can I do for you?" said Doug. The girl lifted her cloak and said, "You can give me back my cereal you thief!"
"Never Strix!" shouted Doug Dimmadome.
"Okay if you put it that way…" Strix turns into an owl and then a whole bunch of owls came in too.
"Strix Struma Strikers attack!"
The scene goes back to Beast Boy and Flies with Raven and NM. They reached the end of the hallway to a door. They open it to reveal the hit singer Chip Skylark (also from the Fairy Oddparents) singing the History-Os theme song!
"Hi little green dude! And little dudette! What can I do for you?" ask Chip.
"We need something to help Negative Man get over his fear of the theme song." Said Flies with Raven.
"I know just the thing! It's the new History-Os soundtrack!" shouted Chip.
"What's that?" asked both BB and FR.
"Take it away announcer dude!" shouted Chip. A big voice came on.
The new History-Os soundtrack contains over 20 songs all about the joy of History! And all by Chip Skylark! Some of the classics in it are the famous 'I want tea that way'(Like I want it that way by Backstreet Boys)…Tell me why ain't nothing like tea party! Tell me why is every thing a British mistake! I never want to hear you say…I want tea that way!...and famous hit "I ain't no Loyalist!"(Like I ain't no Hollaback Girl)…King George is bananas! B-a-n-a-n-a-s! He's bananas! B-a-n-a-n-a-s!..And last but not least the famous theme song "History-Os"…Oh History-Os! Oh History-Os! When you need to learn history where do you go! To the store to buy…History-Os!" All you can get all this for a low price of $19.99. All you need to do is call 1-800-History. Buy it today. Must be 18 or older to call.
"Cool! Let's buy it!" cried Beast Boy.
"Sorry none of you are eighteen! Or older!" said Chip.
"Why you little…" growled Flies with Raven moving toward Chip.
"AARRGGHHHH! Don't hurt me…Okay hurt me! But not my teeth! Help!"
Back to the Show…
"Okay! We're back with a new phone and ready to ask some questions!" said Strix. She turned to Robin. "So Robin introduce yourself to the audience."
"Okay I'm Robin! Leader of the Teen Titans, ex-sidekick of Batman, and Boy Wonder!" said Robin.
"I always wanted ask you this…why do they call the boy wonder?" asked StarK.
"Uhhhhhh…Because….I can do wonderful stuff? I think?" said Robin.
"So everybody wants to know…why did you leave Batman?" asked Strix. Everybody in the audience leaned toward Robin waiting to hear his answer.
"Well….I wanted to start my own solo act." Said Robin.
"That didn't last long did it?" retarded Strix.
"Are you sure you didn't just want to boss people around!" said StarK.
"Uhhhhhhhh…." Said Robin not sure how to reply.
"The apple never fall far from the tree." Said Strix. StarK and Robin looked at her with question marks on their heads.
"I mean Batman was a bossy millionaire and now Robin is a bossy…non millionaire!" said Strix.
"I am not bossy!" shouted Robin angrily.
"Then why are you leader of a group of teenagers who all have super powers and can beat you to a pulp with them and all you have is a stick and some sharp darts?" asked StarK.
"Uhhhhhh….because….I….um…er…have a cool hair do?" said Robin not able to think of a better answer.
"Okay what about we talk about your love life?" asked Strix. Everyone applauded at the suggestion.
"Oh look! We have a new caller! Hmmm….says no ID. Oh well! Caller you're on the air. The caller's voice was muffled so they couldn't tell who they were as it filled the room.
"Hi! I have a statement to make at Robin. I just what to say that I think that he should just ask Starfire out already! It's so oblivious they like eachother!"
"What! I do not! She's…er…just a friend!" shouted Robin.
"Yeah right! I mean really you can fight evil villains, crazy pyso-paths, giant monsters, but you can't ask one alien princess out on a date!" shouted the caller.
"Who the heck is this guy?" shouted Robin at Strix and StarK.
"Uhhhhh…Strix. It says on the computer the caller is coming from inside the studio…and is using our phone right here!" said StarK.
The three looked at the new phone and saw a wire connected to it and heading up stairs. They follow it upstairs and down the hallway into a proms room.
"Hey Strix! I don't remember this curtain ever being here!" shouted StarK. Strix pulled the curtains back to reveal Beast Boy and Cyborg huddled over a phone laughing as they said more stuff about Robin and Starfire. Then they notice Strix, StarK, and Robin glaring at them.
Cyborg laughed nervously. "Heehee…just a little joke right guys! No harm done right?"
"You two are dead!" shouted Robin as he lunged at them. They screamed and ran off with Robin right behind them.
"Okay StarK is going to do the quote of the day then to end the show we're going to do the dare of the day!" shouted Strix as she ran to save Cyborg and Beast Boy.
The scene shows a colorful room and StarK sitting on a stool in the middle of it. A big voice fills the room along with calming music like at a yoga section are something.
Voice: Here is StarfireK with the quote of the day…
"The quote of the day is….life isn't fair, it's fairer than death, but that's it!" said StarK.
Voice: Now you have heard the quote of the day by StarfireK.
Back to the show…
"Okay guys…the show is almost done and you know what that means!" shouted Strix.
"The Dare of the Day!" shouted the audience.
"Strix we have a caller for the dare of the day!" shouted StarK.
"Put her on the air!" Shouted Strix. Flies with Raven's voice came on the air.
"This dare is for Robin…I dare Robin to…..ride the catapult of doom!" said Flies with Raven.
"The catapult of doom! What's that?" cried Robin fearfully.
"We'll show you." Said StarK as she and Strix led him outside. They went to the roof of the studio where there was a little toy catapult on a table.
"That it! That's the catapult of doom!" said Robin in disbelief.
"No silly! That's a model of the catapult of Doom! We're just showing you what it does!" said Strix as they walked to the table. Strix picked up a Barbie doll with a picture of Robin's face pasted on the head.
"Okay…this is you. You with a helmet on(puts helmet on Barbie doll Robin) and you go into the catapult." Said Strix as she puts Barbie Robin into the catapult.
"Why do I have to be a girl Barbie! Why can my character be Ken!" whined Robin.
"Because we used Ken to be Beast Boy!" said StarK holding a Ken doll painted green and with Beast Boy's face pasted on the head. "He has the net waiting to catch you."
"Okay and here's me and StarK. (Show two super model Barbies with StarK and Strix's faces on them.) StarK here has calculated where you are going to land and has set Beast Boy there with a net. Then I cut the net with you in it." Said Strix giving her Barbie a pair of tiny scissors and making it cut the rope. It sent Barbie Robin flying up in the air, but it hit the jets of a passing airplane making it explode and sending it flying back to earth.
"Don't worry! The parachute will open before it hits the ground!" said Strix. The Robin doll hit Robin on the head and the parachute opened on Robin face.
"Okay ready to do the real thing!" shouted Strix smiling. All the color had left Robin's face.
"Is there any way to get out of this?" asked Robin.
"Nope!" shouted StarK, slamming a helmet on Robin's head and putting him on the real catapult of doom.
"Are you sure this is safe?" shouted Robin terrified.
"Don't worry! StarK has calculated where you are going to land and we made Beast Boy put a net there." Said Strix smiling.
In the outback of Australia…
Beast Boy has set up a giant net in the desert there and was now a green kangaroo and was talking to another kangaroo.
"So there really is a baby in there? Cool!" Said Beast Boy talking to a mother kangaroo. A baby joey(a baby kangaroo) pops out of the mother's pouch.
"Yay!" shouted Beast Boy in joy.
Back to the studio roof…
"Okay ready Robin?" shouted Strix getting the scissors ready to cut the rope.
"No!" shouted Robin.
"Good! Cut it Strix!" shouted StarK. Strix cut it and sent Robin flying.
"AAAAARRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!HELPPPPP!" shouted Robin as he flew away.
In Australia…
"Hello little baby kangaroo!" cooed Beast Boy to the baby joey. Suddenly a screaming Robin is heard flying near. He lands head first into the ground two feet from where the net was set.
"Awwwwww….soooo close. Hey do have an aspirin in there? Don't worry Robin kangaroos are magical! They have everything in that pouch!" said Beast Boy to the unconscious Robin.
Back at the studio…
"Okay guys! That's all the time we have for today's show!" Shouted Strix.
"Well me and Strix have to go and change our names before Robin sues! Good night everyone!"
"Come back for the next show where we interview Cyborg!" shouted Strix as she and StarK waved good bye to the audience as the credits roll.
Strix: Yay! Done with the first episode! I if you what to be a caller or suggest a dare on the show please say so in a review!
StarK: Review!