OMFG KAOS

Created by hoogiman and tikitikirevenge, in order of unimportance.

Disclaimer: The Board of Disagreement agrees about disagreeing anything that can be disagreed and/or agreed. In this case, then the agreement will be double-disagreed, therefore making it a double negative disagreement, therefore making it an agreement; so on, so forth. So our strategy is to triple-agree disagree agree which will equal to a disagreement, therefore accomplishing nothing.

And also, we don't own these characters. KAOS!

CHAPTER VEE

"We need a mop!" shouted Link. "Otherwise we can't clean up all the dead bodies!"

The Smashers all went to the dining room. They all looked around, but they couldn't find a mop.

"Wait, why would there be a mop in the dining room?" asked Nana.

"Good point," said Samus. "Actually, I think I used it to wipe up a huge pile of human remains earlier today. In the kitchen."

"As in, before people started dying?" said Link. "But how?"

"Uh…" said Samus, "where could that mop have gone?"

The Smashers went to the kitchen. Kirby's flattened body was still lying there.

"Let's look around," said Link.

And they did. They checked the door, the little corner behind the door, the space in front of the door, inside the fridge, the floor, the kitchen sink, the juice blender, the broken remains of the popcorn machine, and the inside of Kirby's body just in case.

But no luck.

"No idea where the mop is," said Captain Falcon. "Maybe it's stuck to the ceiling."

"That's a stupid idea," said Link.

"But it could be," said Captain Falcon.

"Why would the mop be stuck to the ceiling, Captain Loser?" said Link.

"Oooh, insult," said Captain Falcon. "Er… perhaps it's because it's a really pointy, sharp mop, and it got stuck?"

"Captain Falcon," said Link, "the mop is not as pointy as a sword, and it is certainly not embedded in the ceiling. There's no need to look up."

"Do-a we even have a mop?" said Mario.

The mop fell from the ceiling and poked its way through the top of Mario's head, driving all the way down to the ground, so it looked like Mario was wearing a mop-like wig. The fridge then exploded, showering Mario's body with bits of pumpkin.

"See?" said Captain Falcon.

"Okay," said Link, "there's the mop."

"Huh," said Master Hand, who was watching from his live TV studio. "It looks as if they found that mop already. Wasn't my hiding place clever?"

"Indeed," said his programming executive, Medusa.

"I thought it was a nice touch to stick it up there with our sponsors' bubble gum," added Master Hand.

"Very clever," said Medusa.

"Who's Medusa?" said some random guy who was just asking for an infodump.

Ness' ghost floated up, saying, "Oh, Medusa is just the villain from Kid Icarus."

"Why is she in this story?" said the random guy.

"Because it shows how in touch everyone is, having Kid Icarus characters in the story, because PIT IS THE NEWEST SMASH BROTHER BUT HOW WILL HE COPE," said Ness.

"Ah," said the random guy. "Hey… how can you talk if you're dead?"

"Oh," said Ness, in a nerd voice, "in the game Earthbound, I got to float around a bit once I died but my friends were alive."

"Hey, Hoogi," said Tiki, "we've just included references to two games with cult followings! Now we've got to get lots of reviews!"

"Yay for fangirls!1" replied Hoogiman.

"WTF?" said the random guy.

"Fourth wall," said Ness. "You wouldn't understand." He disappeared forever.

"Let's try and escape!" said Marth to Roy, sneaking off from the group.

"'kay," replied Roy, "But how will we escape?"

"With these conveniently placed escape tools!" replied Marth.

Nothing happened.

"I said, with these conveniently placed escape tools!" replied Marth.

Some conveniently placed escape tools appeared.

"Yay!" said Roy.

"Let's try and escape from the fifth storey!" said Marth.

"Fifth storey, more like, fourth storey!" said Roy, wittily.

Laugh track.

"Fifth storey, more like, third storey!" said Roy.

Laugh track.

"Fifth storey, more like, second storey!" said Roy.

Laugh track.

"Fifth storey, more like, ground storey!" said Roy.

No one laughed.

"Maybe the joke was getting a bit old," said Marth.

"Okay, let's escape from the fifth storey!"

They ran up to the fifth storey.

"Here is a window!" said Roy.

…

…

"Where we can escape from!" said Roy.

"Aah!" said Marth, understandingly, "Now I understand!"

"How do we escape?" asked Roy.

"How about, we put wet objects into the unsafe power sockets? That should work and not lead to the fateful death of one of us!" replied Marth.

Marth did.

Marth died due to electrocution.

"AAAH!" screamed Marth.

Roy looked, shocked.

"At least I have these conveniently placed escape tools!" said Roy.
They disappeared.

"Aww," said Roy.

They appeared again.

"Yay!" said Roy.

…just out of Roy's reach.

"Aww," said Roy.

Roy used a chair to get them.

"Drat," said the man who controls gravity.

"Now I can escape!" said Roy.

Roy used a very heavy object to break open the window.

"Yay!" said Roy, "Now I can escape!"

Roy jumped out.

And died.

"Now I remember," said Roy, saying his last words, "This side of the house was over a cliff."

Roy fell off the cliff.

Roy died.

The window resealed itself somehow.

"All right," said Link, "let's start mopping!"

"But I want to go insane!" whined Nana.

"Well, you're not allowed to," said Link.

"Seriously," said Nana, "I was having a lot more fun when we were all rioting."

"Nana…" said Popo, tugging at Nana's arm.

"Hey!" said Link. "Whatever happens, we must not be violent!"

"Uh, okay," said Nana. "All I wanted was just to kill a person or two."

"This conversation isn't contributing anything," added Popo.

Popo didn't die.

"Phew," said Popo.

The chapter died.

Time since lockdown: 15 minutes.

Deaths: Luigi (shotgun), Young Link (spork), Kirby (mob), Ness (freaking sword through stomach), Falco (chocking on projectile vomit), Peach (a death to horrific (and funny) to be read by mortal eyes), Mario (impaled by mop), Marth (electrocuted), Roy (falling off a cliff, indoors)

Note: Hoogiman and tikitikirevenge co-authored this chapter. Can you tell who wrote which parts? (Hint: Hoogiman was really lazy and only wrote the Marth and Roy bit. Can you work it out from that?)

Also, visit hoogi(dot)brickfilms(dot)com/forum and waste our precious bandwidth!