Today was like hell, because it WAS HELL! An Imp known as Imp was walking around randomly, because he was retarded and didn't have a car.

THONK!

"Wtf?" said Imp, who just got hit in the face with some object, he looked down and saw the object. It was a BOX! "Pancakes!" shouted Imp, who ate the box even though it was steel and stuff. "Yum yum!" Imp said "I wish I had another!"

BONK!

Imp got hit in the face again, but to his dismay, it was a torso armor. "Aw!" said Imp "now where will I eat?"

SCONK!

Then suddenly, a chainsaw hit Imp in the groin, blade first. But Imp didn't have a penis anyway, so he walked along merrily to tell his friends.

-

"Noble Mastermind, it seems we have reports of many objects appearing out of nowhere" said a pink demon called Pinky, because he was a fag (WHICH THEY ROT IN HELL CUZ THEIR A SIN AGAINST GOD!11!one!). "Hmm…." said a really big and ugly demon brain thingy "it seems that the humans have found a way to enter our world non-spirtualy." "So what should we do?" said a Baron of Hell, who wasn't really a baron but more like a mistress or something.

The brain demon thought and thought, and then got hit in the head by a box. "SATAN BLESSIT!" screamed the demon "THAT FUCKING HURT!" Out of somewhere, came a Hell Knight, who had lots of skin ripped off yet looked pretty damn powerful. "I know what we should do" it said "we should give those mortals their own medicine." "That sounds fucking stupid!" squealed a Cacodemon, who soon got owned by the Hell Knight.

-

"Hey Doctor Cumfucker!" said a scientist who was busy watching some violent Mario flash at "can we throw another thing in the portal?" "For the last time, my name is Doctor Fumcucker!" shouted another scientist "and sure, go throw something else in!"

The first scientist giggled like the dumbass he is and activated the portal. He walked in front of the portal, then unzipped his pants. A stream of urine came out of his wiener as he giggled as if he was on crack. But out of the portal appeared a Lost Soul, angered as piss covered its flaming skull. With one bite it tore of the guy's tiny cock, blood and sperm coming out of the wound. "AHHHHHHH!" screamed the scientist as he was attacked by more Lost Souls. "Holy shit! What are those things?" said Dr. Cumfucker- I mean Fumcucker. An Imp threw a fireball at his face, burning his face off.

"Well I must say" said the Mastermind, now walking on robot armed with a chain gun "this is quite an idea." The demon smirked, firing his new BFG 9000 arm at some machinery.

-

The moral of the story is don't litter in a portal that leads to Hell!

DA END!