Title: Just Jack

Author: Kate McCaye

Rating: K

Category: Humor

Setting: Season 9, anytime during or after Beachhead

Summary: Bored at the Pentagon, Jack misses the rest of the gang, then gets a call from someone who misses him too. Hints at S/J consistent with the show's hints.

A/N: This one is pretty weird. It's also very short and has no point, other than to make you chuckle a little. I'll just keep dipping into my folder of not-so-good stories until the objections become louder than the requests to keep it up;). I couldn't think of a title either, and Will and Grace is on as I post this, so... enjoy. This one's more old-school, like my earliest ones. It's sort of similar to "The Walls Have Ears," I suppose.

Just Jack

Major General Jack O'Neill swallowed down some aspirin with the dregs of coffee at the bottom of his mug. Wincing at the unpleasant flavor, he set the coffee mug down on top of the file he had just completed as though it had mortally offended him.

You'd think the Pentagon, with its vast resources, would be able to make decent coffee. You'd be wrong. Then again, it was possible Jack had just got way too used to Daniel's super-strength coffee over the years, so anything else seemed watery and gross. Either way, "no decent coffee" was Number 12 on the list of things he hated about his new job.

His grumpier-than-usual mood was lifted by the coffee mug itself as he leaned back in his chair and studied it. It was a simple enough mug, just plain white. On the side of it, in black block letters, it said, "THE MAN." It was a gift from SG-1 when he had been promoted to Brigadier General over a year ago, sort of an inside joke between them after he told them he didn't think he could go from "sticking it to the man" to "being the man."

While the team had presented him with the mug, along with a big delicious cake, lots of beer, a stress ball, and an ergonomic pen for all the paperwork he'd have to sign, so the gift was technically from all of them, he certainly knew them well enough to know whose idea the mug had been. Only Carter's sense of humor would have thought of that.

Jack was fairly certain the pen had been Daniel's idea, and the stress ball had Teal'c written all over it. Not literally of course. Actually, just last week Jack had doodled a picture of the shrub trying to cut the budget of the SGC on one side of the squishy balloon-like ball with a Sharpie. He liked to think it gave him the incentive to squeeze it that much harder.

Regardless, looking at the mug reminded him fondly of his team, which brought a small smile to his face and made the painfully bunched muscles of his shoulders relax just a bit. Or… maybe the aspirin was starting to work. But he was pretty sure it was his team… especially his coffee-mug-giving former 2IC, with whom he had engaged in a truly juvenile phone debate about who missed whom the most, just last night. The conversation had been ended shortly after he overheard Cassie making loud vomiting noises in the background.

He glanced at his desk calendar, his eyes automatically going to the next weekend block with a happy face drawn on it. Three more days… and he still had to finish his weight in paperwork first. He scooted back up to his desk and got back to work resignedly.

The phone rang a few minutes later, and he snatched it up when he saw on the display that it was from the SGC, setting his pen down and resting his chin in his hand as he set the phone to his ear. "O'Neill."

"Hi, sir. I hope this isn't a bad time…"

"It's never a bad time for you. What's up?"

There was a heavy sigh on the other end of the phone, and Jack knew it was going to be one of those conversations.

"I miss you, sir."

"Seems I'm a popular fellow."

"It's just not the same here anymore. Everyone misses you, but it's especially hard for me considering the… unique relationship we developed over the last year."

"Yeah. I miss you too, there's nobody here remotely as good as you."

"Likewise, sir. Now that we're thousands of miles apart I'm not afraid to admit this, but… well, I wasn't exactly the most positive voice in the room when your promotion was announced…"

"I seem to remember that being the case. Although I don't blame you. Hammond was the best."

"Maybe, sir, but… well, working for General Landry has really made me respect you on an even higher level…"

"I've heard that absence makes the heart grow fonder. And you know, the grass is always cleaner…"

"Greener."

"That was a joke."

"Right. Good one. Sorry, sir."

"Look, I picked Landry myself. He's a good man."

"I know he is, but… it's just not the same. He's not doing as good a job as you did and he has no interpersonal skills. Nobody can relate to him at all, not even his own daughter…"

"Give the man a fair chance to settle in. He's been overwhelmed with a huge problem just after taking over command. Be patient."

"Yes, sir."

"You know, you can ease up on the 'sir' stuff even though we're both supposed to be on duty right now."

"Habit, sir, nothing I can do about it. Look, I know you're really busy, but I just wanted to… to tell you how much I enjoyed serving under you. And… that I'd jump at the chance to do it again."

Jack couldn't help but smirk at that. It sounded so dirty… even though he was fairly certain that wasn't how it was intended. Maybe he just had a dirty mind. Or he had been by himself in DC waaaaaaaay too long.

"Well…" he finally answered in a practiced neutral tone. "We might be able to make some sort of arrangement that we could all be happy with. Although according to Landry you're indispensable so I don't think he's going to be willing to let you go very easily. And… I can't say I disagree with his opinion of you so I don't want to make any promises…"

"Oh crap, the General's back from the commissary. I gotta go."

The connection was hastily terminated. Jack stared at the phone in his hand for a few moments and shook his head. How had he garnered such devotion, with all he had put the guy through last year? Hank must be having even more fun with the little guy than Jack had. Even though he was speaking to a dial tone now, he said, "Goodbye, Walter" as he hung up the phone.

The end.

A/N: Anybody guess who was on the phone, or did you think it was somebody else?