Disclaimer: Yu Yu Hakusho and all related characters are the property of Togashi and all related parties. I have temporarily abducted them for my own enjoyment and will return them kicking and screaming once I'm done.

Notes/Warnings: Yuusuke/Kurama, reference to other pairings. Yuusuke asks a question he should have known he wouldn't want the answer to. PG-13.



The Perils of Idle Conversation

Yuusuke stretched his arms above his head, squirming slightly on the hard temple floor. "Ne, Kurama. Ever think about a threesome?"

He couldn't see his lover, but he could picture the look on his face. "Yuusuke," the youko said, amusement dancing along each word. "I've been in more threesomes than you've had time to think about."

Yuusuke rolled onto his side and grinned, eyes unashamedly scouring the redhead from head to foot. Kurama was kneeling at the table, a cup of something steaming hot cradled in his hands, and he was smiling with the same fond amusement that graced his features whenever he thought Yuusuke was being naively cute. It used to annoy the mazoku, until he figured out that Kurama was really, really easy to seduce when he was amused. "With anyone I know?" he asked, arching a brow.

Kuwabara, sitting sideways across the table, one elbow propping himself up, while he drank deeply from a coffee mug held in the other, gave them both a warning glance. "At this time, I'd like to remind you both of my all-purpose disclaimer."

Yuusuke grinned against his arm. "'I'm as open-minded as the next guy'," he quoted in a sing-song voice, "'but if Hiei's name enters any conversation involving sex, events leading up to sex, events immediately following sex, or events that could be misheard as relating to sex, I reserve the right to rip your tongue out of your head and feed it to my cat.'"

Kuwabara raised the mug to his lips. "I'm just saying."

"I assure you," Kurama said. "I've never had sex with Hiei."

"Technically," Yuusuke pointed out, "you just violated the terms. Now Kuwabara has to rip your tongue out."

Kuwabara grunted. "I'll let it slide since it was in the negative."

Kurama grinned wickedly over the top of his cup. "Yet."

"Goddamnit, Kurama! Stop that!"

Yuusuke laughed. "Was that a hint? Wanna get Hiei in for a little threesome action? Demon on demon on demon?"

Kuwabara shuddered elaborately. "I am not listening to this."

"Sadly, I doubt he'd be interested in such an... experiment," Kurama said thoughtfully. "Hiei isn't much for... group activities, as I'm sure you've noticed."

Kuwabara set aside his 'no Hiei sex' rule long enough to get a laugh in at his nemesis' expense.

"So who then?" Yuusuke pursued. "No Hiei, okay. It's not Karasu, is it?" he demanded, unable to stop himself from grimacing. "I mean, you were never that hard up, right?"

The youko laughed quietly, and Kuwabara threw his empty coffee mug at Yuusuke's head. "Be a little more of an asshole, Urameshi," he snarled.

"All right, all right! Sorry!" Yuusuke rubbed his head and glared, but couldn't help feeling a little abashed. Bad past. Right. "All right. Yomi!"

Kurama sipped his drink.

"Well?" Yuusuke demanded.

Kurama smiled.

"Hah! I knew it! Man, I'm never going to be able to look at that bastard again without smirking."

"Try not to start an international incident," Kuwabara advised dryly.

"Demon sex war!" Yuusuke cheered, just to watch the blood drain from Kuwabara's face. It worked.

"You have issues, you freak. Geez." Kuwabara shuddered.

"The discussion of my past encounters is certainly fascinating," Kurama said dryly. "But I can't help but feel it's somewhat unnecessary. Perhaps a change of topic?"

"Yes," Kuwabara said with feeling.

"Fine. che." Yuusuke propped himself up on both arms. "So who do you want to have a threesome with in the future?"

Kuwabara groaned and rubbed a hand over his eyes. "I'm going to get more coffee." He pushed himself up from the table, and stalked out of the room, grumbling under his breath about demons and unspeakable appetites.

Yuusuke grinned sheepishly. "Oops."

Kurama set his cup down carefully, and smiled slowly. "It's just as well. Gives us time to plot our move."

"eh?" Yuusuke blinked at him.

The fox demon smiled slowly, suggestively. "You did ask. And he's very good at teamwork."

Slowly, Yuusuke started to grin.


c&c always appreciated!