Apr 4, 2006

A/N: First off, I suppose the first thing I should do is apologize. Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorry. I'm entirely sorry for not posting sooner, and I suppose all my readers have given up on me by now. As I stated in my profile, I have been working on this recently, but somehow I cant seem to figure out the same style I had before. I wrote this chapter, tweaked it millions of times, but I'm still not satisfied. So you'll have to forgive me if it's gotten less comical and more…emotional. Guess I just can't keep the humor up.

I'm so angry at myself, I was looking forward to writing this chapter. And then school reared its ugly head, and here I am, three months later than when I was supposed to post, stuck with a chapter that I abhor.

Go me.

Anyways, you'll notice after a while that this chapter is strange. And you'll probably begin to worry for my sanity, but don't worry. It'll all make sense at the end, or so I hope.

---

Chapter 5—The...Well, Nothing.

Oh god oh god oh god. Someone find me a hole to go crawl into. Right now.

I can't believe I actually felt happy when I woke up this morning. Like nothing could touch me, you know? Like the world was one giant marshmallow and I had all the time in the universe to devour it.

Then someone—and I wont say who, but I'm sure it's obvious—came and dumped a big steaming bucket of foulness on it. And if you've ever possessed a giant marshmallow, or a little one, for that matter, you'd know how very disgusting they get when wet.

So now, thanks to that steaming bucket of foulness dumper, I am currently laying in the hospital wing instead of upstairs in my nice, warm, bed. Did I mention these sheets feel like they've been drooled over by a very sick ogre then washed with oil? And last time I checked, that was a bad thing.

I didn't like marshmallows anyway.

---

I crawled out of bed this morning fingering the necklace James had given me last night. He really wasn't a bad guy, that Potter, just a little…er, a lot confident. Maybe that wasn't such a bad thing.

I mean, sure, cocky gets a little annoying, but at least he's…he's…at least he's…Well, I'd have to say that…at least he's human. That's a perfectly good judgment, that is. Seriously, I should be glad he's a human, who'd want to be stuck with a monkey for a boyfriend? Or…a platypus?

Wait…Did I just say "boyfriend"? I meant acquaintance. Never a boyfriend, because that would mean that I like him and I don't and I don't want to…which is good because I don't, and…Ahem. Human.

Humans are good. A whole lot better than monkeys and platypuses, and eggs. I mean, who invented the concept of 'egg' anyway? A spongy yellow ball of…egg, surrounded by clear sticky…egg. I swear, one day I'll find the inventor of "egg" and give him a piece of my mind.

I was stumbling around pondering the human-ness of James Potter and the ridiculousness of "egg" when I found myself staring at the Head Dorm door. Now, this, in itself wasn't at all a strange phenomenon. I often find myself staring at doors. Yep, that's me, super door starer-atter. And did you know? From experience I've learned that if you reach out and turn that little round thing on the door and pull just a little bit, it will open. Woah.

Note to self: Sarcasm is only effective when you can use it properly, and…what was I saying? That staring at doors isn't a strange phenomenon.

No, what made this a strange phenomenon was the fact that there was a note tacked to the door that bore the words, in bold red ink, "READ ME!"

I rolled my eyes. No crap I was going to read it. I mean, what kind of a git goes around seeing notes tacked on doors and doesn't read them? Hmm, I see a note on the door, clearly meant for me…let's not read it, shall we? What, do I live in a world of idiots? Good grief.

Another (revised) note to self: Sarcasm…not your forte.

I pried the piece of parchment off the door (yes, pried. It was stuck on there pretty tight.) and lifted it to my eyes. Remembering the fiasco I had two days ago when I decided to read a letter backwards, I decided not to repeat my mistake. Kudos to Lily.

Lily,

Something came up. Don't ask, but please please PLEASE do not do not do not leave the room until I get back. I would've locked the door but you could probably break whatever charm I set.

--James

Hmm. Now this was interesting. First off, has that boy ever been taught not to overdo things? Seriously. "Please please please, do not do not do not." Talk about repetition. Jeeze.

Second off, there was no way no way no way I, Lily Evans Evans Evans, would agree to being confined in a room until Gods know when, waiting for some git to show up. I'm a growing teenager! I need my nourishment. And, come on, would it hurt to provide a reason?

Third off, he's damn right I'd break whatever charm he'd set. What kind of idiot did he take me for?

I crumpled the paper up in my fist, tossed it into the waste basket, and headed down to breakfast.

---

The entrance hall was delightfully uncrowded, and I enjoyed the silence that resulted from the absence of hundreds of feet viciously pounding along, grinding my sanity into the mud. The four giant hourglasses stood importantly by the entrance. Gryffindor was in the lead of course, though I'm sure we would have a considerably higher point total if it weren't for a certain four boys whose names I'll refrain from mentioning lest I work myself into such a temper that I actually go off in search of said boys so that I could pound their faces into the mud dammit!

Pondering the many cruel and unusual deaths I could deal Potter, Black, and their cronies (and thoroughly enjoying every moment of it), I stepped into the Great Hall, brushing past a very disgruntled looking Severus Snape on the way in.

I made my way to my usual seat, grabbed my usual bowl of cereal, smiled my usual it's good to be alive smile, and began to eat. As I did so, my eyes traveled around the Hall, alighting on the sparse number of students actually remaining at Hogwarts. Potter wasn't to be seen, and neither were any of his friends. Strange.

Ah well, they were probably off setting a toilet on fire, or something ridiculous like that. I found myself hoping that they'd accidentally set their heads on fire. And that I'd be standing by with a camera when they ran by, burning hair and all.

My eyes stopped on Snape, who was hunched over his bowl of Gods know what, his eyebrows drawn together in a frown, munching forlornly. He probably had no where else to go for the holidays but stay here at school, poor guy. He probably had this abusive father and this drunkard mother who could care less about him. No wonder he's always angry looking. He's just misunderstood, is all.

And that James, always picking on poor Severus, didn't he have an ounce of compassion at all? Was he that cold? Piece of garbage.

I angrily stabbed into my bowl with my spoon, not realizing that it had held a piece of toast. Oops. Cursing under my breath, I was hunting for that now probably soggy toast morsel in my bowl when who should show up but Potter.

Have I mentioned how great his timing is? Because it's just perfect. Here I was, poking a spoon through my cereal bowl, ranting about the stupidity of toast, when James arrives. I really do hate that boy. Would it kill him to let me hunt my toast in peace?

What if it were a life and death situation, did he ever think of that? What if finding that piece of toast was the deciding factor between my life and my death? And just when I'm on the verge of discovery, just when all that's standing between me and glory is one millimeter of cold milk…he shows up. Great, just great.

"Lily!" Potter shrieked—and yes, I am quite aware that I just used the word "shrieked" to describe James Potter's vocal movements. Just one note higher and it would be a screech.

I sighed and tried to push my bowl away so as to leave, but he was too fast. Damn those super seeker skills of his. Why doesn't he go…oh I don't know, chase a butterfly off a cliff or something?

"Lily," he cried again, softer this time, but just as frantically, as he all but collided onto the seat, tipping forward with the force of his momentum. I extended my arms and pushed at his chest until he had regained his uprightness again.

"Lily!"

Really now, not only was this getting redundant, but I knew perfectly well that my name was Lily, and not…Beth or something (thank the gods). Why did he think he had to continuously point it out?

Well, two could play at that game. I crossed my arms, looked him directly in the eye, and imagined at large, stupid troll where Potter now sat. It wasn't particularly hard.

"James," I said.

"Yes, Lily, I—"

"James."

He blinked. "What?"

"James." I grinned at his stupefied expression. This was quite fun.

"What?" he inquired again, dumbfounded.

"That is your name, isn't it? James."

"Yes, Lily, that's my name. Listen—"

"Good," I replied, cutting him once more. "And don't you forget it." I turned back to my soggy bowl of oats conclusively, hiding a smirk.

James actually growled in frustration. Wow, I was getting good at this. I snuck a look at the Slytherin table to see if Severus had taken note of the extremely loud disturbance caused by James earlier. He had. I grinned at him.

"Dammit Lily, listen to me," James was saying angrily, and I reluctantly looked back to him. "Didn't you get my note?"

He meant the note currently lying at the bottom of my waste basket, covered in layers of banana peels and sweet wrappers. The note that was not only incredibly insulting, but also incredibly unfounded.

I smiled sweetly. "What note?"

He cursed and ran a hand through his hair angrily. "I thought for sure you'd see it," he replied angrily."

"Really James," I remarked as casually as I could, "did you really expect me to stay cooped up in the dorm all day, blowing spit bubbles and twiddling my thumbs?"

"You did get it!" he cried in a jubilant tone, "Why didn't' you do as I said?"

I sighed at this surprising show of thickness and repeated myself. "Did you actually expect me to stay cooped up in the dorm all day, blowing spit bubbles and twiddling my thumbs?"

I supposed here I should admit something: I actually find twiddling my thumbs quite fun. And though I've never tried it, I'd imagine blowing spit bubbles to be an interesting past time, if more than a little…disgusting. Good to keep in mind for the next rainy day.

"I told you, something came up. Remus, he—well, er…we had something we had to…take care of."

By this time I was thoroughly tired of this topic. I couldn't care less if Remus was currently being attacked my rabid emus. Well, actually, I would be very unsettled if that were the case, but for the sake of the argument, let's just pretend I don't care. Shrugging, I glanced over at the Slytherin table again. Snape had packed his bags and was leaving the hall, and I rose myself, thinking to have a chat with him. He looked lonely.

James rose as well, grabbing my arm. "Come with me Lily," he said, and made to drag me away.

Remembering the day before (in which James spent at least half the day punishing my bruises by dragging me around all of England), I glared at him and pushed his arm away, striding out into the entrance hall in what I hoped was a dignified manner. I could hear Potter's footsteps following me, his voice calling my name (again!) and I spun around, exasperated. "Leave me alone, Potter," I growled, trying to sound as menacing as I could. I left him standing there, looking stunned at my animosity, and plodded onwards.

---

"Severus!" I called as soon as the boy was within earshot, and he stopped, looked at me, then turned about as if he expected there to be another Severus in close proximity, to whom I was shouting.

I closed the distance between us, and gave him a large grin. I've been told that they were infectious, and now was the time to see how true that claim was.

It wasn't. His face, if possible, folded itself into an even larger frown than before. I could put the saddest clown beside him and its frown would be no where near as large as his. I didn't even know it was possible to encompass so much displeasure in one expression.

"What do you want, Evans," Severus asked in a flat, wary voice. He eyed me cautiously, as if he expected me to strike out at him.

I shrugged. "Just wondered if you'd like to take a stroll with me…around the lake."

He blinked, then blinked again, slightly surprised. He tugged at his raven hair and narrowed his dark eyes in suspicion.

"I guess I've never properly introduced myself," I pushed. It was true. Seven years of classes with him and we've never exchanged more than two sentences, and even then it was only when we were asking the other for spare spider legs. T'was a shame.

I offered him my hand, thinking to astound him with my amazing handshaking skills, but he didn't take it. I frowned at the awkward silence. Fortunately (or unfortunately) James chose that moment to come out of his stupor and had caught up to us, panting slightly.

"Lily!" he cried (again!) as he neared, but was forestalled from saying more as he laid eyes on my companion. "Snape."

Severus shot James an equally cold look and squared his shoulders, managing to look formidable, though he was some two inches shorter. "Potter."

And they just stood there. Yep, plain stood there, motionless. Like statues. I looked between the two of them, waiting for something to happen (at this point even a blink from one of them would do), but nothing. It was as if someone had placed a freezing charm over the two. At this point the world could blow up and Lucius Malfoy could dance by in a toga and they wouldn't even flinch.

How long would it be before one of them moved? I questioned to myself. If I were to, say, go upstairs, take a quick bath, and come back down, would they still be standing there, glaring into each other's eyes? I suddenly had a strong urge to jump in front of them and shout "BOO!"

Needless to say, I suppressed it.

"Er…guys?" I said hesitantly, looking from one to the other nervously. If a fight should break out, Severus would have no chance! I pulled out my wand just in case.

Then, a brilliant idea occurred to me. What I'd do is, prod one of them with my wand. That'll startle them into reacting. What genius, Lily, what genius.

The question was who to poke? I had just started to make a mental pro and con list when Severus broke the silence.

"Go away, Potter," he snarled in that cold voice of his, and I'm sure if I stuck my hand in front of him, I'd feel sparks.

James glared at his adversary for a few moments more, seeming to sum up his worth, then turned to me. "Let's go, Lily," he said, and made to herd me away.

"No, James, leave me alone," I protested, but he had grabbed my arm (still sore from yesterday, might I mention) and was leading me away. I looked over my shoulder at Severus, who was staring at us in confusion. "I'll meet you at the hourglasses in fifteen minutes!" I called at him, but before I could hear his response, James had pulled me around the corner like a puppy on a leash.

"What's your problem, Potter?" I snarled as soon as he had let me go, rubbing at my arm where his fingers had pinched me. I fingered my wand through my robes and did my best impression of a large, angry dragon. I'd show him my awesome ninja…er, charms skills.

"Shut up and listen, Lily."

That threw me off guard. I teetered on the balls of my feet, still in the middle of a lunge. I stood there, balanced crazily with one arm, my wand arm, extended, my other flung out behind me, wavering on my tiptoes, too surprised to be angry any longer. I'm sure I looked like some kind of insane ballerina.

And next, Lily Evans will do her stunning rendition of A Midsummer Night's Dream.

I quickly righted myself again. James paced around for a moment, then turned to stare at me for a few moments, worried.

I sighed in frustration. "You said 'listen'. I listened. I'm not aware that 'listening' entitled standing around having a staring contest with you for an interminable amount of time."

But James just stood there frowning. "Crud," he said after a moment, then flicked his wand quickly and muttered "Sirius."

Then there was silence. I stared at him, he stared at me. I narrowed my eyes, searching his for any sign of trickery. "Sirius" could be code for anything. He could be summoning a thousand banshees to screech me to death, or a troll to clobber me. Or "Sirius" could mean "Hey little-girl-eating-monster, I've got her cornered!" I must be on the alert. Squinting, I was just about to take a step forward, when—

Crash, Bang, Boom!

These highly unmelodious sounds came from—you guessed it—directly behind me. What luck I've been having recently. I swear, if you take all my luck and condense it into tiny luck-pellets, you wouldn't have enough to plug your ear. Well, unless you just happen to have an especially small ear, but I'm not putting any money on that.

I jumped what must've been ten feet in the air, landing awkwardly and performing a sort of gawky pirouette before coming to a dazed stop, some three feet right of where I had been.

Did you see that, Ladies and Gentlemen, what fantastic form!

Crud. No one saw that. No one saw that. I'll perform a combined memory charm myself if I have to, and I'll curse the first person who brings it up, so help me, I will. I'll trap them in a jar and suffocate them. I'll tear them apart with my teeth if it came down to it.

Well…maybe not that last one. I happen to like my teeth very much.

Apparently, as I quickly realized, "Sirius" mean just that—Sirius. I spun around, and saw Sirius Black standing in the spot I had just vacated. He looked extremely tired and not himself.

Holy…! Where in the name of oatmeal did that boy come from? One minute he's not there, and the next he is, looking as solid as a fork. I swear, there must be a million Sirius Blacks hidden in various strategic places of the castle, ready to appear and give me a heart attack at the drop of a hat.

"Trouble, James?" he asked, then spotted me, and the two shared a wary look, while I stood there, trying to look like I knew what they were talking about.

"She didn't see the note?"

"She didn't heed the note," James confirmed, and he shot me an angry look, which I gladly returned.

Sirius heaved a sigh, looking like he didn't want to have to deal with all this, and rubbed his cheek. "So…who?"

"Dunno."

I looked from one to the other, thoroughly convinced that they had somehow decided that confusing someone to death was an apt form of torture. And they were right; it was. Uh, hello guys? Remember me? Lily Evans, Head Girl? I'm dying here!And did I mention I was annoyed? Because I was. Very much so. To the point where I was ready to drag the two by their hair to the top of Mount Everest and give each one a gentle nudge off the top.

"You should've picked a different night," Sirius was saying.

Another night for what? I felt like screaming at the two of them. Another night for hockey? For poker? For playing tag with house elves? …Not that I had ever played tag with the house elves, I swear!

"Dammit, Sirius, I forgot, you know that. I had next Tuesday in mind."

Hokay, this was getting ridiculous. If they weren't going to explain to me what the Hell was going on, weren't even going to acknowledge the fact that I was there, then forget them. I had to meet Severus in five minutes and Gods help me but I wasn't going to stick around to be confused to death.

I started slowing backing away, then, ten steps later, I bolted. When I could no longer hear their voices behind me, I slowed, caught my breath, and high-fived the nearest statue of armor. Well, actually, the second nearest statue of armor. The first one looked like a gust of wind could knock it over.

There you have it, Ladies and Gentlemen, the great Lily Evans had done it again.

Two minutes later I was safely in the Entrance Hall, standing to the right of the Gryffindor hourglass waiting for Severus to show. My reflection in the glass showed that I was extremely disheveled, so I smoothed my robes as best I could. It would have to do.

I was slightly curious as to what James and Sirius had been conversing about, but there was no way I'd miss this date with Snape.

Did I call it a date? Well, I suppose it was. Or at least it was a mini date. I hoped he'd bring flowers. Maybe he'd even bring a box of chocolates. Or a gold ring. Chocolate, diamonds, and gold. What fun.

I could picture it now. He'd shyly hand me the flowers and the chocolates, then get down on one knee and present to me the most stunning ring the world had ever seen. And we'd get married in a little chapel. We'll go to the Caribbean for our honeymoon, of course. We will rent our own little houseboat and everything. He'll pick me up in his strong arms, carry me into our room, and toss me onto the bed, where…Ahem.

I'm not crazy, of course not. What would make you say that? Uh…Look over there! A centaur!

As it turned out, Severus didn't bring flowers. He didn't even show up. I waited and waited, but nothing. I began to worry. I mean, what if he got eaten by a giant troll on the way up from the Dungeons? What if he was currently being digested, robes and all? What if he had been kidnapped by a giant fire breathing…bird thing and was now dangling helplessly on the astronomy tower, crying for help?

What if he had spontaneously combusted? What if he had been attacked by leeches? Boggarts? Flobberworms? It was highly probable.

Okay, calm down, Lily, calm down. He was just a little late. He'll be here. No; I'll go fetch him. That's what I'll do. I'll go fetch Severus Snape myself. He was just shy, poor guy.

I made my way down into the dark dungeons, past the Potions classroom to where I knew the Slytherin common room was. A stone ghoul type thing barred the entrance way, and the moment I neared, it opened its stone lids and looked at me with eyes that were a startling blue.

"Password?" it breathed—or, hissed, more like. I'm sure I saw a forked tongue.

Er…password. Uh…uh..I know this, just give me a minute.

"Password?"

"Give me a moment, dammit," I muttered. "Uh…Slytherin…rules?"

The statue raised an eyebrow.

Okay, that wasn't it. That's okay, I'd just try again.

"Snake…y."

It stared just stared at me.

"Gryffindors are stupid."

"Gryffindors are ugly?"

"Vile?"

"Trolls?"

"Dumber than trolls?"

"insufferable gits?"

Five minutes later and at least twenty insults later, I was drained of all ideas. I had one option: beg.

"Let me in," I implored, all but flinging myself at the statue's feet, "I mean no harm. I just need to see someone, then I'll be out as quick as a flash. I won't even go in; I'll just call from outside the door. Please?"

The stupid feelingless ghoul looked at me coldly but made no comment.

"Dammit you worthless piece of cinder, let me in or I'll have you painted in pink and yellow daisies!"

Fortunately, before I could further embarrass myself, the gargoyle blinked and rose with a considerable amount of shifting and took a step aside. Yellow daisies? That was the password? Damn I was good! I—

"What are you doing here, Evans?" sneered a cold voice and I looked up to see Narcissa appear from behind the statue. Oh. It wasn't yellow daisies after all. Well, that was good, for I had been having trouble imagining the Slytherings frolicking about their common room wearing nothing but wreaths of yellow daisies. Not a fun image.

"Narcissa!" I cried, too excited to remember that I hated her. "Severus, is Severus there? He's there, is he not?"

She looked me over with her pale eyes and bared her teeth much like a dog bares his. "Why do you want to see him?"

"That doesn't concern you," I replied curtly, trying to get past her and into the room.

"You're right, it doesn't," she replied, and turned to leave. I saw the ghoul pick itself up, ready to move in front of the door again.

"No!" I cried, loosing all sense of dignity. "I…Snape, he…he left his quill. I wanted to return it."

"Give it to me and I'll see that he gets it." She smirked at me, and I cursed my transparent-lie-ness.

"Ah, Dammit Black. We have a date. Severus and I. Now would you please let me see him."

I don't think anything I could've said would have shocked her more, save "I'm actually a male stripper from Ethiopia". Her eyes opened wide and for a moment she lost her composure. When she regained it, however, her expression was amused, mocking. Without a word she disappeared back into the room, leaving me with the statue, who looked at me as if daring me to move.

Finally, after sever nerve wracking moments in which I decided to never look at anyone with blue eyes again, Narcissa reappeared with Severus at her elbow.

"Evans here says you two have a date, Severus. She's been making a fool out of herself for the last ten minutes." she purred.

Severus looked appalled, glancing at me then back at Narcissa. "We had no such agreement," he finally said smoothly, his eyes fixed on me.

"I told you to meet me in front of the hourglasses an hour ago," I reminded him, a bit hurt.

Black looked from me to Snape, then back again, and finally gave a dainty little shrug. "I grow bored with this whole ordeal, and Lucius is no doubt waiting impatiently by now," she sang. "Have fun on your date, and don't stay out too late." She gave me one last haughty smirk and swept away in a cloud of perfume.

After a few moments Severus gave me a thoroughly disgusted look and turned to leave as well.

I panicked. After all I had gone through, I wasn't about to let him get away. "Wait," I cried, and grabbed his arm.

Severus looked at me coldly, then shrugged me aside. "Let go of me, mudblood," he sneered.

You know, coming from him, the word "mudblood" didn't actually sound as bad as it used to. It was much more original than "Dear", or "Honey." I decided he could call me it as often as he liked.

I looked him right in the eye, letting my eyes roam his face. He was singularly pale, and the nose was far from, er…small, but there was a certain attractiveness in pale faced, large nosed guys, I decided. And while he lacked muscle, he had the body of a poet. Lithe, and slightly gawky, but in a good way…I suppose.

And there was something about his quiet determination that was quite attractive. Forget tall, dark, and handsome. Forget cute and rugged. I'd go for Mr. Strong and Silent any day.

Suddenly, right in the midst of the cold dungeon, flanked on one side by that atrocious gargoyle (who was still watching me, might I mention), and on the other by the Slytherin Common room, I felt a miraculous change come over me, and I knew.

It was love. Pure, wonderful love. I felt it in every pore of my body, in every cell, and I felt like shouting it to the world.

…Of course, the world was currently otherwise occupied, so I supposed I'd have to make due with Severus himself and the statue, which no longer looked so hideous, by the way. I decided I loved it, too. Mr. Scary statue guy, would you do me the honor of becoming my husband?

No, I didn't say that aloud.

The entire transformation had taken place in a split second, and when I finally regained control of my senses again, Snape was still looking at me with that disgusted look on his face. It mattered not, I decided. Love could overcome anything.

"Severus," I breathed, and, tightening my hold on his arm, I dragged him out from the doorway, swung him around (fear my muscles of steel), pushed him against the stone wall, and pressed my lips to his.

They were cold and unfeeling but I didn't care. I molded my body to his and ran my hands through his raven hair. It was bliss, pure bliss.

Suddenly there was nothing in the universe but Severus Snape and I. (And…er, that statue, who was still watching us with indifference.) Nothing but deep, unfathomable love. The love of two lovers who loved each other. A lot.

..Then a pair of rough hands grabbed me by the shoulders and wrenched me from my love and my happiness. James.

Okay. The French maid I could take. The dwarf I could take. But this? This was too much. He had no right, no right to drag me away from Severus (and Mr. Ugly Statue) like this. Couldn't he see that something beautiful was taking place here?

"Potter!" I screamed, and was about to hit at him when he grabbed my shoulders again, this time from the front, and shook me.

Let me tell you. When James Potter is angry, he's one heck of a good shaker. And no, I don't mean that in a perverted way.

"What the hell are you doing, Lily?" James snarled, finally stopping and looking me in the eye. I hate to admit it, but I actually recoiled from the expression in his eyes.

Not anger. Pain.

Before I could ponder any further, however, James had shoved me roughly aside into another pair of arms. Sirius. By Gods, was I to spend the rest of my life being shoved from pair to pair of arms?

"Let me go, Black," I ground out, trying to get free, but he held me still without a word, despite my twisting and kicking. His eyes were fixed on Severus, who was still recovering from my advances.

"Snape!" James seethed, turning his wand on him, and my eyes grew wide. No! He was going to kill Severus! I cursed Sirius and thrashed, but all to no avail.

Nonononono. This couldn't be happening. Why, why did James have to ruin my one moment of happiness, why? Why wouldn't he leave me alone? He couldn't kill Severus, we were supposed to get married. We were supposed to grow up and have little mini Severuses and mini Lilys. The statue can be their godfather, of course, and we'll find a bride for him too, and…and…

"Expelliarmus!" Potter cried, catching Severus off guard and sending his wand skittering down the corridor.

"James!" I cried, almost weeping now, "No!" but he paid me no heed.

"Potter," Severus sneered, and for a moment I wondered if this was to be another one of those staring contests. Oh please let it be another one of those staring contests. That'd give me time to murder Sirius and save my love.

Apparantly James wasn't in the mood for games. "Never touch Lily again," he breathed softly and dangerously, and raised his wand.

He shouted a curse. And in that split second before the curse left his wand tip, all I could think about was what would happen if hit target. And I acted.

Somehow I managed to wriggle free from Sirius' grasp, and as I bolted forward I heard him give a yelp, but it was too late. I was free, and I had thrown myself directly in front of Severus, my arms opened wide, shielding him with my own body.

It was strangely painless.

---

Stars. Millions of them, twinkling stars, spread out in a velvet blue sky like little shining diamonds calling out to me. I just had to grab one. And so I reached out and did so.

The moment my hand touched it, the star vanished, dissolved and disseminated in the nonexistent wind. So this was death? Stars? How decidedly boring. Where were the dancing possums, the friendly fawns? Where was the handsome, well sculpted god to feed me grapes and white wine? This was stupid. This was dumb. I decided I did not want to die after all.

I opened my eyes.

Hospital wing. Gee, how original. When having just experienced a close brush with (and having rejected) death, the hospital wing was the standard place to find oneself. Could they get any more uncreative?

And then I remembered exactly why I was here, and what exactly I had been doing just before I'd been injured. Let me tell you, it wasn't particularly pretty. Suddenly, it all became clear, what had happened, why it had happened, and who's fault it was that it had happened. I'll give you three guesses.

The necklace, that was it. A simple love charm, conceived to make the wearer fall in love with the first person of the opposite sex that she sees. Except that it backfired. In the worst possible way.

I groaned, feeling sore, and rolled onto my tummy, burying my head in the pillow.

"Someday, Lily, you're really going to give me a heart attack."

James. That was his voice, I was sure of it. Of all the people in the world, did it have to be him?

Go stuff your head in a cauldron, James, and never talk to me again.

I said nothing.

I heard him give a small sigh. "I suppose you've figured out what happened...and I suppose I better get this apologizing thing over with before you remember where your muscles are and kill me."

I simply laid there, not paying attention to James' babbling that he was sorry and that he didn't mean for things to happen the way it did and that he'd dye his entire head pink if it would make me forgive him. Which wasn't such a bad idea.

One good thing about the jinx that James had hit me with, at least it jolted me from the confines of the love charm. Otherwise I'd probably be doing some very unseemely things with Severus Snape in a broom closet right now. And believe me, while I was—ugh—kissing Snape earlier, I'd wanted to do some very wrong things indeed. I'll spare you the details, but let's just say it involved chains. I suddenly felt nauseas, and considering the very bad image that I'd just had, I couldn't blame my stomach for wanting to reject all its contents.

Maybe if I just lay here, I'll change time by the force of my will. Maybe today was just a dream, and I was actually only here because I tripped over a bookbag, fell down the moving staircase, and landed face first in a pile of ectoplasm.

And maybe tomorrow the sky will turn to dust and Lucious Malfoy will shave his head.

I sighed and nuzzled further into the pillow, too weary to feel any real emotion. Gods. Was the boy still talking? Apparently, yes.

"I don't know what you want from me, Lily, gods know I've tried everything to get you to like me. Guess I need to try harder." James' voice had a bitter note to it, and without looking I knew exactly the expression on his face. Every crease, wrinkle, and nuance.

"Er….Lily?"

Can't you see that I don't want to talk to you right now, Potter? Is the suffocating myself with a pillow not enough for you? What do you want me to say?

"Yes, well…" The remark was followed by the scraping of a chair as James pushed it back, rising.

"I have a detention," he said, "several, actually, and I'm late. Nurse will probably be here to chase me out soon anyhow. Rest up, Lily. You'll need to save your strength for being angry at me tomorrow." He paused. "I'd give you something for day five, but…I'd rather not risk it."

He paused, and I waited before his steps had retreated before I let my breath out and rolled back onto my back. So he'd shy away from me for a while.

I wondered that I didn't feel any happiness at that thought. I'd always thought, that, when this day came, I'd run around in circles, sing "hallelujah" and go waltz with the giant octopus, but strangely now I had no such urge.

I was also surprised that I didn't feel quite so much anger toward him as I had expected. Under any other situation I'd be raging, breathing fire and cutting his body into ten hundred pieces…but right now all I felt was weariness.

Ah well. I was tired. Give it some time, and I'd be sure to be octopus bride tomorrow.

---

A/N:

And there you have it. Not anything to be proud of, but at least I finally got it up. Reviews are welcomed. Seriously. The sporadic reviews I got after the last chapter went up were the only thing that kept me from abandoning the story all together.

Oh, and ideas—very needed. I'm out of them.