Title: Baby on Board
author: Jmaria
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Joss owns Firefly - I unfortunately don't.

Spoilers: Set through Firefly, but no Serenity spoilers
Summary: One of Serenity's passengers contemplates motherhood.

A/N: Okay, I really don't know where this came from - so I'll blame the Heart of Gold episode, because there's a lot of baby talk in that one.

Everyone on board is nervous, have been since her belly started growin' on account of it's own. They tip-toe around her, everyone of 'em thinkin that she's some sort of hassle they want nothing to do with. Cap'n out right proposed marriage, e'vn tho it ain't his baby. She could never claim him, not while 'Nara held his heartstrings so tight in her cultured hand. He ain't been the same since she left. Some folks wouldn't even meet her eyes, that's for sure. Kaylee and Simon try so heard to be sweet, but anger and confusion lie so close to the surface that it makes her body throb in pain and guilt.

Shepard Book talks to her, mentions the special hell a lot, 'specially when mentioning the father. What father will claim her? She's not right, dangerous and her father's long since left her. Mal and Book, substitutes, but not the same.

Wash and Zoe look at her with joy, hopes for their own future. One day, maybe we'll thoughts linger on their minds

Only one who doesn't talk is Jayne. He knows what he knows, and she knows that he's good with children, tells her every time he thinks of home, of his Momma and Mattie, and such. He can't remember the important things, he doesn't see what he oughta remember, and she's fine with that.

All she can think about is who is in there, what it's thinking. She's not fit to be anyone's rock, hero, and savior. She's just a girl. Knows nothing about being a woman, grown and tall and motherly. She's a child, gets dressed up like a gorram doll sometimes, sees things she's not supposed to, shouldn't, couldn't know.

"Who's in there, little one? Have you your father's eyes I wonder? And this lady's mind?"

Makes Simon nervous and angry. Who'd sullied his baby sister? Who'd made her mind a mess so and she can't even remember who sullied and wronged her. Simon was such a handful and she was tiring of trying to mind him. Had half a normal mind, couldn't split it much more. Had a baby to try and mother, and a father to remind.