ANOTHER SATURDAY NIGHT
S J Smith
Disclaimer: All rights, responsibilities, etc., are retained by the WB. I'm just playing around, here.
Rating: Anyone can read.
Note: Written after an on-line discussion with MzzGoddessBlue. So this is for her.
The door opened with a squeal and closed with something awfully close to a slam. Luke raised his eyes from the newspaper he was reading to watch his cousin, Bo, open the refrigerator, pull out the pitcher and pour himself a glass of lemonade. Making a face and obviously wishing for something stronger, Bo took his drink with him as he sat at the table.
"Ain'cha home a little early?" Luke asked from the living room, twitching the paper to look over the top of it.
"I don't wanna talk about it," Bo muttered, spinning the glass in his hands.
"Weren't you supposed to be out all night with with that sweet Mary Jane?" He raised the paper to hide his grin.
Nearly knocking his chair over as he stood up, Bo snapped, "I said I don't wanna talk about it!"
"Hey, hey, take it easy," Luke said, alarmed. He dropped the paper on his way into the kitchen, cautiously laying a hand on his cousin's shoulder. When Bo didn't shrug it off, he went on. "It was just a question, cuz. I didn't mean anything by it. Just didn't expect you home 'til later, is all."
"Yeah, well." Bo dropped heavily into his chair. "You ain't the only one." Sighing, he raised hurt puppy eyes to Luke. "If it ain't one dang thing, it's another."
Luke fetched himself some lemonade, giving Bo a little space. "Wanna tell me what happened?" he asked over his shoulder.
"Not sure I wanna," Bo said, squirming. When he noticed his cousin's gaze, he turned his attention back to his glass.
Settling into the chair opposite Bo, Luke said, "C'mon. Maybe I can help fix it."
"I don't think any of your bright ideas will help me out this time," Bo said darkly.
He tapped his glass against Bo's. "I'm guessin' your date didn't go too well."
"You're a genius," Bo grumbled, shooting him a glance from under lowered brows.
Leaning back in his chair, Luke studied his cousin obliquely. Bo was more hurt than mad, or so it seemed to him. "Mary Jane liked you well enough last Sunday. What happened to change her mind this Saturday?"
"Nothin'."
"C'mon, cuz," Luke said. "Might as well tell me now; save the shame of me havin' t' hear it from Cletus."
Bo's head jerked up at that, his eyes wide as a fawn's. "You wouldn't."
"Ask him?" Luke shrugged, the corners of his mouth pulling down. "Nah." At his cousin's relief, he said, "I won't have to. It'll be all over Hazzard tomorrow anyway."
Defeated, Bo let out a heavy sigh. "I headed over to the Culbertson farm to pick up Mary Jane and everything was just fine. Her momma and daddy were there, happy to see me," he added, catching sight of Luke's eyebrows going up, "an' they said we should go out an' have a good time."
"That's mighty nice of 'em," Luke said. "Then what?"
"We was talkin' and all, Mr. Culbertson said he might have some work for us on that ol' barn of his." Tilting back in his chair, Bo smiled dreamily in remembrance. "Then Mary Jane walks into the room in some fancy dress. Some number they'd sell at some big store in Hotlanta. I could tell she'd gotten all dressed up for me."
Luke nodded in agreement. "Sounds like she likes you, cuz. She made an effort." He frowned suddenly. "You didn't forget to complement her, did you?"
Bo leaned across the table to meet his eyes. "That ain't the problem, Luke. I appreciated the effort. Really." He got that same hazy look on his face as he said, "An' I showed her how much on the front porch of her house."
Letting out a low whistle, Luke said, "An' her daddy didn't appreciate that."
"No, nothin' like that," Bo said with a shake of his head. "We walked out to the General Lee an' Mary Jane waited for me to open the door."
The light dawning, Luke fought back a grin. "You mean."
"I mean." Thumping a finger on the table for emphasis, Bo said, "There weren't no way that dress was gonna go through the General's window." He glared across the table. "This ain't funny, Luke."
He managed to turn his laugh into a cough, though it nearly choked him. "No," he strangled, then managed to make his voice sound almost normal, "no, it ain't." A snicker escaped him like steam from a kettle, making Bo's eyebrows dip even farther down. Luke gulped at his lemonade, coughed again and asked, "So what happened then?"
"Mary Jane had t' go back inside and change her clothes. An' that didn't make her none too happy."
"I suppose not." After all, the girl had gotten all dressed up to impress Bo, Luke thought. He tried biting the inside of his cheek to keep from smiling but it wasn't working. "Then what?"
Sighing heavily again, Bo said, "Well, she wanted t' go someplace fancy." He rolled his eyes.
Luke did a double take. "Fancy? In Hazzard?"
With a 'what can you do' shrug, Bo said, "I was thinkin' of a walk along Cherokee Ridge an' she was thinkin' a catfish dinner with all the trimmin's."
Shaking his head sympathetically, Luke noticed Bo's expression. "Don't tell me there's more?"
"Dang right there's more. Mary Jane got changed, we got into the General and started to drive up to Cherokee Ridge - "
"You talked her into it?"
Smiling sarcastically, Bo said, "C'mon, cuz, I do know somethin' about charmin' ladies." His grin faded as he went on. "Everythin' was goin' okay but then we ran into one o' Roscoe's li'l speed traps. You know what that means. Cletus comes speedin' out after us an' Mary Jane's tellin' me t' pull over when we hit that dry creek bed over near Brookville farm."
"Hit it as in," Luke said cautiously.
Arcing his hand over his lemonade, Bo made a whistling sound. "Cletus is okay," he added hastily, noticing Luke's expression. "But Mary Jane, she didn't take kindly to jumpin' the creek."
Luke strangled back a laugh, managing to choke out, "She didn't? Dang, Bo. Maybe you shoulda given the girl some sorta warnin'." He licked his upper lip, still trying to get control of himself. It wasn't working.
"You wanna hear the rest of this or just laugh at my misery, cuz?"
He wiped his eyes so he could see Bo. "You mean there's still more?"
"Well, sure. Mary Jane's havin' a fit over my li'l over-the-creek jump an' Cletus is of course," Bo rolled his eyes again, "right behind us. He scuffs his vehicle," here he imitated Roscoe's voice, "but he's okay, like I said. But the way Mary Jane's carryin' on, you'd done think I'd stole somethin' from Fort Knox and shot up all the guards. She don't wanna go anywhere else with me, not even home, so when Cooter shows up to haul Cletus back into town, Mary Jane gets a ride with him."
"And that's it?" Luke asked.
Bo snorted. "'Course not. Mary Jane said she don't never wanna go out with me again, 'cause I don't know how to treat a lady. Well, go on, laugh."
Luke leaned over the table to slap his cousin on the shoulder. "I think, with a story like that, you deserve a beer at the Boar's Nest. Just to drown your sorrows."
"I think that's the best thing I heard all night, cuz," Bo said, rising to his feet. He wagged a finger at Luke. "You're buyin', though."
"Why me?" Luke pulled back like Maudine did, when she didn't want to be bridled.
Bo poked out his lower lip in an exaggerated pout. "'Cause I've had a hard night."
"Yeah, I suppose that's true," Luke said. He elbowed Bo as he walked by. "Maybe we can find you a nice girl at the Boar's Nest."
Holding up his hands in mock horror, Bo said, "Heck no, cuz. I'm thinkin' about swearin' off women."
Luke laughed all the way to the General Lee.