Noodle felt like she was empty, but it was a sucking, greedy void that wanted more from her than anything she had to give.

Her head hurt, always. A throb under her left eye that seemed to signify that the emptiness was there, slicing off bits of her consciousness to consume. Every time she ate a slice of cheese on a cracker, it made her wonder if the emptiness ate her brain the same way. Little wedge after little wedge, until the entire wheel is gone.

The whole of her hurt, always. Her joins, her skin, her eyes, her legs, her arms...like everything was trying to be sucked inwards and consumed. A black hole inside her head, pulling everything up and away.

So when Noodle left the Winnie for the first time and went to see 2D and Russel, she was shrunken. There were circles under her eyes. Her voice was small, her breath was shallow and rotten. Her shoulders, hunched. Her neck, low. They were shocked to see her alive and even more so to see that, while she was living with him, Murdoc was studiously ignoring her rapid decline of health. He followed after her with a hand on her frail shoulder and presented her to them, like a bounty hunter with a captured criminal, waiting for a reward.

After a minute, Russel reached out slowly, running a hand over her head. He could not stop the grimace that leaped to his face at the feel of her coarse, oily hair. He pulled his hand away and wiped it on the side of his leg absently, not even paying attention to the movement. Noodle, still sharp, noticed quietly and did not say a word. She spoke very quietly a moment later, "May I take a shower?" and was rewarded immediately. 2D escorted her to the cleanest bathroom in Kong, the one he had made a point of keeping clean in case of her eventual return. It was unusual for the normally half-dead vocalist to devote much time or effort to anything, but the bathroom had slowly become spotless, and then started to fill up with personal hygiene products that reminded him of Noodle. Any scent that reminded him of her, he bought. Lotion, shampoo, perfume, toothpaste, mouthwash, body wash, hand soap, he had filled up all the little cabinets. A shower curtain with the Japanese flag on it, white towels with red washcloths, plush white mats on the floor.

The bathroom had been the only thing that had kept him sane during her absence. "She'll be back, and when she gets back, she might need a shower, or a soak in the tub, or she might want to brush her teeth or put on smelly stuff. I'll have it all ready and waiting. I'll have it all here, for when she gets back." Had been his mantra for the time that she'd been gone. It kept him tied to her, in his heart. And now she was finally going to use it. 2D's heart soared as he opened the door to the bathroom, turned on the slightly dimmed lighting and presented it to her with a flourish of his nervous arm.

"For you, Noodle. I did it for you." The pride was evident in his voice.

She thanked him with a shallow bow and a whispered, "Thank you." before silently ushering him out and closing the door behind him.

2D backed away from the door quietly, slightly hurt but also elated to know that she was using the bathroom for it's intended purpose: cleansing.

He came back into the main lobby just in time to see Russel throw Murdoc through a glass table.

--

After 2D had whisked Noodle away, Russel and Murdoc stood in a heavy and uncomfortable silence.

That was, until, Russel roared and punched Murdoc in the mouth. He didn't resist, took it almost as a punishment. Russel's thick, meaty fist hit Murdoc in the jaw, knocking loose two rotten teeth, and Murdoc hissed. The second hit, to the opposite side, hit his cheekbone and he was sure he felt something shift that was supposed to be stationary. He flew against a wall and Russel hit him until he was sure he was nothing more than a bag of liquid.

2D came in just as Russel picked up his limp body and threw him through a pretty glass table.

The impact hurt, and Murdoc stared up at the slightly moldy ceiling passively. He could feel the shards of glass piercing his back, and thought for a second that now that his skin was broken, his liquefied organs would leak out of his spine. There was a heavy silence, amplified by the sound of small glittery glass pieces tinkling off of Murdoc, and the oppressive sound of Russel's breathing.

"This is new." 2D looked between Murdoc and Russel.

After a minute, he walked over, the glass crunching under his feet, and helped Murdoc up. "But, I have to agree that you deserved it." And he helped Murdoc over to the worn couch.

--

In the bathroom, Noodle let the hot water run over her. She stood, with her face up, surrounded by pleasant smelling steam. She'd chosen a vanilla shampoo, and was letting the conditioner soak into her hair. Slowly, she picked up a fluffy red bath pouf and poured a liberal amount of body wash onto it. As she scrubbed herself, she closed her eyes tighter and imagined all of her sins engraved in her pores like dirt, and scrubbed harder.

Noodle scraped the pouf across her skin, rubbing it raw.

--

Murdoc winced as Russel tugged a large piece of glass out of his back. "That hurts, you know."

"Good." was the grunted reply.

2D sat by with a bottle of rubbing alcohol, swabbing the wounds that Russel dug glass out of, and slapping bandages on the deeper ones. They sat in silence, a faux doctor and nurse.

--

As Noodle descended the steps, the first thing she smelled was blood. Raising her eyebrow, she looked around the corner and almost smiled at the sight of the boys playing doctor. Murdoc caught sight of her and his face remained blank, but he tilted his head up slightly and she turned the corner.

It's time to explain everything.

--

How long has it been, my loves? One, two years? More? I apologize for this failure of an update. I recently got a fan who IM'd me, Megan, and she desperately wanted the next chapter. I've had this for awhile, but it always remained unfinished, and therefore unposted. But she said it would make her so excited, so happy, and I am nothing if not a slave to my fans. I'm sorry for this lack-luster cliffhanger, but I'll try and figure these elusive personas out soon.

On the good side, I'm very close to having my Bachelor's degree in animation, hence the lack of updates. I still love every single one of you.